Say you attended a play with Richard Burton (back in the day) playing Hamlet.

You could get into the play and enjoy it, or think to yourself:  Hey, that's not really Hamlet, just some guy playing him.

And so it is with the hobby.  True, there's a lot more audience participation in the hobby then with a stage play, but the idea is the same.

Some people are not cut out for the hobby on account of their preoccupation with safety, or getting arrested, or - as in your case - not being able to disassociate the gal from the fantasy.

But try it once.  Maybe you'll surprise yourself.

As for rough play, you are seeking a sub, as they are known in the business.  Not sure if that is specifically noted on the TER profiles, but you can ask.  There are many of them out there, and they can be a pretty wild trip, as I found out after meeting a few.

That allows or enjoys that. If you pull out the hair pulling or slapping on a lady that does not you might be in for a huge and unpleasant surprise.  

Dude not the best advice to give a newbie because if some guy started that with me, he would be in for a very rude awakening.

she may also have picked her nose, taken a dump, popped a zit, eaten a liverwurst sandwhich, or any number of other things that might not exactly be turn ons to you.  It's all psychological, so just learn to live in the moment of being with a sexy lady who is THERE FOR YOU for an hour or two.  Once the fun has commenced, I really don't think you'll be thinking about other guys' weenies.

And next time spell "Prima Donna" with capitals to really make your point.

you have read about the value of TER VIP in being able to read the details in the reviews as well as PM other reviewers.  What you should care about are how the provider treats her hobbyist of the hour.  Does she make him feel like a king?  Or, does she go through the motions because she has seen 4 or more guys already that day.

Does that help you get over your hangup over the potential "dirtiness" of providers? If I had to make a generalization, the provider you encounter will be "cleaner" and more well-groomed than the girl you're trying to pick up at the bar (notwithstanding the very low rent providers). The truth is that the older you get, the more you're just happy to get laid. As long as she's focused on me, I don't really give a shit about what's happened before or after our encounter.  

I ask them if they would like to join me. Usually they do. But if they don't I've never had an instance where the lady wasn't fresh. It not something I give any consideration to.

On the kissing, when you give her a hug at the beginning, just turn your head if she tries to kiss you. She'll get it.  On DATY, just don't do it.  If you're concerned about her not getting off, ask her to bring her favorite toy and use it on her

Hey again,

Hi there,

OMG. You *really* have the wrong idea about me!
I'm not some beast that only gets off on rough sex, I would never try anything with anyone, provider or personal GF, until I had discussed it with them.

Hmmm, good points I suppose.

Thanks for the input!

Hi there, thank you so much for the reply, some good info.

After all, I don't know you. The issue is the general stigma that everyone involved in this realm is dirty, diseased, or "unclean" in some manner. Sex workers are often talked about as the dregs of society and your original post just reeked of that mindset (ex. "yuck factor" - your words). Sorry, but I felt it necessary to be a little harsh.  

...While some of what he says here is useful his delivery leaves quite a bit to be desired.

yz23--I bestow on you an honorary degree, you now have a brain!

other than your own imagination.  CP, and others, have made some excellent points.  To answer you main question however,  whenever I'm enjoying DFK or DATY with a girl the LAST thought on my mind is where she's been earlier.  And I think the lovely lady I'm with has a lot to do with that!!!

Sure slap my ass and pull my hair and this "dead fish", will spin around  like a Great White off seal island, so fast you won't even see it coming and return the favor.  

He seems to know more about what a provider can deal with...make that all providers. He seems to be the authority and me actually being a provider that one might actually meet...what do I know.

-- Modified on 9/28/2014 1:52:44 PM

This is the newbie board and I did not want you to go hell for leather and get in trouble or or on a DNS list.  

a conversation about what you want is a must and will get you what you want and how to ramp up to it in session.  yes there are plenty of providers who are ok and prefer no DFK and no DATY.  just use your words and ask!   if you are good with your hands and are willing to actually listen you can get her wild just that way and some gals really love mildly rough sex that has no kinky elements.  just being taken.  oh la la