"she's not my usual type but I thought I'd try her out"

Usually is a sign of nothing good about to be written....and a bad performance score.  And since she's not is usual type, probably not her fault!!!   RRRRRRGGGGGGGGGG   Why you guys do that?

Re: What is your most annoying phrase to read in a review: mine is....

"VIP's read on" Really, ya think should?

I agree. Just stupid.

What, you thought she would change just for you? Because you're so sexy, maybe?

Generally followed by expressions of great indignation when the session is not stellar.

Or, "You could tell she wanted me in there".  lol!  Man have a got a lot of swamp land in Florida to sell to you guys...

She asked me to xyz and "who was I say to say no?"

"She gave me a great message."  Was the message verbal or written?  Fortune cookie or telegram perhaps?  

I'm a master of the typographical error, but when the reviewer raves about the "message" six times, it ain't a typo.

With each orgasmic wave, her uncontrolled farting crescendoed,

filling the still night air with her aural assault and feral fragrance.

Really?! TMI