The crash of two satellites recently generated tens of thousands of pieces of debris that could circle Earth and threaten satellites and space missions for the next 10,000 years.

You probably know that I've already used my suction expertise to perfect the technology of the vacuum cleaner and the pneumatic tube. Indeed, some of you have participated in demonstrations of my innovative and unique suction techniques. Now I am working with NASA on the challenge of developing a spacecraft with a vacuum powerful enough to remove space debris.

Please help in my research and development. If you rise to the occasion, you will experience my prolonged suction techniques powerful enough to suck a satellite right out of orbit.

Of course, if you are a technophobe, you might simply enjoy the ultimate erotic experience of sharing the body and soul of a very creative and playful artist and photographer.

I am available to meet you in Stamford, Danbury, and throughout Western Connecticut. With enough requests, I will visit Hartford and New Haven.

... for a launch site and bring this astrophysicist to town to test her lift-off theories.

That was the cutest Ad ever! It half way makes me wish I had a weiner to give you a try....almost...well...nevermind. You're adorable!

I think all people who are familiar with the development of technology understand that while some experiments succeed, others fail. Those of us who engage in the r&d process prefer that our failures not be publicized. What is truly important are our successes in advancing the frontiers of science.

DT_lover-
I am deeply distressed that you have chosen to post videos of my failed experiments on this website. You should know better. After all, history will remember my innovations in suction technology, long after my failures are forgotten. Once you have experienced a demonstration of my work, I'm sure you will agree.

Rae-
Thank you for your very kind words, but you should understand that my advanced suction technologies are highly versatile and can be applied to more than weiners. Many women have participated in my research and development and received demonstrations of my work.