Newbie - FAQ

Giving out personal information?confused_smile
hwk_man 2881 reads
posted

Hey folks,
I'm new to this.  I liked this provider (independent) but she was afraid somehow that i might be an LE!! lol.  She asked that she'll need to verify me through other providers.  I told her i'm very discrete and it's my first time and wanted this to be at most discretion.  

I really don't know what to do! Don't you guys feel a bit scared to give out personal informations about yourselves to those providers and agencies?  hell that scared the hell outta me.  I have a job that i want to keep and don't want them to find out that i do that kind of shit!  Has anyone a better idea of doing this without disclosing personal informations?  

Please let me know.  If there's no other way i'll just get back to the bar scenes which i really didn't have that much luck lately cuz most women they wanted serious relationships and i am not looking for any relationship!

thanks in advanced. :)

Dude, in my experiece, writing the first e-mail to the provider you've selected should be a good thing, if you have chosen correcty.  My initial e-mails were written like those of any personal dating boards, giving all of the information they have requested.  Your goal is to make make them feel comfortable to be able to see you, and to cooperate with their screening requierements.

If you don't want to give out your personal information, then search around for a provider that doesn't require screening.

Otherwise, you have to trust them, just like you are asking them to trust you.  After all, they are going to allow you into their house and into their bedroom in a very private setting.  Yes, it made me a bit nervous when I gave out my private information, but I only do it for well-reviewed, established proivders who I felt I could trust.

-- Modified on 8/5/2007 4:47:08 AM

Don't forget, you're asking them to trust you without knowing you.  or all they know, you could be a cop, a violent nutjob, or you might have a disease.  They're putting themselves at risk to be with you.

There are plenty of good providers who don't screen so you should do alright, but remember that both sides have something to lose if they don't respect each other's concerns.

No sapient, successful, legitimate provider would (will) allow a complete stranger into their home & bed without a cursory investigation to guard that he is not
(A)Law Enforcement,
(B)Spawn of Ted Bundy.

Most legitimate providers need only your name, a listed phone number in your name, your profession and main phone number of your employer(this info is NOT to effect identity theft with; but only to see if you ARE who you say, and that you DO what you say).
Any provider who asks for data such as your DL# or a credit card# or SS# should be avoided.

Keep in mind that no Con Man ever puts obstacles between his con and his sucker(s),
and an LE "sting" is by definition a "Con".

Some of us also have jobs (outside of this) that we want to keep and don't want them to find out that we do this "kind of shit". In fact, for some of us, it would mean the end of our careers, not just our present employment.

Don't assume that you're the only one with something to lose. Your desire to get off is not nearly as important to me as my safety and sanity.

Namaste,
Bella

ma vie1546 reads

petitebella is absolutely correct.  Screening is a good sign for clients anyway.  First of all, If she cares enough about herself to protect her security then she cares enough to keep you safe.  Look at it this way, why would you want to be with a provider who doesn't screen thoroughly?  If she is not careful with her personal security, she might not be careful with her use of protection.  Do you want an STD from a careless person?  Second, if she screens she is using her head.  The brain is the most important sex organ.  A woman who uses her brain is the best playmate!

I looked at petitebella's personal information requirements.  They are quite reasonable and normal.  Wish I was in Boston!

Comparing the bar scene to seeing escorts? I think you are confused a bit here.  These ladies are not cruising looking for a good time. They are professionals and screening is simply part of the process. They are not in business to cause problems for clients but they have every right to feel as safe as they can before agreeing to let a total stranger into their apartment or hotel room.

As Bostonguy essentially said there are different levels of girls in this profession.

There is a HUGE difference between a streetwalker  and a "real" higher end professional career escort as you will usually find here on TER.

Would I give a crackhead ghetto girl from Craigslist my personal info?  No.  But when you are dealing with a true professional it's her "job" to protect your privacy.

I know many other providers and every quality girl will tell you about the same thing.  We aren't intersted in your data, we are intersted in protecting ourselves.  You hire a professional BECAUSE we aren't going to show up at your job or home a week later to shake you down for dope money.

And as BG said, in some cases she is inviting you into her home, she needs to be sure you aren't an axe murderer.

So there is usually a happy medium that works for both partners when setting up a date.  If you don't feel comfortable trusting you data to a girl, there's always Tijuana or your local street corner... where you may get what you pay for (and a whole lot more...)

Have fun, play safe.

Giggle,
TS Jamie

If you don't want to play by the lady's rules, then move on.

AdriannaAzzure1391 reads

I couldn't agree more with all the previous posters. Screening first and foremost is for my protection. Standard screening information is nothing more than the info on your email sig or a biz card. If a lady wants more than that then you may want to seek another. but your true name and place of biz is virtually public knowledge. and not much to ask for what you stand to gain in return

-- Modified on 8/12/2007 7:39:00 AM

I've seen only a few ladies so far, but none of them ever screened me. All of them have lots of reviews by established hobbyists, so I never gave any thought about why I wasn't being screened, until I read the post that says screening is good for the hobbyist since it means the lady is careful and security-minded. That's a really good point and I agree completely. But IMHO, if a lady has several good reviews (at least four or five) by hobbyists who have several reviews to their name, then I figure she's legit even if she doesn't screen.

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