Minnesota

What the hell did I do?angry_smile
r3ALLy5553 20 Reviews 1626 reads
posted

So after a couple discussions from my last email thread I took the advice and got a p411 account and did the verification. I tried a handful of individuals and found that again I still need references but found someone to be receptive and take me in as a newbie (although I am not). Unfortunately they had a personal conflict last minute which was totally understandable. So I did what anyone else would do and that was to search for another provider. I got a few to respond and they would like to meet but they all (another 3) all either declined or stopped returning my calls.

What the hell, I have no idea what I am doing wrong it feels like I have been black listed. I have reviews, been a longtime member (although not VIP as of late) and finally got p411. What am I doing wrong?

Maybe you should just go back to the one who had the conflict and reschedule your appointment.  Sometimes getting into the swing of things (or back into the swing of things in your case) is not easy but once you break through then matters improve.

I took a break from the hobby for a while and when I returned, found it very difficult to get a date with anyone. I actually had better luck scheduling with a couple of ladies in another town went I went on a trip.
You need to relax. Find a gal who is newby friendly, and willing to give you references. Once you get established you should be OK. As was suggested, see if the provider you were going to see is willing to reschedule.
You really can't blame the women for being careful.
Good luck.

eviews mean very little... as LE can write them and if they are not recent then there might even be more reticence.

With P411 things are much more secure and still the ladies, including myself, need to see what is called 2+, where we see you're still in the game and apparently not LE!  :)

Whitelists on TER are great but it is not the top trend for ladies to give whitelists on TER for whatever reason, but on P411 it is the culture to give OK's.

This will help.   As far as blacklists... I hear they exist and haven't gone there, but what is happening for you is not likely the blacklist issue as much as a safety issue.

Once you get back into the swing with your 2+ you'll be swell!  

-- Modified on 8/21/2013 3:01:38 PM

I'm a great person to see if you need a reference. You can email or call me.  

Posted By: DecentlyDirty
So after a couple discussions from my last email thread I took the advice and got a p411 account and did the verification. I tried a handful of individuals and found that again I still need references but found someone to be receptive and take me in as a newbie (although I am not). Unfortunately they had a personal conflict last minute which was totally understandable. So I did what anyone else would do and that was to search for another provider. I got a few to respond and they would like to meet but they all (another 3) all either declined or stopped returning my calls.  
   
 What the hell, I have no idea what I am doing wrong it feels like I have been black listed. I have reviews, been a longtime member (although not VIP as of late) and finally got p411. What am I doing wrong?

This is probably one of the most difficult things to wrap your head around; and definitely an obstacle while hobbying.  

some advice that I can give to you is this...  Sometimes you have to see someone that you don't want to see and take one for your own team.   Do this with someone (provider) who is extremely responsive to emails / private messages and ideally uses a smart phone :)  I know of couple of girls here in MN that are SOO quick in responding to reference requests it's super human.  

While BP has it's purpose.  A lot of providers do not like references from strictly BP girls.  So if your reference's TER page has only advertisements on BP.  YMMV greatly while using this person as a reference.  Hopefully the provider you want to see recognizes one of the reviewers under that persons TER page.  

P411 does have it's advantages... Although, if you want to breeze through verification, you'll need to have a combination of different things until your +++ get up to a "Okay" number of OKs.  What are these different things?  Maybe a combination of Date Check + RS2K + References + TER White List.    

If you travel.  This also makes verification easier.  Caveat about traveling and references.  The provider you are attempting to see would rather receive a reference from a local provider that she either knows about or has direct dealings with.  Think Nationally Ranked Providers to solve this issue, or start over from the bottom again.  

References, while be fantastic and awesome, has two distinct disadvantages.  
1.  Time Sensitive and Delays..  Remember providers are not answering services / secretaries.  Make sure that it is okay to utilize them as a reference, and probably shoot them a thank you after you've been OKed.  (It's just a nice thing to do)

2.  If you're a man whore like myself; it's a quick way to have your wonderful reference start thinking Dag-Nabit, he's seeing all these people why the heck isn't he seeing me.    

 
I've noticed girls on p411 will look at two distinct things in your profile.   Number of OK's and the number of days your account has been active.  If P411 is your only method for verification, you're going to be at the whims of the provider you are attempting to see until your account is a little more seasoned.  

However, if you receive an OK from the top providers here in MN.  Let me tell you a secret (a lot of them know each other)  you'll be good to go with a lot of new providers / traveling providers / other people.  

Just like p411 is a singular tool for providers.  Us Hobby'ers need to recognize that sometimes having multiple verification methods is downright handy.  RS2K, Date-Check, TER Whitelist, P411 + References.  You won't have issues seeing anyone + the benefit of same day appointments when scheduling matches up

ut the same day thing.  I am scheduled out for 1 or 2 weeks often, so thinking P411 + will help with every provider to get a "same-day" is sometimes asking for a bit much.   Planning ahead can be a great thing and is great to anticipate.   I've heard I am not the only provider who is booked out a week ... and that is a good thing.

Some providers can do plenty of same days though.  This too can be common and so then the whitelists, P411 and Date-check can certainly give you a same day easy turnaround and that is also a good thing.

... can be a lot of fun.  Often excruciating, but fun!  

I tend to book at least a week or two in advance, to ensure I get a day/time that I know I'll be available.  And as Élan mentioned, many providers are booked out a week, or more.

Posted By: elanmontage
 
   
   
 But the same day thing.  I am scheduled out for 1 or 2 weeks often, so thinking P411 + will help with every provider to get a "same-day" is sometimes asking for a bit much.   Planning ahead can be a great thing and is great to anticipate.   I've heard I am not the only provider who is booked out a week ... and that is a good thing.  
   
 Some providers can do plenty of same days though.  This too can be common and so then the whitelists, P411 and Date-check can certainly give you a same day easy turnaround and that is also a good thing.
 
I did say... when schedules match up :-)

 
Elan is correct.. A lot of the ATF providers here in the cities do have tighter schedules and are scheduled out a ways.  Which to me poses a bigger issue than the entire references / verification aspect

After you send your references and stuff... If you sent it via email.  Don't hound / phone stalk / email stalk the provider.

Seriously.. Don't do it.  

Follow up politely if you haven't heard in a couple days, and you know your references would have responded by that time.  

Allow the providers to go at their own pace and Verify you.  Hounding someone just makes you sound needy and creepy.  

Don't do it

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