If you fill out the form on a provider's website for a request to see her, provide all of the screening and references required, and submit, why do many not reply? It's frustrating to not know if the form was submitted, or if the provider doesn't want to see you (knowing why would be nice).

Why don't those who don't want to see a guy at least send a polite reply declining him?

Because to be quite honest, we don't want to deal with the repercussions of that. I do not know exactly what is the reason in your case but, I usually don't get back to those who:
a) Send something very explicit on the form
b)  Are blacklisted
c) Give me references from Backpage or have no references
d) Too young  

I don't want to sound snobby, please don't misinterpret me, each of us have our boundaries. Tons of psychos out there who won't stop sending us emails if we decline. It is mentally consuming to read endless emails from those who don't understand how we do things here. Give yourself a time frame and if she doesn't respond within that time don't take it personal..tons of ladies to choose from

It's "none of the above". Nothing explicit (no talk about anything sexual at all), no blacklisting (just was approved by another provider who said references were good), and not young. One form didn't ask about age.

I don't know what sort of information is given from the referring provider to the one asking for reference, so maybe that's a factor. Don't know how, though

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There are two schools (I'm sure someone could come up with more if they tried) of thought on those. One school says, I will not fill out the form on her site no matter what. I don't know where it goes and it could be there forever. It might be a trail I don't want to leave.

One school says, I will fill out the form, it's no big deal. After all I want to see her and this is what her site says is required.  

The very first time I tried to see a provider that had one of those forms I filled it out. (I was a newbie to independents. I had seen agency ladies only up to that point.)  I never heard a thing back. I did not ask here what to do but I did some reading and saw the opposing arguments. I sent her an e-mail with all the requested information and got a prompt response. I've seen her several times since then. I am now in the school that says I won't fill out that form. If she is adamant about it I probably won't get to see her. I've learned a lot since then.

There are many stories on here that sound like yours. The guy fills out the form and gets no response. He asks for advice and hears the conflicting schools of thought. Sends the lady an e-mail providing all the required info and gets a session with the lady.  There are providers as I mentioned above that will not accept anything but the form. They make a good case for their way of doing things. Seems to me if she gets the info she wants how she gets it shouldn't matter.

I'd say you should give it a day (if you haven't already) minimum and then e-mail with all the requested information and see what happens. If still no response I'd move on.  

palomam gave you good info. I just wanted to fill in a little more. Don't forget it's still the holiday season. The lady could be busy with life. I know you have read that here several times in the last few weeks. Don't give up but be prepared say next and let her go.

Thanks, xyz23. I'll give it a few days.

What I don't know, and I don't know if anyone can tell me the answer, is what sort of information is shared by a referring provider. Is it just "he is who he says he is, he's honest, he's clean" or is there information that's open to interpretation, such as "I didn't enjoy our last time together" or "he's kinda funny lookin' (oh, just in a general sort of way)"?

I've had a couple of providers reply, and I've had at least one and possibly two who never replied back at all in the last few weeks. It drives me nuts not knowing what's behind the lack of response from the one or two

Don't let your imagination run wild, it's probably more benign than you think. I would follow up after a couple days with a "just checking to see if you got my meeting request..." email. Those online forms can get glitchy and sometimes the ladies get swamped and requests get overlooked. Or if they're busy and their schedule's full, replying to someone they don't have time for is not a priority. My main point is don't take it personally, some ladies just manage their business better than others. There's one lady I see regularly who I have an awesome time with when we can meet, but she's is so disorganized in her personal life, that I've almost given up on her several times.  

Regarding references, I've been told in confidence that they really do keep it business-like, essentially just "he's clean, respectful, on time, pays his fare." If she really likes you, then she may add in a few superlatives, such as "he's so great, I'll see him anytime." The nitty-gritty only comes out if there are red flags or you are exceptionally weird (in a creepy way). Or, if they are good friends, then they'll chat about you.

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Hey, I know that lady!

The one I know is so disorganized that she doesn't reply to my requests for confirmation of our meetings. I have to send her a text saying that I have until noon to cancel my hotel without cost so, because I haven't heard from her, I'm assuming that our meeting is cancelled. Then I'll get a quick reply saying that we're still on. Nothing like the threat of a cancellation to get her organized.

If I take the time to read your reviews, look at your website and fill out your request form the LEAST you can do is respond.

A simple "Thanks for your interest, but no thank you" or "Sorry, but I am not seeing new clients at this time" is better than ignoring me. Now you are wasting MY time, if I choose to follow up to make sure you got the message. Of course you may then just continue to ignore me.

Not a HUGE issue, but I agree with the OP

If no commitment has been made, then she's not wasting your time. It may be a bad business practice, but she doesn't owe a reply to your solicitation. "You win some, you lose some" is the best attitude to have to avoid an early heart attack.

"She told me I should call it in soooooo...I called it in........end of story."

Some ladies say nothing more than "he's safe" or "he's fine." Others give more detail. More detail usually comes with clients who are particularly awesome or, alternatively, not someone she would see again.  

It's HER solicitation! Her website states that if you are interested in getting together, fill out a form. A reply is certainly expected. I absolutely feel that is a commitment. Does she state "fill out the form, I might reply if I feel like it?" She is the one asking for business, she should behave in a professional manner. Not so funny to me how times have changed.........."no commitment has been made" sad excuse for poor lazy, behavior. Now if she says "men who I agree to see will be replied to, all others will be ignored" then she's being honest and no "commitment" is being made.  

I may try to contact her again to make sure she got the information, so with my time being valuable TO ME, I think I deserve an answer before I make a date with another provider. It's called common courtesy, I guess it's not that common anymore.

No heart attacks involved, not even that big of a deal, just responding to another person who would like to be treated with a little respect. How hard is it to say "thanks for the interest, but no thank you?"  
 

I don't understand why the provider wouldn't contact to at least get a little more information. The form didn't ask for anything that I could see as somehow disqualifying me. Nothing about age, race, size, etc.  

I just see it as a customer service issue. Even if I can't help a potential customer, I return his calls or emails.

Agree completely with you customer service issue. Also if woman wants to decline for ANY reason, it's just nice to not be left hanging.

What constitutes an acceptable time frame to hear back from a provider about references and verification information

You're absolutely right Joe, couldn't agree with you more. Even a negative response would be better than no response at all.  

I'm an upscale hobbyist, never talk explicitly, am a 60-something gentlemen, and have 8+ P411 and Datecheck references, and I have had the same thing happen many times, UNTIL I started making a "redundant" contact, preferably by phone. Several providers have told me that the site form submittance deal is very sketchy at best, and a lot of requests never come through. Maybe they are blowing smoke, but I no longer use the website contact forms unless there is no other choice, and have had very little problems since.

Mine is 72 hours. Then I move on; if I am contacted after that timeframe, I may or may not move forward, depending on my schedule.