I am a newbie and made my choice of a provider based on the reviews that she received. Bad or good, I read these to get a general picture of what to expect. Recently I have given a bad review to a provider (I don't think it was bad), but obviously she was pissed enough to send back a message telling me that she is blacklisting me .
This is a business based on service, just like in a restaurant. The level of service is based on personal perception and everybody is different. So why would I be subjected to a retaliation? Isn't this the idea of a fair review? When I looked at the Yelp reviews of a restaurant, I see bad and good reviews mixed in,but this at least gives me a fair idea of what to look for. SO why is this game playing differently ? Looking to understand .
You're right to be confused about the reaction. I'm sure it was out of anger, because it does hurt when someone says something negative about you.. especially because it's about a person and not a business establishment where blame can be transferred from one person to another and everyone can simply deny responsibility.
Another thing to remember is everyone perceives everything differently. There is no such thing as "one right answer". She probably thought her service was X when you thought it was Y.
I don't know what you said in the review so I can't tell you if what you said was out of logic and fact or if it was done out of spite and malice, but you can say what you want. You're an adult.
She is abusing the privilege to black list someone when she threatens to use same for something like a bad review (Which your review is not, but that's another kettle of fish.)
I'm not sure if TER can do much but I'd like to see TER delist providers who do this kind of thing. It really impairs the ability of reviewers to be honest, and that's what this whole site needs to be about if it is to be successful.
She also impairs the ability of other gals to trust black list sites (Which should be used against dangerous clients, not just annoying ones.), and that can have even worse implications.
Finally, she is only shooting herself in the foot as what she is doing will get out and other clients will know to stay away from her.
Thanks for airing this issue here.
The national blacklist has a variety of reasons to add a gent or fake provider etc. Approximately 15 choices to check off.....time wasting, too many calls/emails, no call no show, inappropriate content of emails, fake screening info, bad reviews unjustified is a choice on the drop down. Then all the way on the other spectrum to stalker, rape, unsafe practices etc. I reference the blacklist sites with every single screening. Personally I think threatening to add a gents name to blacklist for a bad review is not right.....same thing as the gents that post bad reviews because they don't pass screening. Either way feels like extortion. Difference is the gents have greater control on TER reviews vs ladies have control on the blacklist. Bad apples no matter where we roam that will misuse both. If your review was honest....doesn't have to agree with any others. Beauty is subjective as is performance. So if you were unhappy and writing honestly that provider has zero right to fire an email at you with threats. No on the flip side....if you may be documenting something that is not correct intentionally then that is a valid drop down on the blacklist. So not only for quote dangerous men....many choices so the provider may feel justified due to choices available on blacklist. Personally I think if you honestly met a gal and she did what was expected per reviews and you feel significantly lower number than others perhaps it was a chemistry thing. She should either move on or report to TER if she feels unwarranted. Blacklist use for bad reviews is supposed to be when a gent writes bum review for retaliation...not honest feelings. If you were not accurate however and she feels retaliation than that is exactly what the blacklist wants to know.
If she blacklists you(on a standard blacklist site, she does have to put some sort of reason down. If she does stick with the 'bad reviewer', a provider who finds it will ask her specifics, and may see you anyways. Or she can just be putting you on her own personal blacklist, meaning she will never see you again and will not provide a reference. (not as much of a big deal) I'd be more wary if you have an account on one of the big verification sites, because she can put down DO NOT SEE and doesn't necessarily need a reason. And you'll never know unless you have a provider friend, since they, for good reasons, don't allow you to see that. Your best option is to be upfront when trying to book with your next provider and warn her that you may be be blacklisted over a less than favorable review. (and I'd link her to this thread, and the review, if possible)
sounds like you're blaming her because you either could not get it up, or could not keep it up. Out of 3 pages of reviews, you are the only one who gave her that low of a score in service...looks are subjective. She can't blacklist you for a bad review unless of course, you're full of shit. I mean she CAN, but she is not supposed to. You have zero white lists and no offense, but you're shopping for bargain basement rates in freaking Orange County! Girls in the deep south make more than that.
Strange, I am going back and re-read my review and did not think it was bad. If it was, I would probably write it so. In my conclusion ,I did say I wanted to see her again . Over 3 pages of good reviews, I don't think that a low score is significant to her. If others read at my other reviews, I tend to be conservative so would understand my reasoning. If she has not made a big deal, I would probably come back to see her again, just to make sure that it was a fluke, maybe it was my off day or her off day. WHo knows.
