Obviously they will not want to spend inordinate amounts of money.

I think it is a very nice gesture to give a bit of added compensation to gals who do this.

The gal's site should say what is the best way to reach her.

Many gals will also do a strip tease.  Some obviously are better than others at this.

Some will ask you about that once she has decided to see you.  That is the appropriate time to ask.

As for stripteases, you are correct that you should wait until you are actually with her before asking.  Have fun!

Part of the fantasy

I will ask a lady to dress a particular way for me prior to my visit.  I find it erotic to have the lady open the door dressed the way I like.  In my case however, I prefer the classy look (nice dresses or outfits) rather than a more slutty look.  However, you should ask her to accomodate your visuals, and I would be surprised if any lady told you no.  Assuming she has the attire you prefer, many ladies do like to dress up for clients.  All you have to do is ask!

But i'd rather before I even get to my incall someone let me know because if I don't get the heads up i'm not bringing 5 different pairs of heels and boots and schoolgirl outfits etc

ask a gentleman if he has any clothing preference once I have gotten the screening out of the way.I have found some gentleman that are surprised that I ask.So,the answer to your question is yes,it is acceptable to ask prior to meeting.If you do not ask how is the lady to know you want her to wear something specific.I had a gentleman ask specifically for thigh highs and heels.Which ever form of communication you have been using to contact her would be the method to convey to her your request.Also,strip-tease depends on if she offers this,I love strip-tease very erotic and teasing before the good part!

need to purchase the item for her to wear.  For example, all ladies do not have a yellow poka dot bikini.

WAIT until she asks you. I normally ask the gent what he would like to see me in prior to our meeting. As for the strip tease, let her know after the appointment but before the action. Have pleasurable time!