there's a provider i have known for two and a half years. when i first met her, i had sessions with her about two to three times a week for a period of six months. during this time, we saw each other so much we became friends, and spend a lot of time around each other off the clock.

for a year I was still sexually attract to her, but i wasn't seeing her a whole lot like when we first met.  about eight months ago i no longer felt sexually attracted to her. we still get along well as friends, and i like talking to her, because she's cool person. but she just does not do it for me sexually anymore.

not to long ago she she asked me how come you don't like to have sex with me anymore? but i couldn't find it in me to tell her.

Since you seem to know her and seem to know that telling her would hurt her, it's just nicer that way.

Also, don't make up a reason.  It would just be a lie and would more than likely lead to other lies to stay consistent with the original lie.  More drama than it's worth.

Hope that helps.

Which is probably the reason for the question.  If indeed you are really "friends" you should be able to tell her exactly what you wrote here.  And your friendship should be able to continue if indeed she sees the relationship as you are describing it.

But I suspect she sees that a John has kept on seeing her for no money, wasting her "valuable" time, and now she is asking if you intend on paying her going forward.

You'll find out VERY quickly just how good of "friends" you really are/were.

Good luck to you...but it is time to move on!

you are really friends, there will be no "after shock."  However, you need to find the right time & place to say this.  Otherwise, she could go postal on you.

"It's not you. It's me ... I'm not attracted to you."

It would be something interesting to explore with her. Lay it out on the line. You don't have much to loose. You may learn a lot about yourself in the process. Discuss how things have changed with you. Why don't you find her attractive now, but did 2 years ago? Do you enjoy the novelty of new ladies? Have you discovered things with new ladies that are now more appealing to you? Did you have a "crush" on her, and it has now worn off?

What you find out may be helpful to know when you are in a relationship with a civie. It may help you to know if this is the real thing. Are you only capable of relationships that only last a year or so. Once you know that about yourself, you may be able to find a counselor to help you figure out how to have long-term relationships with a lady.

She needs to understand that whats so great about this hobby is there are several different types of women and men are free to switch flavors whenever they choose...

If you are going to tell her try to say it in a nice way , with tact.

Dont forget no matter how much self esteem a female appears to have hearing that someone is attracted to you still hurts.

telling her something unflattering that she can't do anything about? That isn't being an honest friend. It's just mean.

If you have to say anything, make it something like your mongering has turned you into a novelty seeking pervert who can't appreciate the lovemaking of a good woman. Or just let her figure it out from your actions.

We ALL have done so...  it's so easy to do.  When one is friends with a provider, they can drop the GF illusion & we see their real lives.  Sometimes that's enough to turn us off...  or makebe we just get bored...  
I don't think you can tell her "She doesn't turn you on anymore"...  except to say "It's a guy thing" & otherwise take the blame.
The best thing is probably to quietly move on, see her less & less.  Repeat dates have a habit of eventually becoming lower performance.  They know how to get us off & take the easy way out.  I have this same situation myself.  I rotate among Favs (currently 3)...  yet the longest Fav (5 years) is winding down.  
Sometimes we have to remind ourselves this is a business arrangement only.  Either party can bow out at any time.
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