I called her this afternoon, left a message and she called me back offering me her 4 pm appointment. I live across town from her so I left at 3 pm and got to her area at 3:45. Called her as she had requested. She texted me and I had to remind her that we had an appointment. Silence for 15 minutes. Sometime after 4 she texted me that "Maintenance" was at her place. She updated me once in the next 45 minutes. Maintenance was still there. I gave up at 5 pm. Drove home for an hour in the rain. I am disappointed and pissed. This has never happened to me before and I have been in the hobby for over 5 years. She has 41 very good TER reviews going back to 2010.

A few questions:
Does this happen often in the hobby?
When it does, how do you deal with it?
How can I warn others; would that do any good?

... it sounds like a very legitimate excuse.

No time for that so I move on. Unless I be seen her 3 or more times.

First...you got stood up and that sucks.  If what you said is true she should make it right.  I hate driving in the rain as I'm sure you do too.  

Second...if maintenance was at her place she could have stepped out and make a call or texted a better answer than leaving you hanging for that long.  Sounds to me she had no intention of seeing you but, again, that is if what you are telling us is legit.

Third...this happens to many people every day.  I've said it before and I'll say it again...your appt isn't confirmed until you see the whites of each others eyes.

Fourth...when it happens I either start throwing out other emails or texts to find someone else who wants to make some $.  Other times I go home, nurse my shattered ego with a beer and drunk text a half dozen ex-gf's who never respond.

Fifth...if the provider in question never got back to you then the ball is in your court.  You have to determine if your further posting including who she is would be worthwhile.  That my friend is a gray area you have to navigate yourself.

There are many providers with at least "41" reviews as well as those with reviews going back to 2010...but not that many lol.  

All I can say is that I hate driving in the rain, especially if there's no pot of gold at the end of that rainbow!

I probably have not seen 'that' provider yet but can't be sure as so many ladies "fit that vague profile". Might be interested in seeing her...on a sunny day!

I was refraining from posting this but since Oldtimer pointed it out I might as well go ahead and blast you.

This was a dickhead move on your part and you need to own up to it.  Giving just enough info that anyone with basic knowledge of TER can figure out who you attempted to see but not actually naming anyone so you can pat yourself on the back about what a swell guy you are.

You ever stop and think that some others might fit that same criteria and you may be harming them, and their business, just because of an unfortunate coincidence with a year and some numbers?  How about someone who started that same year and now gets her next review and Bingo!  conclusion jumpers everywhere go off half cocked.

Sorry your ego got bruised, sucks, we've all been there but think before you do something stupid like this.  At least man up and leave no ambiguity out there.  I named who it was on my NCNS thread.

Or don't start a post at all.

Well maybe I need to brush up on my search skills because I only found two that match the details provided. Couldn't be them either because he says she has "very good reviews" Not according to my standards.

1) Yes
2)  I allow a reasonable period of time (2-3 days) to hear back from the provider.  If I get a reasonable response in that time and everything works out then I will let it go and depending on how much I wanted to see her, try to schedule with her again.  I have had success with this strategy, including one provider I saw regularly for several years despite having an NCNS.  But I am also willing to name names if I don't get a response or it is unsatisfactory.  Do I try to reschedule on the fly?  Yes but I've also learned that the results of that can also be unsatisfying and that it is often best to simply put my money away and save it for another day.
3)  You can't write a review of am NCNS; the only thing you can do is post it here.  But as BBP pointed out, dropping as many clues as you did without being specific makes it easy for people to blame the wrong person.

Re Vorlon's #3, that's exactly why I did not name someone else's NCNS. That's their job if they so choose. All I could do is allude to a particular lady at a certain moment in time as reviews are always coming in. That provider could now have 42, 43, or even more reviews. I just would consider any of them...on a sunny day more than a rainy day lol.

Ok, so you called to arrange it and text her at 3:45 for your 4pm.  You say she texted you back...presumable before 4pm.  What did she say in that text?

Without that response it really is a piss on a provider post.

Now with the excuse she gave IF it was true...she had options.

1. Tell you maintenance was there, we all know repair men do not show up when we want them too, they show up when ever they get there and we don't send them away because it could be a long wait to get them back!  Meaning a reschedule was probably coming but who knows now.

2. she could have invited you up with the repair man there and went on with her appointment with interruptions...how would have that pissed you off?

3. she could have invited you up and treated you like a friend and when your hour was up taken the donation and had you leave since you are paying for time and nothing more.  That might have pissed you off right!

4. She forgot and drummed up an excuse.  Who knows why and who cares, if she does not want to see you, got a bad feeling or any other reason she cancelled do you really want her to see you and give you the cold shoulder for your time and take your money?

My suggestion, put your money in your pocket, choose which hand will do the trick until you can spend your money on someone who WANTS to see you and have a good time!

Me personally I would have been sympathetic and seen if she would have offered me a special for having to cancel.  That way you get to see the lady you wanted and for a discounted price.  Being instantly pissed and unforgiving burns that bridge and you have to move on!  

I had one lady tell me to come right over when I contacted her and she called me as I was walking up to her door and said she could not see me.  No reason or excuse at the time.  I turned around and said I hope you and the family are ok and we'll try again another day.  I was a little miffed but I kept the door open, waited nearly 2 months to try again and she gave me a 2 hour date for the 1 hour price and we had an awesome time!

You were paying for it. Guess it sucks when you can't even buy pussy. Yea, he should post the provider in question like you didn't.

You posted this pile of shit as a response to me.  Care to elaborate?  I can't see where anything you said is a response to my post.

She followed up after. She doesn't have to apologize extensively but if we had an appointment, "Maintenance is here." "Still here." doesn't cut it. I wouldn't be pissed but I'd also take it that she could care less whether she sees me or not (which is completely her right and would likely apply to most providers).

Still, I don't like to support those with a 'take it or leave it' mentality. It shows such a lack of awareness that she is providing a service. Our interactions all impact the end experience.

She's not 'wrong' but it would be a turn off. How difficult is it to just text, "Sorry we couldn't meet - was unexpected and took far longer than I'd hoped. Would love to try again"? If she can't give that much of a shit, neither will I