So I'm hoping that I can get some advice from you more seasoned hobbiests on how to make sure that these activities are kept a secret. I'm worried about financially,  time wise,  and electronically Being discovered.

Parties on both sides want to maintain secrecy, the ladies have just as much to lose as many of us do.  Hobby phone, hobby email, and cash only are your biggest allies here.  The self help center will answer a lot of your questions, but feel free to come back here for clarifications, that's what this board is here for.

in the thread above.  Stay safe and enjoy.