This whole concept prevalent among providers of "I'm giving you every minute you're paying for, buster" is probably the biggest financial mistake a lady in this business can make. Marketing yourself like a vending machine is a great way for ladies to piss off potentially very, very lucrative regular clients. I'll give one example why. Consider the following a blue-print for success with us guys. It's a formula that's so simple, yet eludes practically all the ladies in the profession.
I'd like to tell the true tale of my experience with one provider, as a text-book example of what happens when you give the right clients MORE than what they're paying for. It's a rags-to-riches story.
About three years ago, I booked time with a young L.A. girl we'll call Anna. Transplanted from Russia to W. Hollywood via Brighton Beach. Booked her for a two hour session. I extended it to two when I couldn't pop in the first hour. She stayed three, chit-chatting during the last hour. The extra time and having a good listening ear were really the only things exceptional about her (that and she is quite bright). Skills, BBBJCIM, looks and everything about her were parity with other $300 girls. She was just starting out in the business. An immigrant, well-educated but no marketable skills. Husband split. Kid to support. Her clothes were on the cheap side. She drove a beat-up Toyota. She lived in one of those crummy LA apartments, I later found.
Guess who became my ATF for multi-hour gigs every single time I'm in L.A. for the rest of my life - solely because her approach to time was so refreshing in that first session? On top of the extra session time, we chit-chated on the phone for a half-hour every week/couple of weeks. She was very gracious about this, from the start. I tell her my problems sometimes. She has a genuine and sympathetic ear. She ENCOURAGES me to call. Imagine THAT!!! I asked her why she is so much more generous than most providers and she said this:
To make a long story short, she said that I'm a cut above most men (well, THANK YOU, lady - even if it isn't true!) and that while she IS taking a risk investing extra time, she doesn't mind, because she's betting that I'm the kind of guy who will be more like a friend to her, and will always be fair to her.
And I was. She gave, and I gave back. Anna never presented herself as a provider or even an escort. Certainly not anyone concerned about time. This is what marketers call having a "unique selling proposition." From the end of the first session, she wants to be your friend and lover. She never hit me for money; never gave me a sob story for a hand-out. Of course, Anna got popular in L.A. Her clothes gradually got better. Hair and make-up improved dramatically. I didn't realize how well she was doing until one time a year ago when I waited for her outside my hotel.
She wasn't driving a Toyota Corolla. She pulled up in a Mercedes -- a 500 SL, as a matter of fact. New. Her dress wasn't Macy's. It was Versace. Her watch was a Piaget. Diamond-studded. She was excited to tell me she had she just made the down-payment on a condo. In Bel-Aire, which is significant. "Good Gawd, Anna", I said, "are these gifts? Did you become the mistress of some heavy-hitter?" No, she said. She would be stupid to give a commitment like that to one man alone again; she did that already. Later that night, she let me in on her secret. After a couple of years with her, I knew Anna well enough to find her story credible:
Being generous with her time made her a rarity among providers, and much in demand. She was generous to EVERYONE, the first few months she saw someone. She treated everyone as a friend, not a customer. Yes, she worked hard and put in a lot of hours. Sure, some guys took advantage of her, big-time. BUT, gradually she winnowed out the not-nice-guys, the cheapstakes, and the ones who couldn't afford multi-hour sessions regularly and/or often. She simply made herself unavailable to them. Eventually these guys got the message, and gave up calling.
At the same time, she nurtured good clients -- always with the approach that a good regular customer who booked two hours got three; book three, get four. And more. Meet for lunch/dinner off the clock once a month or so? Sure! Theater on a Saturday night? Absolutely! That's her approach. And by the way, she never raised her rate.
As a result of her approach, today she has only SIX (or so) steady day/late afternoon clients who book 2-3 hours at a time with her every week, or pretty close. Plus, she has a few out-of-town guys like me who can be counted on for doing an evening once a month or so. She stopped advertising a while ago. You won't find Anna on TER or anywhere else anymore. She had her reviews taken down. Anna doesn't worry about new clients, because she doesn't need them.
She told me: You need to invest with men in the beginning because you don't know who the really good ones will be. Sure, she wasted a lot of time sorting the wheat from the chafe. But by giving more of her time - not just 15 minutes tacked to a session -- she found the type of men she wanted, and got even more in return. As she told me: She strives to be "the other woman" every man wants to have in his life - a confidente, a fantasy, a comfort, a friend, and reliable. Those are her words. Does all this have a certain level of price tag attached? Sure it does. But its not anything she ever discussed, or will even admit to if asked. She'll tell me I'm special, and she wants to be my friend, and fantasy lover.
Anna doesn't even refer to me and her other clients as "clients". She calls them her friends, and they are a friend to her. I can vouch for that personally -- she's always treated me as a loyal friend. Never, ever like a 'client' or 'customer'. Those words never pass her lips, because if she even thinks in those terms, she never lets on.
The moral of the story for ladies is this (if any are still reading): By hassling us guys (and ESPECIALLY regulars) for an extra $50 because our session went 15 minutes over, you may have just pissed off the guy who otherwise would have been a $5,000... $15,000 or (in Anna's case) $25,000 a year client. By presenting yourself as an hourly worker, you help yourself to be nothing OTHER THAN an hourly worker. But, maybe that's what most ladies want.
I submit Anna's story as an example of what can happen by not being a clock-watcher: Having just a few great clients, who are also good men. And not just clients - men who really do care about you, and know the limits of the relationship. You have to put in more time. But, you get more in return.
Anna's looks and skills aren't any better than any $300 lady who may still be reading this far. But her attitude to the business sets her apart. Her kid goes to private school now. She's gone from Brighton Beach to Bel-Aire, from Macy's to Movado. She did it by doing the exact OPPOSITE of what 95 percent of the women in this business do. As Paul Harvey is fond of saying on the radio: And now... you know the REST of the story.
