I’m interested in a very specific scene which I don’t think most providers can accommodate. The problem I’m running into is most providers do not allow explicit language or mention of specific acts in initial conversations How can I communicate what I want to ensure nobody’s time is wasted without using explicit language

But here is something that might help a bit.

 
Research those providers who offer heavy BDSM using the filters on the Search Reviews page.

 
Then read up on the reviews of those reviewers to see if any of them did things that approximate what you have in mind.   You can even PM the reviewers and see if they'll give you more insight into the provider.

 
Essentially, you will have to end up BCD to explicitly relate what you want, but those are the rules.

 
Happy hunting

1) Posting an ISO post on TER. Seems that people are more open to explicit statements here than in say a text or email. You may get some responses and from their check the escorts reviews to see which might be the best match for you.

 
2) Saying what you are looking for in a discussion board and ask to see if others have needed to make such requests and how they communicated the specific acts. Some people do have a gift for words.

 
3) Search for reviews for potential escorts then reach out via TER PM. Again, often escorts seem more open the explicit statements in PMs than via their website form, email or texts or over social media.  

 
Good luck with your search.

If it's within your time frame, budget, and willingness, you can have a "regular" meeting (with no prior discussion) with someone who meets other criteria (hair color, height, ... Juicy Details ...). Once together, you will get to know each other and you can assess the chemistry. THEN, you can comfortably ask about your special interests for a future meeting.  
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You might have a good time that can lead to an even better time.

I’m a Queen at conversations with my expertise in this particular adult fun lifestyle. Vocabulary is everything. When I read some providers ads & websites they are soliciting prostitution. If you inquire using the wrong terminology you can be putting yourself at risk.

Maybe we can be friends…