But you run the risk of finding out how much your "friendship" is really worth to her. Honestly, you need to understand that the money is most likely the reason you two are "hitting it off" so well.

Still, she should cut you a better deal if you don't expect her to stay with you for overnights.

by suggesting any OTC time.

You can, of course, say that you can only afford to see her for X amount of time, and she can, of course, suggest that you spend more time together without the extra compensation.; but never expect it to be that way.


That's how these things are done successfully, and despite what you hear, it is rare to get OTC time.

I'm relatively new at this so figure it would be a good question for the newbie board.  I've only seen  a few providers, but I've seen one in particular  several times.  We really hit it off and I really like her.  In addition, we communicate frequently and know each others personal info.  One of the times I saw her we spent a weekend together in the city and it was awesome.  It also cost me 10k plus expenses.  No big deal however...I was expecting that.  She would like me to come visit her for a few days and she lives several hours away from me.  I would love to see her again.  So here's my question:  Would it be offensive or wrong in somke way for me to suggest that I come visit and only pay for 4 hours or so for sex each eveing instead of 5k per day?  We would still be spending the whole weekend together and as I see it we would be friends spending time together.  There are some nice providers in my hometown so I don't need to travel and spend that kind of $ to get laid, but I would like to see her because of our"supposed" friendship.  Maybe she only wants me to visit to pick up another 10k.  Any thoughts or suggestions?

As a newbie I fear you will realize about a year from now that you should NEVER have paid that type of coin for a weekend "date".  If indeed you "know" this gal so well, you would have known that she is, or should I suggest, wide open on "negotiating" those types of dates.  And if she isn't, you should simply find one that is...and most are!

While you can do a search here and read up on "negotiating fees" you will find that there are those who would absolutely NEVER consider it, those that find it part of the game and WILL always do so, and those that will dabble in it, particularly in this type of "date".  I consider myself in the last bucket, and would absolutely suggest an arrangement with this gal!

Remember, this is YOUR money and you can decide which way and on whom to spend it on.  For this example, if your gal pal charges XXX/hr, suggest to her that you are interested in paying XXXX for those couple of days.  And how you arrive at your "offer" is the same method that ANY of the gals arrive at their fees.  You don't IMHO need to justify how you got there.  And then it is up to her to either accept your offer, or reject it.  Frankly, if she has nothing else going on, she'll accept it and tell you "it's only because you're so special that I'm giving you this discount".  OTOH if she has firm dates she'll tell you to "get lost and never call her again".  No issues however, there are plenty of ladies out there who are VERY hungry and would definitely entertain your offers.

Just remember, as long as the bucks are in your pocket you get to make the calls.  And if you don't ask, she won't offer...in all probability.

Now you can read the other replies who will tell you that you should NEVER negotiate a lady's fees.

probably give you a taste of reality between hobby friendship and friendship.  I wish you the best of luck.

she is expecting another 10k from you and she will be very disappointed to hear your alternative proposal. This is a good way to find out if you have a legitimate friendship with benefits (financial & sexual) or if it's strictly business for her.

Let us know how it turns out!

and things worked out very very well for me.  And are continuing to evolve.

This is the dilemma the OP is having.  However he has only seen her a couple of times while spending some very serious dollars along the way.  Now he seems to be at a junction that he is questioning the "value" of the out and about time.

As you suggest, his best bet is to let it be HER idea.  But he will need to put it out there in some manner, and be prepared to move on if she still only sees him as an ATM, which is a very high possibility.  In my case I had already come to that realization and had decided that I would NO longer pay for out and about time.  But if the gal wanted to continue the "relationship" as it was (and in my case I was a rather substantial portion of her annual income...and based on the OP he is also headed in that direction), she would need to come to an "arrangement".

What the OP needs to determine is his willingness to just see her BCD..pay the hourly rates and go and have lunch/dinner with his pals for free.  That was the part of this game that I had to come to grips with, and decided that was the "best" route for me.  But not everyone can easily determine if that is the best route for them, as they fear that the gal is the ONE and they don't want to risk "losing" her.

But I also applied this same approach to every gal I have seen since last year, and more often than not the gals are very amenable to OTC.  But I have no problems in asking a gal out...just not on my dime!  But it took me a year to learn the tricks of this "hobby", and I suspect the OP has to learn on his own accord.

I did so with a Fav...  who I continue to see.  She is a FBSM specialist but offers extras.  There always has been an understanding that the extras earned her an unspecified tip.  (For the record, I do not feel this is an up-sell but rather an upgrade in service level with appropriate increase in cost.)  Initially, I required extra time as well as extra services desired & I gifted the same as I would any other FS provider.  Now, she expects the same when ever she sees me.  

She was my firsrt successful liason & I still see her from time to time.  We have become friendly-aquaintances over the years.  The play session can vary but is now about an hour.  We often spend additional time together...  she has cooked for me or I have brought a snack or meal or we have done pot-luck.   Any extra time is OTC.  

Another Fav, again of several years, our play is the agreed upon hour but it's not unusual for us to spend another hour or 2 hanging out if she is slow.  

If a lady has a lot of travel involved or is passing up other clients to see you, she's going to want to cover that.  IMHO, you are way overpaying for what you are getting.  
H

When you say "she'd like me to come visit her for a few days" did she intiate the contact and the request?  If so, then without knowing anything about her, I'd say she's viewing you as an ATM.

I've never hobbied at that type of donation rate, so maybe things are a little different, but I doubt it,
go ahead and ask, what do you got to loose. Trust me when I say this, there'll be another escort that comes along and will rock your world.  You're still experiencing the "fog" of being a newbie.  Once you get your sea legs, you'll look back at this experience and say to yourself "WTF was I thinking". Good luck!    

Here's what you have to also ask yourself. You only want to pay her for 4hrs/day for the "activities", as the rest of the time, you will only be spending it as "friends". So, in reality, if she is not booked for the whole weekend with you, would you be opposed to her setting up other dates during that time period? When my "friends" come to visit, I still work, but when I am "booked" with a client, my phone ringer gets turned off & I see no one else.

the other guy in a MFM scene and make a few bucks for himself

Hey...it could happen

Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year sweetie

the phone waiting for it to ring.

willing to pay.  If a lady charges $300 an hour, she will not charge $3600 for a 12- hr. date; at least if she does, I doubt she is getting any business at that rate for a 12-hr. overnight.

Yes, of course, but you are thinking like a logical male. Female brain doesn't work that way. Her interpretation probably will be:  "He gave me 10k last time and only 3k this time?! WTF?!!"

You aren't looking for a 'friendship' with her. You are falling for her and you want to believe she is falling for you as well. If you did just want friendship you would say yes, she can book other clients while I'm there since I didn't book the entire weekend.

Good luck, please let us know what happens. I for one an really curious.

Goog point NN.  I hadn't thought of it quite like that.  I guess I want to know if there really is a friendship.  If I'm just an ATM, then I'll stay home and spend my dollars more wisely.  I'll take the risk of pissing her off.  There's a lot of providers who would like my money if that's the only thing that matters.  She's also been the benificiary of some fairly pricey gifts as well.  

A very simple way to find out if there is a "friendship" here is give her a holler to just hang out with NO envelope...and forget the gift giving as well.

What you need to understand is this is NOT the place to find romance.  There are sites out there with gals who are indeed seeking that type of relationship.  The ladies here are making a living...plain and simple.  And once you are NO longer contributing to their living, the faux relationship (romance) is summarily OVER.

But perhaps you can be the guy who will turn all of this around, not that others haven't tried.  And you can read their stories over and over.  

Good luck on which ever way you decide to go.

Merry Christmas to all!