so to all you experienced hobbyists out there, I'm very confused. I'm new to this - and am finding very quickly that you can't even secure a date without references, at least any dates that have a good rating on here, and are safe/well known. They all require two references. If you can't get a date to get references, how in the hell do you get a date? If someone could make a suggestion I'd be grateful :P Thanks.

Not having references should NOT be a reason for your situation. FOR ME....I have a list of things I do to screen a client...and the only difference between you and sayyyyyyyyy Mr. Fisher would be you have not seen anyone....which means more work for me.....but it is part of my JOB. I don't mind it at all. However, even with my excellence in customer service attitude.....you will have to be prepared to give up some detailed information.

What information are you giving your perspective providers’? If you are not willing to have yourself thoroughly screened....you will not be able to play with well established providers.

If you are forthcoming with your information and a provider refuses to see you because you don't have any references that is all her decision and her loss.

many top notch providers accept one or more of those verification sites. They will need to verify your identity and employment but do so discreetly, and (they say) destroy any records after you have been verified and assigned a user name.

Joining date-check really opened up a lot of opportunity to me when I was starting out on the right coast after returning from overseas....

I just confirmed a booking with a lady that  is on datecheck as well as myself. I think its best for all involved to be safe. by the way she is in another state and we booked for a fall session months away.  I am vouched on another board and ladies offer specials all the time for vouched clients. As I have said many times it beats collecting baseball cards......

I was very polite, with 2 providers, I sent emails, introducing myself, and giving a time/day I was interested in, and asking for their schedule, availability. Both responded with I need 2 references, please email them, and how the provider will remember you. I responded with I was sorry, but I had never done this before and had no references...and what else could I do. They both responded with sorry, you need 2 references, good luck. :P

I agree with the above.

If you use one of the sites above it helps the provider from the screening process if she doesn't want to do phone calls. It seems they should except a hobbyist that put some effort into himself pre screen with a well known board first then finding a provider second.

The same goes for Providers.

Anyone know which service is most heavily use in the Los Angeles or Orange County areas?