As hard as this is for me to admit I'm still a virgin at 24 years old. While I realize this isn't the most common situation for the majority of people on this site I would greatly appreciate any help from anyone who has been in this position or just anyone here in general. Up until recently I guess I tried not to think about my situation too much (denial), I was distracted with school, friends and hobbies but now being done with school and recently unemployed (I used to tutor at my college) I have too much time to reflect on the depressing state my life is in. Now I am hardly around any girls anymore besides my few friends significant others whom I assume all see me as to undesirable to introduce me to any of their friends. My inexperience has really started to become a huge burden I carry around with me everywhere. I'm even starting to feel like a lesser human and completely unable to relate to most people my age. I accept that I basically missed out on my sexual prime but I don't want to go without knowing what I have been missing any longer, it is becoming too much of a distraction and hindrance and is destroying what little is left of my self-esteem. So I have pretty much 100% decided to I need to do this, I can't keep waiting for something or some lucky break that I have never had any success with in the past. I have actually been saving up for this for a while because I promised myself that if I didn't have any success in the last 6 months I would commit to doing this in the new year. After reading some threads from people in my similar situation it seems to be common advice to book about 2 hours with a more mature provider who would be caring, more open-minded and wouldn't mind leading the session or wouldn't get frustrated while I fumble through everything.

I'm obviously a complete newbie to the hobby but have recently spent a good amount of time on the newbie board/faqs doing my homework and trying to educate myself on the ins and outs of everything (membership to this site, screening sites, etiquette, donations, etc...) Basically my few hurdles right now are is there any way to get accepted to a screening site such as preferred411 or datecheck if I am currently unemployed and out of school? I don't really have much of a work history outside a few retail jobs and my tutoring over the last few years. I understand there is a steep barrier to entry for newbies and screening is a must for the safety of everyone involved but if I can't get verified should I just try to go to Amsterdam or Germany or even Canada and go to a brothel there? I realize it will be very impersonal and probably not the best experience but it can't be much worse than what I am feeling now.

Thanks in advance if anyone helps me out there. I appreciate it more than I can convey.

Since you have no references, one of the screening services is a must.  I suggest P411 because they have an 800 # you can call and you can speak to someone there regarding what personal information you can provide to become a member.  There are plenty of options, and you will not need to provide a work #.  P411 is based in Canada, so you can be sure your information is safe.
You can then find P411 providers who list themselves a "newbie friendly" and require no OKs.  Write to them through the site requesting a date and explain your situation.  I agree a more mature (over 30) provider would be best.  Lots of them would love to help you pop your cherry.
As for going overseas, Amersterdam is a definite option, but Prague is also supposed to be good.  However, you may not need to travel that far as there are also places in the Dominican Republic and Costa Rica.  While I have not gone to either place, you can do a search on this site for discussion threads on both places.  That said, you will have a much harder time finding a compatible provider overseas.
Bottom line: I'd go the P411 route.

Lets just say I wasn't very experienced.
This lack of experience definitely messed with my confidence.
The guys above a right. Except for the shrink thing.
There is nothing wrong with being shy. Not a reason to seek therapy.
You will find that feeling melt away after you have had your first date.
Take it from a super shy dude.
After a few rolls in the hay, I broke my shell.
In fact providers are surprised when I tell them.
Because now I am truly comfortable around women.
I also learned to appreciate them.
A consept I didn't understand in the past.
Consider an older provider. I'd say 35 to 40.
They are usually more experienced, and will make things easy.
Just be careful you don't fall in love, or become addicted.
Typical newbie pitfalls.
Good luck in your new hobby!

Many providers (avoid those with a booker----pick someone you can email directly first and then talk on the phone) are really very sweet. Explain your situation by email, offering to meet in public and book two hours. Ask them to call you back. Do this with your top 3 choices and, I'll bet all is well.

Congrats on choosing to take matter into your own hands. Empires have been built on the same set of principles. Although a lot of providers say they require screening or references a lot in my experience do not. It basically comes down to this. Do you want the girl to know your a virgin before you have sex or not. My advice would be to just send a pretty lady of your liking a nice email asking to set up a date and see if she just says yes. You don't need to go into details. Of course you will be nervous but don't worry about it. The first time is already built up to much and you can always explain that you were a virgin after if you feel like it. Sometimes the less you say or think about things the better it is.

And I think that's gonna be your undoing.  Instead of just saying that you're inexperienced, you are making this out to be a huge, huge undertaking, both emotionally and mentally, in addition to sexually.  The fear I have is that you end up making this out to be a lot more than a paid encounter, and you end up having feelings for the provider.  Which could be a massive can of worms.

If this is about your worth as a human being because you basically see yourself as undesirable, I can only fear that if you fall for the provider and then later find out that she's only into you because you pay her, the outcome could be far worse than the time you spend in bed for the carnal and physical pleasure.

I think you really need to think about what you are realistically expecting.  What you are not looking for is a provider but someone who will basically make you feel like you are worth something more than what you think you are.  And that's very, very dangerous...and not really fair to a provider who is being paid to have sex with you for a certain period of time.

