Hello, newb here. I understand that when I contact a provider, I’ll need to provide screening info, including my full name. Understandable, makes perfect sense. My concern though is, if someone does the slightest bit of googling, they could see that I’m married (no, I’m not proud that I’m here, yes I’m here anyway. I have my own self-justification, and I’m sure I’m not alone in that).  Is this something I should disclose to a provider upfront, and give them the chance to say yes or no to meeting? Or is it more “don’t ask don’t tell”? Should I be worried about them using the screening info to contact my spouse, job, etc, or is this generally not a concern with a well-reviewed provider? (Obviously nothing is guaranteed, but generally speaking.

So I'll start with what will undoubtedly be unpopular advice:  If you're willing to cheat on your wife, but are worried about her finding out, you should probably just get a divorce.  If you carry on, and eventually get caught, you will lose your ass in the divorce.  Conversely, you can get that same divorce before malice is involved and likely walk away in a much better position.

Now to the actual question.  Most providers couldn't give a crap if you're married.  A lot of their clientele is likely married.  Stick with known-good providers, and you shouldn't encounter any issues in that regard.

That way they don't have to worry about the occasional client who gets all googly-eyed over them and wants to marry them.

 
And yes, if you stick to the well reviewed providers, the odds of them not contacting your wife, among other horrendous things, are fairly low.

and we honestly couldn’t care less. telling your spouse you’re seeking our services would be counterproductive and detrimental for us. the name of the game here is discretion - if we tell your spouse then we lose not only you as a client, but also trust in the community (and future clients) because one of the first things you’re going to do is warn everyone that someone’s outing you.

the only reason i can think of a provider having an issue with you being married is asking for an outcall to your private residence if you still reside with your spouse. we all risk being messaged by your spouse if they were to find out, but being caught red-handed is a whole other issue.

We do not care that you are married. It's none of our business.