I wish I had known that DATY with an unknown SP poses a risk.

Given she asked if I was clean, used a condom, is 24, worked for 2 months part-time, n has plans to move out n live on her own, wat are the chances she passed along something to me especially HIV?

Your honest assessment would be appreciated here.

THanks,

"I wish I had known that DATY with an unknown SP poses a risk"
        Any contact with a SP, known or unknown, poses some degree of risk, as does any contact with a civvie.  As a general rule SP's get tested FAR more often that civvie girls.
"she asked if I was clean"
        Means less than nothing
"used a condom"
        For DATY??? Can't imagine how...
"is 24, worked for 2 months part-time"
        Ahhh, here's where you're in trouble!!  24 year old part timers are a HUGE risk for all manner of terrible things.  The only thing that would make it worse would be if she has plans to move out n live on her own.  THAT would bode very ill indeed.

OK, BS aside...
I'm no doctor, nor do I play one on TV...
I have personally never heard of anyone getting HIV from DATY, but certainly won't say it is impossible.  You can get chlamydia or gonorrhea that way, but again, the "chances" are something that even the "experts" don't agree on.
Personally, DATY followed by protected sex are not something that I would get concerned about, but that's me.

If in doubt, get tested.
This isn't a great place for medical advise (aside from the time-honored "get tested").  You can get many opinions here, most of them unbacked by any medical background (including mine).

You might try medhelp or something like it for your medical questions, and here for your hobby questions.

Oh yea, if you have any reason to be concerned, get tested...

-- Modified on 9/5/2006 9:48:23 PM

So this begs the question:  is there a 'safe' way to do DATY similiar to CBJ?

Yes, I think BBBJ is *much* better as is BB-DATY.  Touching with fingers, arms, face, nose, etc and smelling but WITHOUT the (oh so sweet) tasting is my comfort level right now.

dental dams
think Saran Wrap, only latex...

care explaining how 24 part-timers are a huge risk...i do regret doing the uncovered DATY

i'm definitely getting tested , any more words of advice

Absolutely.

1. Read the Newbie forum, starting with page one and going back about six months.  You will finds tons of information, links, and previous discussions about hobbying risks, std's, testing, and other topics of interest to newcomers.

2. If that doesn't help relieve your anxiety, then quit before you give yourself a heart attack or otherwise worry yourself to death.  This hobby isn't for everybody...

My advice is to consider becoming a numismatist. Failing that, perhaps becoming a philatelist would be appropriate.

Thanks for making me pull out my dictionary- LOL.

First, all that licking gets ya thinking about other oral activities...and hen ya realise that stamps are cold, and flat, and don't taste nearly as good as other lickable options....

Then when you are getting all worked up about the licking and your mind starts to drift as ya lick the stamps...you get over exuberant...next thing ya know paper cut on the tongue.

Now ya got an open wound in your mouth....now ya can't have fun licking those better lickables.

Just say no to stamp collecting.

Webbie,

Thank you so much for setting me straight. I had no idea that philatelistry was fraught with such peril!

philately, not philatelistry.

Now -- say that five times fast, and there's another reason that WebTerrorist missed on why stamp collecting is dangerous

"care explaining how 24 part-timers are a huge risk..."

OK, that part was just me having a bit of fun at your expense, no harm meant.
Personally, I would not consider covered DATY, that's just licking a balloon...

It is general agreed that the risk of HIV transmission is substantially less for DATY than that for unprotected intercourse. Studies have indicated the rate of HIV transmission per unprotected coital act with an HIV+ partner to be about 1 to 8 per 1000. The HIV prevalence in the 15-49 year old US population is about 7/1000. For the sake of argument and ease of calculation let take the pessimistic view and assume the risk of DATY is at the high end of that for BBFS (8/1000) and HIV prevalence is higher (1/100 rather than 7/1000) than in the general population. This results in the risk of getting HIV from one DATY event is substantially less than 8/100000. I suspect the risk of getting STDs other than HIV are higher because of theirs higher transmission rate and much greater prevalence in the sexual active population.  However remember just because the risk is low does not mean it can’t be realized on the first attempt.  The only way to insure you won’t realize a risk is not to take that risk.

