Thanks Mia,

I'll have to read this book sometime. I tend to love with undivided attention. Time spent with my loved ones is the most precious.  

When it comes to intimacy, I look for a combination of #2 and #5. I love when I can spend time with someone and forget about the rest of the world, just talking, touching, and enjoying each other. TBH, that's what I'm looking for in this "hobby." I haven't found the person I can really do that with, but I'm sure she's out there.

I spent a lot of my pre-teens in the very rural south, of times with my family on about 225 acres deep into Mississippi. So for a long time we had no cable, Internet, and definitely no cell service. Being so inaccessible meant folks had to come by and check on us. And, true to southern value, we were to entertain them while they were there. It also meant most of our time spent together was distraction free.  

So I think my intimacy style is strongly influenced by that. When I’m on dates, I’m usually completely zoned into the other person. Whatever he/she needs to feel satisfied is what I will give, based on verbal and nonverbal cues. That might be any of the other “love languages”.  
And I want to be loved the same way because... what I need changes from day to day! If I’m having a stressful time at my office, I value a partner who is able to sense that and can be positive/uplifting in what they say or lend a helping hand in helping me to think through some possible solutions. But sometimes I’m feeling extra snuggly and just want to be eaten.

As a military brat and former member of the service, I have a strong predilection for quality time. You find yourself savouring those moments, albeit brief, with friends, family, loved ones whether it be through mediums like video/film, a photograph, or good old fashioned memory. When you know you won't see someone for ages, you tend to remember the cologne they used to wear, the specific tobacco in their pipe, the way they'd brush your hair, make you laugh till you double over. The way that they would pick up the phone at 3am in the morning when you needed to talk or how they'd call at 3am in the morning and pull rank on the phone to get them to wake you because they "just wanted to talk".  

 
After that, it's most definitely Acts of Service or Physical Touch. Those two tend to numerically score equally for me. Acts of Service, in my mind, speak loudly without having to say much at all. If I mention that I need to get the oil in my car changed, and I notice all of a sudden it's been done, that is amazing. If I've had a bad day and dinner needs to be cooked but you arrive with take out... you are the GOAT (greatest of all time). Things will definitely being going down in the bedroom. Physical Touch - well that's a no brainer. As a dominant woman in my day to day life, there is something about having a person touch you in a way that makes you melt. The finesse of a simple touch making the armour fall off is exquisite. In addition, when I'm out with a suitor at a party & they slowly come up behind me, wrap their arm around  my waist, and kiss that spot, you know, the crook of your neck. Damn. It's like a power move for the whole room (she's mine), and a way to express affection.  

 
After that, it's typically Words of Affirmation and then Receiving Gifts. Regardless, I have seen and recognize how my preferences make themselves known in our world here. Often times I crave the longer encounter because it feels more natural to me & allows me to build a more genuine connection. With Acts of Service, I go out of my way to try to make each experience unique by asking questions that will allow me to get the little things right (hopefully). With Physical Touch, whether it's soft & sensual or hard & primal, well... I'll let you imagine that.  

 
LJ, xx

It's changed over time.

When I was young, I think 1and 3 were tops.  Then when I started having committed relationships and then kids, my main languages changed to 2 and 4.  And in recent years, I've realized how important 5 is to me, such that it's probably my primary love language now.

...Dr. Chapman's book...

...will be next on my reading list, I feel very good about my own practice of those 5 actions but I have not consciously kept track of when where & how I apply those practices, & that book sounds like a great challenge to positive self awareness.