Newbie - FAQ

Bad idea
panda_bear 5 Reviews 1803 reads
posted

As Bush 41 said: "Wouldn't be prudent". You should definitely ask the question on The Erotic Highway board.

My 2 cents:

If you did it, and then you got married to her, how do you think that would make her feel? It is one thing to come into the relationship more experienced, it is another to gain the experience with someone else while you are in a relationship.

Psychologists say that Sex short-circuits the normal development of a relationship. I have no idea if oral sex only half short-circuits it.

Enjoy the oral sex while you can. You know the joke about the wife getting married so she can stop giving BJ's.

You two have different pre-marriage sexual expectations. At least it the immediate problem is not expected to extend into marriage. Enjoy the relationship for what it is. Learn what you can from it. If you do get married, it shows character the trial you endured. If you don't get married to her, then at least you enjoyed free BJ's.

Since you know that she is saving vaginal sex for marriage, it seems like you have had talks with her. I suggest having even more deeper talks. What are her's and your expectations for sex after marriage? Plain vanilla? No more BJ's? Adventurous? Any fetishes? Greece? How does she feel about sexy lingerie? Trashy lingerie? Costumes? How do you feel about them? Only in the bedroom with the lights off? These are areas that potentially have long-term implications.

gewky3479 reads

hi, i suppose i should give a little background on myself.  i am 20 years old with my first gf, and i am still a virgin.  although me and my gf have oral sex frequently, we havent had vaginal intercourse.  i am really getting quite anxious to experience the feeling and she said that she doesnt want to have sex until she is married which i completely understand, but at the same time i feel like sex would elevate our relationship to a higher level but i am sort of embarrassed to tell her that.

so i suppose i am considering seeking a provider so that i can experience everything...

any comments, insight, people who have had similiar situations as me are very welcome.

thanks

shudaknownbetter3551 reads

Intercourse is great...  but all sex runs the risk of unexpected emotions.  Personally, I think this is something to not be taken lightly.  Part of the joy of a new love or a marriage is the joy of discovery...  of exploring the positions & angles that create feelings.  
On the otherhand, a lot of civie girls use sex to attract a guy or to get the baby they feel they want...  and other wise sex is off the table.  
You've got to look into yourself & decide what you want.
skb

and talk openly about your relationship with your girlfriend. Using the hobby now to avoid honesty in your 'real' relationships will lead to some bad habits in the future.

Many - many young men have found to be in your position.  You must make a decision that you can live with forever!  If you decide to seek out a provider and go - that will always be in the back of your mind. No going back - sort of speak!  I also realize that at your age sex is only on your mind about 99.9% of your waking time - if you were like me.  I think what us older guys say is " young and dumb and full of cum "  But seriously think long with the big head before you take the leap.  Good Luck.

I don't think it would be wise to make the decision before you've even talked to your girlfriend about how eager you are to have sex.  That would be completely inconsiderate.  You don't have to tell her you're looking into seeing a provider; that would make her feel insecure and make you look like you're pressuring her.  

Maybe post on the Erotic Highway.  Love Goddess is good at this kind of thing.

Very few ladies will see a young guy your age.  Ladies prefer more mature men who will treat them like the lady they are.

As Bush 41 said: "Wouldn't be prudent". You should definitely ask the question on The Erotic Highway board.

My 2 cents:

If you did it, and then you got married to her, how do you think that would make her feel? It is one thing to come into the relationship more experienced, it is another to gain the experience with someone else while you are in a relationship.

Psychologists say that Sex short-circuits the normal development of a relationship. I have no idea if oral sex only half short-circuits it.

Enjoy the oral sex while you can. You know the joke about the wife getting married so she can stop giving BJ's.

You two have different pre-marriage sexual expectations. At least it the immediate problem is not expected to extend into marriage. Enjoy the relationship for what it is. Learn what you can from it. If you do get married, it shows character the trial you endured. If you don't get married to her, then at least you enjoyed free BJ's.

Since you know that she is saving vaginal sex for marriage, it seems like you have had talks with her. I suggest having even more deeper talks. What are her's and your expectations for sex after marriage? Plain vanilla? No more BJ's? Adventurous? Any fetishes? Greece? How does she feel about sexy lingerie? Trashy lingerie? Costumes? How do you feel about them? Only in the bedroom with the lights off? These are areas that potentially have long-term implications.

I could bore you with my story, very similar to yours but I won’t. I’ll simply say that providers will always be there for you. This opportunity will not. I am very happy to say my wife will always be my first and last although there are some providers in between. You don’t say if you have asked her to marry you yet? I will tell you from my experience that once we were totally committed to each other after marriage became after the first five minutes we were alone together. Your situation may be different but I encourage you to wait and if she is the one you will have some very special experiences ahead of you! Does anyone have plans for a time machine? I’d love to go back to those days ; )

Register Now!