1)PM sent/check your PM – my question is; if you sent them the message won’t they see right on top of their log-in screen “message” do we need to be told you sent them a message? Can we not see and read; did I say see – yes, even a blind man knows when the sun is shinning! Here is what happens; I open your board thread on interesting subject above and get to that fourth thread with enormous insight waiting for me, knowledge to be learned, immense anticipation, innovate opinion of another individual adding to the discussion only to be meet with: sent a PM? Next you get… I’m not a VIP I don’t get PM’s, please send it to my e-mail address; John P Smith – like that is your real name? Next you get what does it take to be a VIP, going into why is reviews taking so long, into a 411 on that CL lady and guess what by that fifteen thread, I forgot what was the original question was – asking myself how the heck did we get here?
2)Aliases–why - I like all creative different aliases and have written past “columns” just about those, as some of them really get me laughing before I read line one. It has been suggested by some that a person has small balls for using them but in the couple times in past when I used them my balls never seem to get much smaller? Then there is the guts thing, my inner guts never came out when I used them either? My question is one of; isn’t this already a make believe world, so how can you have an alias for an alias. The way I read the general posts; most people on both sides have about 10 -20 aliases per person? I love guessing who is writing what, in fact most of the time I guess wrong, thinking it is provider only to have someone point out they have three reviews – you get the picture I’m always wrong? The board is like the old Wild West Jesse James or Jack the Ripper or Pretty Boy Floyd and Box Car Bertha; love the names but even those people didn’t have alias outlaw name for their alias name? Based on Humanitarian, Political, Ideology, Religionist and Mass Hysteria on the board, they should be outlawed. My past use of them has lead to trouble for the Turtle and had to “out” myself once, lesson learned no more aliases but I have no way of proving that except to say I will use 2Terrapin2 for my next one, but it is probably already taken so before sending this out, I’m copy righting that name!! I’m starting a grass roots effort to stamp out alias or use more-not sure, but I feel most people want their balls back, to grow a sack, have guts, moral fiber, nerve, backbone, fortitude and be brave… guess what, never will happen, pussies!!
3)Trouble – yes there is trouble right here in River City, trouble in River City, kind of makes you want to break out in song!!! Here we go again with the TER Lawyers Are Us; I was Pre-Law but went into retail, have my paralegal degree, attended law school for a month and of course stayed at a Holiday Inn last night!! If you listen to me you are going to the Pokey, end up in a tent next to mine, get a monitor put on your unit, like me and come down with latest American Medical Disease – Sex Addiction; which requires the person to attend counseling with Tiger and Jesse James! First thing to do is get your throw away Jason Bourne - 007 phone, get in the checkout line with the drug pushers, pimps, bank robbers, terrorist and special agents who use these devices, get an alias for your alias, lay low, don’t go to Bloomington, watch for car tails, don’t see any CL ladies and relocate and don’t leave a forwarding address!! Common sense tells me don’t spend money for a lawyer, have a name ready (when they come for you, bad boy) don’t say a word, ask for your lawyer when they cuff you, wear Depends so when you shit in your pants, and ask your doctor for sleeping Meds to sleep at night.
4)If the only tail you saw this weekend – didn’t real see any tail (a few rabbits, my dogs, does that count – No sex with God critters I’m just not that kind of man) but I did eat some cow and lamb is that a close enough extremity for you to count – or course they were not dressed up in cute outfits?
5)Let's end the rumor mill and get back to having fun? Ok once again I’m the last to know – Where is Gossip Alley right next to Lonely Avenue, neither one came up in my GPS unit? What or who has Back Channels; my TV only goes up to channel 69 – I tried for an hour but couldn’t get it to go backwards? I’m just a guy trying to meet a girl who will complete me, she had me at hello! Who is working with this LE feller and is he, her Big Daddyo? Why doesn’t anyone EVER tell me anything, where do I go to get this information, plus a lot of bad words in that text? Who's name came up and why – this is the exact reason why those Dead people keep showing their faces – it confuses me (doesn’t take much), scares me, gives me bad dreams, provides a metamorphosis alteration, and I don’t even know why?
6)I’m coming to Minneapolis – Tattooed Asian – Yes folks it was me, she is flying in on my private aircraft, got tired of the NYC subway, we are getting new tattoo’s together, shopping at the Mall, Twins game, complete with taking the train. She will be staying at my summer home out on Minnetonka. Back to where it all began, the beginning with no middle and no end, the ride of your life. Please join us at a hosting party by MSP finest; previously announced on this board a while back. Only uncover brothers, no Johnny law, a three review minimum, party into the night, multiple ladies of your choice, security and drugs provided by G2. Drug and alcohol free zones! Bigger then big, smaller then big, and bigger then small – just a nice Sunday social event of the spring, by consenting adults, our make believe world will collide with reality in one evening. Book your time with TA and get 50% off party favors, see you then, see you there and see you often!!! (Tattooed Asian is in no way affiliated with 1Terrapin1, Substitute ladies are possible –all orders are final)
7)Need a way to verify something in advance – why does this person drink so many cups of coffee, is he addictive, require a Tiger time out, is he taking the supreme leader supplements or can he never be satisfy? How much can one lady take, I’m remember my time as Gigolo (even though Puck won’t recognizes my skills by giving lady killer VIP status) I had this lady “Make” me drink four cups of coffee – boy that was hard – but not as hard as I was, four times? I may have been on a little psychedelic drugs Vitamin A or the nature high Mescaline, I kept seeing two or three of her, while losing count on the cup situation? That had to be the best 20 minutes of her life, she probably barely survived the bunny honey that kept going and going, at peak performance, the best in the west, tops of the pops, fastest gun in Mountainview, the Boise Bronco.
8)Oh My... and then Oh My again - Stiff Mister – Easy little big man she is not real, get up off the floor, you got in the game late, missed the beginning, get the wood down, start thinking with the big stiff head. I realize this is all make believe – but too good, to be true, probably means just that. I do get it that in your mind you are there with that little hot tamale, she a man killer, hopelessly horny, giving you the time of your life! You have reached the promise land with 7 virgins and when you feel a slap across your face and you hear your better half say snap out of it dear, you are having a dream and by the way, she asks you, who is Kathy you were moaning and yelling out her name - Tent City for you!!!
