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Newbie - FAQ

I might be nitpicking here but I disagree with the 'most' modifier...
dreamweaver7 1576 reads
posted

In fact I feel that most ladies do not want your direct extension but rather the number of a switchboard operator, or the main number of your office/business, or the number of a secretary, etc. that will forward the call to your direct number.  It is the 3rd party involvement of a person between you and the provider that gives the ladies the security that you told her the truth as opposed to just calling your line/voice mail directly which gives them no assurance whatsoever.  I certainly will not say that no ladies use the direct line approach but to say that most do is far from my experience and understanding of how ladies use this type of verification...    



-- Modified on 6/18/2008 12:38:51 PM

starke4953 reads

Hello, all. Apologize if this is a very frequently asked question, but I did try the search and nothing would come up.

Totally new to this, and am very seriously considering taking the plunge very soon. Only thing that has me a little apprehensive is the screening process.

The provider I hope to see requests my work phone number for screening. Stupid question, but what do they do with it? Do they actually call and talk to the receptionist to see if I work there? Call my ext. directly to talk to me or hear my voicemail? Or just keep it on file in case the first meeting does not work out?

Thanks, in advance!

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zisk1921 reads

that you are who you say, and work where you claim

its just for their protection -- they've always called mine after hours to have my voice mail pickup but do not leave any messages

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starke4052 reads

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swimtrekr2618 reads

Often times, they will use a cover story, like a doctor's office calling to verify your appointment for tomorrow.  It the phone-answerer says they will get you the message, then provider knows you work there and are a real person, and more likely, not a cop.

Swim

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luv_women2734 reads

I would most certinly hope that a  women would never use a cover story about a doctor's office calling me.   That would probably raise more red flags with many people if a doctor called my office to confirm an appt.   I most certainly would not be happy if a woman called with a cover story like that.   Better just to ask for the person directly.

So either the woman should call the main number and ask for the person's extension, or dial his extension directly.  That is the best way to not raise any issues.

Do not try and be "cute" with some sort of cover story.  I get calls all the time where the person merely asked for me.

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sweetnicole11396 reads

I don't think it's a matter of "trying to be cute" as you put it.
I have been asked to call and confirm and asked to say I was from a drs office. Mainly just asking for the Gentleman is enough but sometimes the Gentleman asks you to state thats where you are from.  Its a case by case basis when it comes to verification. It's what works best to keep both safe and dicretion in tact.

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OneGent11448 reads

From my reading of earliest posts, it's often acceptable to offer a lady a script to use. While I would agree that in my situation someone calling from a doctor's office would be a disaster, I have so many people calling our office to try to sell something that our receptionists are trained to not transfer along anything that even smells like a sales call. They *may* take a message, if you're nice. So, I would need to provide a script if someone wanted to get to me via the main number.

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swimtrekr1215 reads

I only used doctor's office as an example of a reason for a provider to call the client's workplace.  In no way was I recommending that be used over any other excuse for calling.

Swim

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Crazy Diamond1755 reads

They may call your receptionship, they may call through directly to you, they may just consider your willingness to share this info as good enough to pass to pass screening.  All depends on the ladies screening procedure.  I wouldn't sweat this process; in my experience, you usually won't notice if they do call.  Only once received a call directly, and the lady was so subtle that it wasn't until several minutes after the call ended that I realized what had occurred.  Note that they do this for their personal safety in order to avoid LE and dishonest potential hobbyists whom may harm them.  If you wish to avoid this aa a newbie, then join a verification service such as Date Check 411 or RS 2000...

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hungry19512824 reads

Will call your direct extension, if you have one, as they may want to just chat for a minute or two. This also gives them a feel for what you'll be like in person. You can usually make specific arrangements through email so that nobody will know who she is when she calls. And as CD suggested, joining one of the verification sites is always a good idea.

Good luck

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dreamweaver71577 reads

In fact I feel that most ladies do not want your direct extension but rather the number of a switchboard operator, or the main number of your office/business, or the number of a secretary, etc. that will forward the call to your direct number.  It is the 3rd party involvement of a person between you and the provider that gives the ladies the security that you told her the truth as opposed to just calling your line/voice mail directly which gives them no assurance whatsoever.  I certainly will not say that no ladies use the direct line approach but to say that most do is far from my experience and understanding of how ladies use this type of verification...    



-- Modified on 6/18/2008 12:38:51 PM

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SweetJaneHR1633 reads

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hungry19511021 reads

The call does go through the switchboard. Then you can dial my direct extension, or dial the operator, and ask for my extension, which I always provide. Guess I should have been more specific. Every lady who has ever wanted to call has not had a problem doing it this way.

I didn't mean a direct line. Sorry for the confusion.

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hueyfan2027 reads

I am not comfortable doing it and won't.  Personally, I think it is too much information and not needed.  Bad experience....but that is a whole other story.

Safety and discretion is important for both you and the lady.  There are other ways to pass the litmus test.

When you are just starting out, you will need a reference or verification.  I would simply join a referral service (named in previous postings).

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WildTurkey-1011296 reads

The first thing most referral services are going to do is check your employment.

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