After contacting a provider and discussing rates etc., I know it is not appropriate to ask about specific services provided, but would it be appropriate to ask if she spoke my home language of greek?
read her reviews and her web site/ads, etc... to know what she offers.
Talking about a sexual act is just not wise, unless you are both there together and naked.
Some might say that once you are screened, you can discuss such things discretely... but cops and prosecutors know what the "code words" mean as well as you do, and can easily use them against you. "Code words" offer zero protection.
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