I haven't yet posted any newb questions and risk the "here's your sign" moment...so, here goes nothing...

First, the newb checklist:
1) VIP TER: check
2) read reviews, research, go with well-reviewed ladies, etc: check
3) join a verification service like p411: check (in progress)

My question is about the ladies' contact forms on their web sites.  Before anyone questions my intent...I am not debating or asking for another way to become verified/screened.  I am 100% behind screening/verification, the ladies' prerogative to screen/verify in a manner suitable to their own standards, and, should I choose to engage a lady for a date, I will willingly acquiesce to her standards.

My focus is more about how screening/verification information is shared with the ladies to facilitate the process.  I've been making a list of potentials and doing my research.  Many of the ladies request that their contact form on site be filled out before they will begin their screening process/consider a date.  I work in a web tracking focused industry and both incompetent and competent web hosts give me cause for concern.  I have fairly intimate knowledge about how these systems work behind the scenes.  Having any of my real info floating out there on random web servers makes me nervous.

So...a few questions on the topic:

1) Do ladies expect and guys provide their "real" info in these contact forms (specifically, real name)?

2) If a guy provided accurate screening services (p411, datecheck, etc), accurate contact info (hobby email, hobby phone, ter handle, etc), and, if possible, other provider references, would that be enough for most ladies? (especially if any other requested data was willingly provided via phone, etc)

3) For ladies that communicate a rigid requirement (this form must be filled out, etc)...do you accept the same info over the phone to be written down, etc?  If not...why is the contact form a rigid requirement for you?

At the end of the day, when I get ready to pull the trigger...I'll of course ask the lady in question as that's the only opinion that matters.  For those that look into my history...yes, I've posted a few reviews.  I've hobbied in places where the practice is legal up to this point.  The screening piece was not really a factor for those occasions.

I'm just trying to get a feel for how rigid most take the language on various provider web sites.  In other words, maybe that language is a convention brought about by these website templates and is not really as rigid as it appears...ladies will screen and see guys as long as we are willing to pony up appropriate details in some manner.  I don't want to waste anyone's time as I'm sure the ladies deal with that constantly.  I want to be safe without being more of a pain in the ass than is necessary to protect both of us

Thanks for reading and hopefully this is received as a halfway decent newb question!

Put your refs, TER handle, P411, etc. but there is no need to tell me your life's history before knowing if we can even meet. I kindly ask that you let me know some way that you have refs or will be providing info. so I know you're not a time waster, but I even say flat out "You don't have to provide personal info. until I respond."

I think you raise many good points about discretion and time wasted. Just put whatever you think is relevant so the provider does not ignore your email, UNLESS she specifically requires personal info. in addition to references. Some ladies don't care if you have 100 reviews and can shoot fireworks out of your ass...they want the info. In those cases, find out if she is available for the date you want, and THEN provide what is requested, or move on if you're not comfortable.

Great post for the Newbies.

-- Modified on 2/22/2013 1:03:59 AM

First, you are right to wonder about web form data.  Many people bypass them and send select info via email. If the info in the email is less than the lady needs, she will either ignore you or ask for more.

Many smaller ISPs have been acquired or disappeared and web hosting services come in different flavors.  Form data may end up their servers and be accessible to ... who knows? The webmaster might be some 20-something with kid brothers or sisters who can access the accounts. A smaller operator might not have the legal wherewithal to protect client info from inquiring LE.

Although email headers can contain info about the sending host, route, etc., I tend to be more trusting of the MAJOR email places like gmail, hotmail, yahoo, etc.. They have legal obligations to protect private info and they have more to lose if they leak info via outside hackers or via insider (employee) hacking.

Some providers have posted that the form data goes straight to their email ... but that is only after being processed by the server.

I recommend to avoid web forms and use her email to send whatever info you are comfortable sending (P411 or Date-Check ID) and do not EVER send anything you are not comfortable sending (name, SSN, CC numbers, etc.).

...send the info requested on the form by e-mail. Most providers (note Meena's reply) will accept you e-mailed info. Most state that on their site. If they are adamant about the form it's up to you then what to do next.

I actually did agree with you, with only one variation. If I am NOT available on the date he wants, what good is his info. going to do? He basically sent it for nothing if I can't see him.  Now, his info. is given to yet another provider, who can't even meet him...pointless.

I expect references to be in that first email or some explanation like, "I am willing to provide my employment info." but want to know if you can even see me, before doing so." This has always been the biggest complaint I have heard from guys about screening forms, or having to send info. when the provider can't even take 3 seconds to say, "I am not available." That lets me know he is serious and we can proceed. I don't mind 2 emails, which is a far cry from the back and forth of tooth pulling for info.

-- Modified on 2/22/2013 10:56:09 AM

Too many ladies have a form email to exchange basic info like if they are available or not for a certain date. Some websites make you fill out 8, 9, 10 required fields just to find out if Escort Edna is available next Friday at 8. Sometimes we just have a quick question and dont have all day to fill out a lengthy email form with a bunch of required fields. And certainly any newbie girl should give greater access for contacts as oppossed to a Top 100 nationwide girl where many guys will go thru the hassle to meet a girl like that.

Agreed, and try getting a reference from a provider who demands all that shit. I just tell the guy to give me one I can contact without having to answer 12 million questions about booking a date, when I am not even a freaking dude! I know a few providers where the site FORCES you to join the mailing list, or it won't even send your info to her. That's retarded. It should be an option, not a must.

The appointment request we receive includes much of your relevant info (your first name, sometimes your last name if you include it there, your email address, sometimes your phone number, and how many provider okays you have, if any), and is emailed directly to us.  We can then follow up with you if we need anything more.  

I would do that before filling out a form or sending an email.  But if the girl is not on P411, then most will accept an email in lieu of the form.

-- Modified on 2/22/2013 4:34:56 PM

I agree with London here, but I figured out a way around that, or one that very often works. I look her up on DC or P411, and her email is usually there. And of course, P411 has the PM option as well.