-- Modified on 9/8/2006 4:52:31 PM

The risk of a man catching AIDS from sexual activity with a woman is so close to zero, it may have never happened. AIDS is a disease transmitted primarily from the insertive partner to the receptive partner during anal sex, and secondarily from men to women via vaginal intercourse. You'd be surprised how many men have had gay sex but would rather die than admit it, to anyone.

In other words, if you are male and you haven't been getting screwed in the butt by gay men or IV drug addicts, you don't have AIDS. You'd think after 25 years of the hype we'd all have caught on. And if you're a hobbyist, you already have herpes, and so does every provider you frequent.

Jadie's statistical approach makes a lot of sense.  In making an informed decision about what risks are worth taking (and what risks are NOT worth taking), the only rational approach is to look at the statistical risk.  Of course, sexual activities produce a risk of getting an STD.  The trick is finding information that will enable the degree of risk to be assessed.  Jadie's post attempts to do just that.  Does anyone know where meaningful statistical information about STDs may be obtained?  I have seen the SF clinic site which characterizes some risks as "high" or "low" but I don't recall definitions of these categories.  For a Newbie (or anyone else) to make an intelligent decision, statistical information would sure help.  Does anyone know where such info can be found?

In almost all sexual activity the woman (in heterosexual sex) is at a SIGNIFICANTLY higher risk of catching anything.
I agree with the person who said this hobby isn't for the faint of heart. There are risks in all that we do. Most *responsible* women here know this and value themselves enough to take care of their body and get tested frequently.

The information you are seeking often has to be inferred, deduces and synthesize from other available data.  The CDC does report annually the number of new STD cases and one source of this information with inferences and deductions I recommend can be found at the following site: http://www.avert.org/stdstatisticusa.htm. With respect to original post about the risk of DATY in this thread it should be realized that only 20-30% of 40,000 new HIV cases in 2004 are attributes to heterosexual contact with the remainder attributed to men to men sex and IV drug use.  No cases were attributed to female to female sex suggesting that although there is a theoretical risk for DATY, it must be very low.  This risk can be further reduce by maintaining good oral heath (no gingivitis), not brushing and flossing shortly before participating and avoid the practice when you have any mouth sores or when your partners is menstruation or spotting (all just common sense).

“In almost all sexual activity the woman (in heterosexual sex) is at a SIGNIFICANTLY higher risk of catching anything. “

This is supported by the fact that with the exception of syphilis women have a disproportion higher rate of STD infections.  For example in 2003 of the 13260 new cases of HIV attribute to heterosexual contact, 8127 were females and 5133 were males

“Most *responsible* women here know this and value themselves enough to take care of their body and get tested frequently.”

ALL things being equal “responsible women here” WILL have and present a lower risk per heterosexual contact.  This advantage will however be negated if “responsible women here” take that risk much more often with more different partners than the assumed less responsible women. Also how frequent one get tested may not be as important as the number of sexual contacts between testing. A lady who gets tested ever three months and has 100 sexual contacts in that interval is probably at the same risk of getting infected as spreading the infection as the lady who get tested annually and also has 100 sexually contacts in that year.

Read it if you must, but I would strongly advise seeking information from more reliable sources than MikeThePig.

The rate of HIV transmission per unprotected coital act with an HIV+ partner is estimated to be about 1 to 8 per 1000.  However the risk is estimated to be as high a 1/50 (risk associated with deep needle stick injuries and male to male sex) during the acute infection phase when viral loads are high.  This phase last 1-3 weeks after HIV transmission and usually before HIV infection has been diagnosed. Co-infection with other STDs will also further increase the HIV transmission risk. It is believe that as much as 50% of all HIV transmission occurs during the acute phase.

You risk freaking yourself out. If you are scared to do something why did you? It gets better, take it easy and have some fun. You will eventually want to take the training wheels off and as you are sliding down that flat bellied SP heading toward that sweet lucious mound of woman flesh just don't think about the week she just spent at the convention center in Vegas. Besides all those guys were clean. Listen man, there are risks out here. Do you drive? ride a bike? swim? How do you know your wife or GF isn't doing the gardener or her old college sweetheart? Relax, have fun but just don't do things until you are ready. The SP is there for you. Pay her, be a gentleman and engage in what you and she can agree on.

if i cant lick it, i dont get turned on enough to stick it