I am fairly new to the hobby and a bit confused. I researched the hobby for awhile, then joined P411 and TER.  I found a well reviewed provider and made an appointment request, she responded promptly, and accepted my request .  Day before the date I confirmed, next day I texted she replied back and date went perfectly.  Awesome communication and very organized.   Second date, another provider, sent appointment request, no reply for a few days.  I emailed her, she immediately reviewed my profile, accepted my date request, and apologized stating that my request went to her spam folder.  Anyways all communication after that was flawless as well as our date.

My third attempt was far from the charm and has me worried.  I picked out a fairly well reviewed provider, reviews said difficult to schedule, but the actual date ratings were very good. Figured I could be flexible, shouldn't be that hard (HA!).  So I send a date request,  no reply, so I emailed her.  immediate response.  She never checked my date request on P411, but we settled on a day and time.  Emailed her that day, she replied and stated she would text address and instructions 1/2 before date.  Took afternoon off from work, drove close to location and waited 1 hour past  appointment start time. I emailed stating I assume that something came up and she couldn't make it.  Two days later she responds, apologizes,  and wants to set up another date.  I figured she must have had a very good reason for blowing me off and I accept.  Following week she confirms date by email, says she will send address 1/2 hour before date.  I take afternoon off from work, stop and get the wine she likes, roses she likes, drive 45 minutes to her area.  A 1/2 hour before date she calls,  gives me instructions, and says she doesn't like to give address over phone and will text it.  I wait, and wait, an 1.5 hours go by.  I'm pretty pissed, but I remain calm, and politely text her and state; "I can see something else must have came up, I'm out and I do not want to reschedule".  Anyways, she was a "TOP LISTING" for P411.  When I inquired at P411 about this status, they stated the providers pay for this and is not one of their rankings.  

Was I just lucky the first two dates?   Does this happen often?    Is this some type of scam?  Honestly it really bothered me, I am a bit confused and its stopped me from pursuing other appointments.  

I hear that clients can get black listed, but what about providers that do these type of shenanigans?  I am moving on, but would still like to know.

Not too often in my experience, but the odds are it will happen to you (and did) at some point in your p4p experience.  It's one of the downsides of this so-called hobby, for both mongers and providers.  Most people are dependable; some aren't.  Don't let it stop you from making other appointments.  But if you continue in p4p and see different providers, odds are it will happen to you again and more than once.  This is one reason I tend to do mainly repeat visits with providers who not only provide exceptional service but are professional in every respect, including not even thinking about doing what that provider did to you.  

Since it happened twice with the same provider, you might want to post a report on your experience on your local board, to warn others. There's a risk in doing that in that the provider could try to retaliate in some way.  Or you could do as you said, just move on.

And as you found out, P411's "Top Listing"s have nothing to do with the quality of the provider.  Anyone who pays for it can be a Top Listing.

Unless you’re seeing an agency provider.  Independent run their business differently,  and as you now have experienced, some have their shit together and others not so much.

Many times when you read the review, you can get not only get an idea of how she is bcd, but also what type of business woman a provider is.

So you've had a success rate of .666 (we'll try not to ready anything sinister into that!)

Imagine the kind of money you could command in major league baseball with that kind of percentage -- you'd be the highest paid player of all time!

Point being, ALL of us strike out upon occasion -- don't obsess over it, learn the lesson (don't se THAT one) and move along. There are no shortage of women who are ready and willing to talk to you about some fun play time together. Find another one who can meet the day and time, communicates well and floats your boat.

Or go back to one of the other two providers and have another good session -- generally gets better beyond the first session.

Good luck!

You were just unlucky on your third date. As everyone else says it happens. At least it didn't happen on your first date, or first two, which may have soured you to the hobby, or towards providers in general. There are many flaky gals in this biz. It is not the majority of them (if you stick to well reviewed ladies) but you will encounter this occasionally.  You can post about her flaking on your regional board if you want. Other than that, be thankful your first two sessions went so well, move on and try again with another lady. Hopefully you have many more sessions like the first two. I am surprised you waited as long as you did. Many guys would have left a lot sooner after the no contact.  

Good luck in your future dates.

END OF MESSAGE

It's called NSNC (No Show No Call) & it happens in both directions.  Since she NSNC once, you were over optomistic that it wouldn't happen again.    
Knowing my schedule, I don't like gals who are difficult to schedule with...  since I live outside the city, I need more lead time than that.  I can work with directions to a nearby "callpoint".  Many gals work on a 2 call system.  (Or text)  Where she gives you a rough location... a cross roads or even a hotel. At the time, she gives you the exact location, apartment or room number.  

From the information you have provided, it seems you did nothing wrong.  I would move on.  

I have had it done to me & I wasted the opportunity waiting on her.  I'd not book with her now, not even if it was FREE.  Because it would be risking another opportunity on someone who didn't respect my time.      

That is just way to F in Funny.  

Nice Reply!

Been dazed and confused for so long it's not true
Wanted a woman, *never bargained for you*
Lots of people talk and few of them know
Soul of a woman was created below, yeah
You hurt and abused tellin' *all of your lies*
*Run around sweet baby*, Lord how they hypnotize
Sweet little baby *I don't know where you've been*
Gonna love you baby, *here I come again*
Every day I work so hard
Bringin' home my hard earned pay
Try to love you baby, but you push me away
*Don't know where you're goin'*
Only know just where you've been
Sweet little baby, *I want you again*
*Been dazed and confused for so long*, it's not true
Wanted a woman, never bargained for you
Take it easy baby, let them say what they will
Will your tongue wag so much when I send you the bill

Thanks for all the replies, very helpful.  Feeling better, Think I will schedule a date!

Since we are on the subject.  How long should I wait for a provider to respond on an initial contact?

How long should I wait for her to check references and respond with an appointment confirmation?

... "It depends."  

It depends on several factors, such as how far in advance you're asking for the date, the time of year (eg is it a holiday time), and your general patience level.

I almost never do same-day bookings, especially not for a first date (need to allow time for screening), and I usually schedule at least a week out, often more than a week as my availability windows are tight.  So for a first-time request, I allow a couple of days for a response, and if I haven't heard anything I'll send a follow up which lets her know if I haven't heard back in 24 hours I'll assume we won't be getting together. If no word then, I move on.  Once in awhile I'll get a delayed response to the effect they were busy with family etc.  Since I started using P411 I almost always get a response within 24 hours.  

Obviously if you're asking for a same-day booking or something within a day or two, you need a response more quickly than if you're booking several days to a few weeks out as I tend to do.  Just be clear in your communications re when your offer to get together expires.

As for how long to allow for checking references, that depends on whether the provider has to communicate with other providers and their availability.  In my experience that hasn't taken more than a day or two, and I've found that my P411 OKs cut that time to almost zero.

There is a fair amount of preparation on their end to get ready for a play date. It isn’t uncommon to get close to the date, and the provider says she needs another 10-15 minutes to get ready, but it’s not common for them to go MIA on the day of, or with in an hour of the play date. If for any reason you are not getting responses from her with in an hour of the scheduled date, there is a problem and you likely need to back out. If I am hosting incall and she has not communicated, I give it 15 minutes past the time the date was supposed to start. Then I back out.

some providers are better in the sack, some give better BBBJ's, and some are better with the business end of things. Be glad your first two experiences went well. If #3 had been first, you may have thrown in the towel.

...a mistake and meant to say out call but in case you didn't and since this is the Newbie Board I want to point out when the client (you in this case) hosts and the provider is coming to his place it's called an Out Call because she is going out of her place to the clients place.