Many providers are happy to be with a virgin or an experienced guy, so long as it is understood that it is sex.  I fear that you are going to assign a value to it far beyond that, and very few providers will want to be involved in something like that.

Think about what you want out of this.  The logistics are simple enough.  And I can refer some providers who would see you.  But if you are going to get attached to the provider...that I don't really think is fair to the provider.  More importantly, it won't be fair to YOU.

While I do follow a standard screening process which includes my assessment of references, I may be willing to meet with You.... please check out my ad and if you're interested, shoot me an email.  I'd love to chat with you about your situation and possibly schedule a date  I am staying at a beautiful & discreet suite in Midtown East.  

xoxo
Lela

Please check out my profile, photos, etc., and shoot me an email....

xoxo
Lela

I appreciate your concern but honestly I really don't have any delusions about what i'm doing. Yes, behind all the jargon and discretion of companionship, donations, etc...I am paying a woman for sex for a set amount of time, I understand that fully. I don't realistically expect this to have any positive effect on my overall confidence or interaction with women in everyday life, but if it even relieves one bit of the pressure and tension and mystery surrounding sex that I have carried around with me for so long it will be worth it completely. I don't know how old you are but try to remember the feeling you had while you were a virgin as a young teenager, now imagine having that same feeling of frustration, eagerness and curiosity in your mid 20's...It has a become too much of a distraction and burden. Even if it is an arbitrary word and means nothing, I can't simply tell myself that and undo every bit of importance society places on it. All I basically want is someone who will be patient and understanding and guide me a little while I flub my way through most of the session. Someone who has seen it all and who takes making their client feel comfortable seriously. I may be putting a lot of pressure on the whole ordeal but I know I won't find this with a random girl. At this point with my situation I believe a provider will actually be preferable to a random hookup for a first time. I'd like to think a provider wouldn't look at me like a total leper and embarrass me for my lack of experience which would be a very real possibility with a civilian girl. I would appreciate your references if they fit the little criteria I have listed but if you are still hesitant I understand your reasons.

He said things along the lines of, "This is driving me crazy" and "I can't take this anymore," as well as, "This is the only way to deal with this issue."  It wasn't a guy who just said...I wanna have my first sexual experience and I'd like to find someone who is patient and friendly with virgins.

So if you interpret that as being mean...well, that wasn't my intent.  But I think any reasonable person reading this who has any semblance of concern for another person wouldn't want to create a situation where there are mismanaged expectations.  Especially when the guy just spent a lot of words explaining WHY this was so important.

My opinion is that it's better to ask questions upfront than to create a situation which is ugly down the line.

As far as the offensive statement you referenced at the end...I'm just saying that there are plenty of us who don't need to pay for sex to get laid here.  We pay for sex for the convenience factor, or because we want to play in a league that is higher than we usually play in.  But there is a league that many of us partake in during our civvie lives that allows us to have sex with certain types of women.  Cougars with average faces and banging bodies have never been an issue for me.  I personally DO NOT need to pay for that, and I would never pay for that here.

I sure as hell am not going to be posting recommendations for all to see on this board.  There are lots of freeloaders and information hoarders on this board.  If you have a specific request, then PM me, and, assuming that you check out as a guy who contributes to TER, you will probably get a response.  If not, don't expect an answer.

Not to be mean, but remember that I spent my own hard-earned resources to be able to obtain this information.  So I'm not interested in giving it away to those who have not demonstrated a propensity or a history of doing the same.  That's a general statement to everyone reading this, not to you.  As I said to you, the OP, feel free to PM me now that you understand my concern and conditions.

And for me, newbies are a breath of fresh air because they are genuine, excited, non jaded, never arrogant, and just wonderful all around.

For starters, don't bother going to Europe, Canada, or Dominican Republic to lose your virginity, that would be a complete waste of time and money

There are so many wonderful providers right here in NYC that can take real good care of you and help you overcome your issues, fears, etc with women


My advice is to first buy a VIP membership if you haven't already

Next is to jot down what is important to you and do your homework with the TER search function:

1)  What are your available funds.   See if you can swing a 2-hour date.  For a first-timer, a 1-hour date probably isn't enough time to acquaint yourself with a lady, get comfortable with each other, then enjoy each other.  Go for the 2-hours

2)  What would your ideal girl look like.   Height, body type, skin tone, short hair, shoulder length hair, mid-back hair, or ass-length hair.  Next, blue eyes, green eyes, brown eyes.   Blonde, brown, redhead.  Someone who resembles a co-worker, neighbor, or friends GF or wife you have the hots for.   Those are some of the HOTTEST sessions you can ever have...

3)  Age is important too.   QUITE important.   At 24, I would suggest a lady who is perhaps in her early 30's.   Gals in their 20's I find are not quite as experienced or condfident as gals in their 30's, and ladies in their 40's may just be a few years too old for you

4)  What are your sexual goals for this session.  Do you fantasize about eating pussy, licking a girls asshole, getting an amazing BJ and unloading days worth of jizz in her mouth?  

Doing your homework on TER will give you just about everything you need to make this first time a real special occasion


Don't do any drugs before the session, and if you drink, keep it to ONE drink so you don't have erectile issues, orgasm issues, or have to pee during the session

Hope this helps, and happy hunting !!