Newbie - FAQ

Don't waste your time "dumpster diving"
mrfisher 112 Reviews 2691 reads
posted
1 / 16

Maybe the best ever asked on here, in fact.

There are so many things that TER taught me that it's hard to pick out just one.

I'm going to give it some thought before I just blurt out something.

Bostonguy57 48 Reviews 515 reads
posted
2 / 16

TER is a great resource for anyone interested in the hobby but my best advice would be not to get too bogged down in the process. Read the boards, read the reviews and always think with your big head but remember that, ultimately, this hobby is about two total strangers engaging in a very intimate activity. You are not going to hit one over the fence every time.  The best way for you to figure out what sort of ladies you really enjoy being with is to get out there and do it.

shudaknownbetter 690 reads
posted
3 / 16

I don't care if you have a SO or not.  The hobby is a secret life, kept totally separate.  If you have to, you can close the book on it & no ghosts should be lurking around your door.

If you play in this hobby, you take it to the grave with you.  Need to talk?  Come here.  Do not tell your brother, best friend, buddy, GF, etc.  Not ever.  One slip & your @ss is on the line.  If you are about to marry someone, & need to reveal a sexual history...  "You've had girl-friends before."  It is nobody's business HOW LONG they were your GF for.  

As you read & learn about hobby phones, private email accounts, not using credit cards for purchases in laces you should not be, not using EZ Pass for places you should not be...  Do not use company computers or internet for adult activities (unless you own the company).

Some of us hobby often...  others on vacations or breaks.  What ever works for you.  

Start with well reviewed ladies...  get a feel for how the 2 call system works.  

Best Wishes,
skb

Ripped_Van_Winkle 618 reads
posted
4 / 16

And that is to never wear an expensive watch to a provider's incall. If you forget it you may never see it again.

Take your pants into the shower with you too.

wineguy3 4 Reviews 2705 reads
posted
5 / 16

Hello Everyone!

Just wanted to say a quick hello!  Glad to be here!

So this is where I’m at:  I’ve read the newbie primer (a couple of times) and will probably read it some more (a couple of times) before really getting started; I’ve poured over these discussion boards; I’ve signed up as a VIP member (Best. Decision. Ever) and was just verified on P411.

I feel like I’m on the right track, but I just have one question for the vets out there.  It’s going to be different for everyone and not one that’s easily searchable, but:

Is there something you wish you knew or had been told when starting out?  Is there some sage advice you can pass on that maybe isn’t readily available on these boards?

Thanks!  And I look forward to joining the community!

wg

hiddenhills 143 Reviews 760 reads
posted
6 / 16
superdogg69 22 Reviews 636 reads
posted
7 / 16


Always check for reviews here on TER. I personally start my search with BP, although I flip over here to check for reviews.

Some of the guys here recommend 6 or more reviews, but I respectfully have a different opinion. All I'm looking for is one or two reviews to be sure she's legit. I do however, when a gal has only one or two reviews, check the reviewer. If the guy reviewing her has multiple reviews accross a period of years, I'll consider that vouching for her.

If she only hs one review, and the guy reviewing her has only that review, I'd probably take a pass... there are plenty of fish in the sea.

Happy Hobbying!!!

RedRobin1972 24 Reviews 573 reads
posted
8 / 16

I'm starting out, too, so I'm not a vet. But the best advice I've received from a large consensus of people is ONLY SEE WELL REVIEWED PROVIDERS, PERIOD. No TOFTT at this stage of the game. Also, always trust your instincts. If you're going into a situation and it doesn't feel "right" (e.g. you think LE is around and it's a sting), stop and try again with another provider.

NickCharlesIII 7 Reviews 1188 reads
posted
9 / 16

Never assume that you know the slightest thing about how the ladies make decisions or do what they do. You are guaranteed to be wrong and to suffer for your error. They are all amazingly different in so many ways. If your goal is to have the best possible time with a particular lady on a particular occasion, follow her pre-meeting instructions to the letter and be open to her hints during your time together.

wineguy3 4 Reviews 2871 reads
posted
10 / 16

@ mrfisher: thanks for that!  Especially coming from you!  I look forward to your follow up!

@ skb: also awesome!  I think that’s a great way to keep this all in perspective.  I had never really thought about everything quite the way you put it, so thank you very much!

@ Ripped_Van_Winkle: very good advice indeed!  I don’t wear a watch but the pants will definitely follow me into the shower, or at least the bathroom.  

All of these are great insights!  Please, keep ‘em coming!

wg

hound_dog69 41 Reviews 785 reads
posted
11 / 16

there are some plain old ass-hats, who can usually be ignored with little ill effect.

The thing you have to be careful about is the few folks who have serious issues, that show up here from time to time. Folks with either "personality issues" or who otherwise do not have your best interests at heart (maybe they are sympathetic to the P4P/hobby way of life).

It can be hard to tell them all apart, so it is best to sometimes tread carefully (not something I have ever done well) and never say too much in public. You never know who is listening.

BuckinDC 18 Reviews 420 reads
posted
12 / 16

This is the obverse of "stick with well-reviewed providers." I don't mean to offend anyone, but I think that trolling "escort malls" is the hobby equivalent of "dumpster diving." You'll be able to find more than enough high-quality providers to keep you busy through P411 or the ads on your local TER board. You don't need to waste your time trolling on sites where many ads are TGTBT, or seeing a provider is TOFTT. That just throws temptation the little head's way.

I know that, for some guys, part of the charm of the hobby is the "thrill of the hunt," looking for that provider who is a "diamond in the rough," whose existence you either announce to the world or keep to yourself. I understand that. I also understand that many well-reviewed providers advertise on the "escort malls," as well as other places. Still, trolling "escort malls" is not a good use of a newbie's time or resources, IMHO.

Autumn Breeze See my TER Reviews 1636 reads
posted
13 / 16

From the ladies perpective I would recommend being respectful and following her instructions and lead. Providing references and or information to let her know that you are who you say that you are and that you are a true hobbyist.
Arrive on time and be be sure to have fresh breath...especially if you are a smoker and be nice and clean. Then of course be respectful of her time and end the session in a timely manner.
I also agree that you should only see well reviewed providers but if you must take your pants to the shower with you then you probably aren't seeing the right lady anyway. (leave the wallet in the car if you are unsure)
Just my two cents.

mrfisher 112 Reviews 405 reads
posted
14 / 16

The hobby is not a dating service, and you never have to go on with a date if it doesn't seem right to you.

What's the point if you're not going to enjoy it?

You will get "no call, no shows" and some gals will inexplicably drop you without notice and you'll never know why.

Just carry on with another.

Like golf, the hobby is much too important to ever take seriously.

inicky46 61 Reviews 545 reads
posted
15 / 16

Very good advice!  As a relative newbie I've stayed away from BP girls, for example, unless their ad has a link to TER as some touring providers will do.  Good luck!

Crazy Diamond 12 Reviews 825 reads
posted
16 / 16

Choose a well-reviewed lady who has been around for a while.  You will almost certainly be nervous the first few times you play, and it will probably be apparent to her.  She may be as well, so don't sweat that.  Make sure she is attractive enough for you, and if she posts on the boards, you will be able to get a sense of her personality.  That last is important in regards to "connecting" with her.  Lastly, be patient with her regarding screening.

Sounds like you have your bases covered in being able to effectively do your homework.  Time now for you to walk the walk.  Enjoy!

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