We now have some idea how she may have received her higher scores.
I would like to hear her side, actually before I make up my mind lol. IF he has proof of this threat, he should send it to TER admin. I would also have advised using an alias, because now the entire world knows, which is a bit tacky if he is the one lying, and just trying to ruin her business. Stranger things have happened than a guy making threats for bad review if the provider does not do what he wants. Correct me if I am wrong, but don't ALL of her other reviews say there was both kissing and a great bbbj?
Your review (if I have the right one) states that she wasn't kissing you very well (no tongue), any possibility you have a breath problem? If she is a kisser with everyone else, why then not with you?
I used to work with a guy who had HORRIBLE breath, even when you weren't working right next to him. I don't think he realized it.
She should not blacklist you for the below average review, and if she had a problem with kissing you during the session, she should have let you know (gently) that there was a problem.
I once gave a provider a very good review, 8/9 but made a pretty innocent remark in the review, not at all critical, and she sent me a pretty nasty email, some providers just can't handle ANY criticism, constructive or not.
No way to tell for sure, good luck in the future.
Absolutely correct. We don't know her side or even if she actually blacklisted the dude. But if she did threaten him, it seems like a bit of an overreaction given her scores in other reviews - which makes the other reviews a teensy weensy suspect . . . But I will admit it is all speculation.
It's on the low side of her range but I EXPECT a +/-1 range in this intensely individual experience. I would not be in the slightest hesitant to see her over this.
I watch for WIDE jumps in rankings, ever mindful that you can't please everyone 100% of the time. I'd be wary but if there were a number of good reviews, I'd overlook a single out of range review. Sometimes a low review will reveal that it's as much him as her...
What will dissuade me is repeated wide jumps without satisfactory explanation. Say reviews in the 7-8-9 range then a fall to the 2-3-4 area. Repeatedly. Something is wrong in this scenario. Either the high reviews are bogus... or she does not click with some (ie, not her type), and performance suffers. (And face it, my super stud days... such as they were... are long behind me.)
The review scores are only part of the research process... starts with TER: Does she provide the services she advertises. Are the pictures real & a good representation? Compared to the review text.
The number index is only a very rough scale... and sometimes deceptive. I really do read most of her recent reviews as part of my decision process, prior to booking.
I think a provider obsessing over a 'high' number score is a huge mistake. In my view, a provider has control of most of the factors of both her profile & reviews. My cut off is 7/7. Reviews are after action reports... if I had a good time, I'd have a hard time giving less than a 7/7... I expect that others feel the same. Anything higher is a bonus, but not a deal breaker. But again, I read the text & value it more.
-- Modified on 8/28/2013 8:26:32 PM
i reserve blacklisting for serious issues like safety rip offs and health issues.
the rest like assholes timewasters and ppl i choose to not see again or at all are simply Dns
if its fake or hes unclean or hes gross or abussive or he tried bb she has every right to blacklist him
you cant try and use ter as leverage to try and manipulate women wn to not blacklist someone.
that in itself is pushing her around.
there are two sides to every story and if they start delisting women who use the black list what the hells next.
They will do it if a guy has an email from said provider saying, "If you don't give me a better score, I am going to tell your wife, your boss, etc." I had a friend who had to go through that in Ohio, but he had the proof.
Was your bad review honest or were you pissed off about something else? Perhaps the two of you didn't hit it off, she had a hard time pretending to like you, you got offended and retaliated against HER by writing a bad review? Did your review entail legitimate flaws with her service or were you simply criticizing her about nonsense? The fact is, a guy should not be blacklisted for writing a bad review IF the review was honest. Sure she can refuse to see you but that should be as far as her actions go otherwise she is unstable! If your review is the only negative review she has, then YOU like you have the problem. Vindictive behavior & fibs can come from both ends. I have to wonder if she blacklisted you for reasons you are not being honest about.
This is a business based on service, just like in a restaurant. The level of service is based on personal perception and everybody is different. So why would I be subjected to a retaliation? Isn't this the idea of a fair review? When I looked at the Yelp reviews of a restaurant, I see bad and good reviews mixed in,but this at least gives me a fair idea of what to look for. SO why is this game playing differently ? Looking to understand .