Followed Kyla's instructions exactly.
Filled out her on-line form.
Went through the screening process.
Received her email reply and confirmed back the time that she picked.
Called her an hour before the appointment -- requesting a location.
... and never heard back.
Called her again upon reaching downtown ... and never heard back.
Bummer. My fault, no acceptable plan B.
A plan B is always good to have, but in my experience the plan B is seldom the same level of experience you were hoping for with Plan A. Not your fault that she was NCNS. Hope she makes it up to you if you are inclined to try again.
Why is it your fault?
Good point. I guess after years of practicing this hobby -- it's my fault for being disappointed when I get stood up.
Where did you drive to? If in your contact one hour prior you were to get a location and it was not obtained, why did you leave home to drive to nowhere?
Suggestion, would be to get a lay out of appointment.
1> contact with intent.
2> referrences/screening
3> set appointment date and time(make sure the time is CONFIRMED)
Then what?
4> ask, when and how will location be given
5> make that contact BEFORE leaving home
6> make contact at destination
7> go have fun
To me, having a date and time means little or nothing at all. I never feel comfortable without a back up plan until I have been given a location and have gotten confirmation within 60-90 minutes of the meeting. Once I leave home, I am upset if I do not meet the person that got me into my car to leave home/work.
I am anal, I am this way with any kind of meeting, family/friends, the hobby, golf date.
It sucks that you didnt connect, but it seems to me that your plans were very sketchy with only a date and time to go on. Plan back up always until you get the location AND confirmation as close to the meeting time as possible. Days/weeks in advance is no definate thing!
What is her ter #?
I don't see anyone from MN whose has reviews under that name so can you point out specifically which girl you had the problem with.
1/3-1/5 to MN kylalavi
and made the top poster list
I had the same experience with her today. Already had location info, but no answer to my call upon arrival. My guess is something unexpected came up.
as to when either of you last made contact with her. I think I know of whom you speak, but it sounds as if there is a problem and she has not been in contact with anyone for at least 2 days. Leaving home without a same day connection with 60-90 minutes sounds risky to me!
That said, I give NO second chances with NCNS, that is why I am so picky with contact 60-90 minutes prior and certainly before I leave home.
Bummer you both went through it, I hope others are watching and making contact before leaving for an appointment with her!
everythang you said.
There really is no legitimate excuse... A NCNS is just that.. It takes 20 seconds to notify someone that you are going to cancel on them...
I would expect an apology from her... but guys don't listen to the White Knights lol
Yes. It is a bummer to not connect. However, I do not understand why this seems to be a big issue for so many guys. Sometimes plans do not work out. When I plan something, I have the time to burn. Because of the services provided when I do connect, I am willing to lose time the occasional time I do not connect. Only if I was burning several hours commuting, would I begin to be upset.
There are only rare exceptions who may NCNS more than they connect so chances are good that you will connect.
I once had to cancel last minute because a neighbor had been robbed and there were police outside my door. Give it a chance.
you have to cancel.
The issue is why would I or any other guy accept a NCNS? Ladies should not either!
I think it's been pretty bad and the gals sure don't get to complain about that
Well at least u didnt lose any money during the process. Are we talking about kaylalavi ? If so i thought she was going to vegas ? There was an earlier post about who's goin to vegas this week and she said she was going to attend. Still no excuse not to contact ur clients tho.
I myself have a few NCNS but always offer an explanation along with an discount rate for the situation when I am to blame. Remember some of us do have kids, attend school and even hold a day job just as you.
But think about this;
What about the individuals that confirm dates through emails and direct connect via phone calls and even have the best reference confirming their legit but yet NCNS when we have a room booked and are ready to meet. We rarely see or hear of us ladies posting NCNS this matter should be between yourself and who your date is with. Why take it as far as posting and not even holding a conversation with that provider first (been there and done that) I know I have a few of these a month when hosting and I just move forward with the next especially when I get no respond from the individuals offering an discount and explanation. Should we also cross you out and post with a NCNS?
Just my thought.
Which makes me raise a question on the "backup plan."
While none of us wish to get stood up, with a little due diligence that risk is fairly small. Maybe it's just me, but it sure seems like a miserable way to treat the second lady. You're likely to hook up with lady #1, and then call and cancel the "backup", who now has a hole in her schedule on short notice, which she's not likely to fill. For me, this is a hobby. For her, it's likely paying the bills.
Just my two cents...
For me it's just having a list of ladies I can try on short notice if the initial falls through regardless of why.
Fair point, but that's tougher for us travelling guys to develop that bench strength. I've only been cancelled on once, by a local gal in MSP who came down with the flu. She was total class about it, contacting me early in the day, and offered a discount for another date. Not being local, I ended up watching Sportscenter over and over.
Good points LC. I'm sure there are just as many bad hobbists as there are providers.
IMHO, NCNS from a guy is no more acceptable than it is from a girl.
NCNS sucks,but as others have said some can roll with it better than others.And I agree that guys are probably just as guilty,if not more so,than ladys.What I find bad about this particular situation is that Kyla has made a point of making a big splash here on the MN board.It would be nice to hear her side of the story.If she did NCNS she needs to come clean with a reason.
This board is for information. If guys NCNS, go ahead and let people know.
I for one get details set ahead of time and then I go. I often am unable to confirm an hour before leaving due to where I am or what I am doing.
I also prefer to communicate by email, using only the phone when I'm on the way.
As for a backup plan, I don't want a list of phone #'s floating around in my car, my pants or my office. Too much potential for discovery.
So ...
Kyla TER ID: 115177, did get back to me via email and did have an unfortunate story to tell -- saddly, I believe her. There are bad guys out there who will take advantage of girls in vunerable situations.
Yes, she could have returned my calls -- it would have only taken 20 seconds, but she had a lot to think about -- so I'm willing to give her a pass. Hell I would not have set the appointment if she didn't have outstanding reviews (thanks TER!).
Good discussion points though -- and I agree guys who NSNC are just as bad.