It sounds more like the blind leading the blind.

You don't have to be an attorney to
figure that out Mark.4444! Brilliant deduction
you must be exremely intelligent!!

So... today I had a very "off" experience. Of course I have to come here to discuss it, because I know I will get a lot of great feedback from both the ladies and our awesome fellers. I got a call earlier today from a gent looking to set soemthing up for around 2:30. He calls me a little before one  and tells me he's on his way and will be there in 45 min. So I do a mad dash over to my place....they tell me they have no non-smoking rooms avail. I call him (this was at most 15 min after) no asnwer, so I leave a message. He calls me back twenty later says he's there. I tell him I have a diff location, and I left a vm. I could tell he was pissy, but who can blame the guy. He tells me it's gonna take him awhile. I go to check in at the place, they make me wait 10-15 minutes before i can get in. He calls says he's here. I told him to go into the back, when I go to let him in I go to the wrong door, then pull back around front...I text and then call 3 times...nothing. Then he calls back 15 minutes later and wants to argue. About how I am jerkin him around,he can't wait to write a review. At which point I try to explain that it wasn't my intention to have him wait or have to switch locations. Instead of letting me explain he starts telling me what happened...off on a tangent. Arguing about minor discrepancies like door numbers and why did i drive around back instead of walking through the hotel ( does it really matter?!) I kid you not, for 15 minutes this guy " xxxxx " sits and draws conclusions and I try to tell him, look you're unsatisfied I totally understand."  And he just keeps saying "this is why we use TER, so you can't jerk us men around." " You only have 3 reviews." WTH it's Friday, who wants that negative energy. But I am upset because I don't want anything negative written about me Tht's not the kind of person I am; someone who stands people up and lies. I've never had someone be so argumentative and rude to me off of here... I have to ask why is it ok for them to threaten you with this "i'm gonna write about this."

-- Modified on 12/2/2011 2:27:07 PM

-- Modified on 12/2/2011 4:53:55 PM

-- Modified on 12/2/2011 3:20:03 PM

FYI - If no money was exchanged and you didn't actually see him, he can't write a review.

No... He did not see me, and nothing was exchanged. I had no clue that was the policy. He just kept saying that he couldn't wait to write about it.

Golynx has a very valid point. How can he write a review if he did not see you?

I don't know...I'm newer to this whole thing. I assume he is an avid user, and I wasn't completely aware of what the guidelines are.  I know you can't win em all...and I tried to make ammends and be civil even after a few rude remarks... and I don't want that kind of blemish on me. You know what they say about one bad apple!



-- Modified on 12/2/2011 3:20:53 PM

I don't think he can write a review either.  Shit happens as they say, and sometimes, for whatever reason, things just don't go as smoothly as they could.  Not your fault.  I wouldn't worry about it. Life's too short.  You have 3 solid reviews and expect you'll have more good ones soon.

.....but doesn't look like you were trying to jerk the guy around.

Hopefully he cools off and calls you back to get the air clear.

A breakdown of civility by either party is just bad form and shouldn't be tolerated.

Not really her fault if I could change anything I would of not even bothered if its so much drama for him.
He had no right to threaten you like that .
We can't please everyone but its fun to try right .

I do wish providers would make sure they have a room before saying "This is where I will be"

But I have found that some ladies can be very appreciative of a guy that can remain calm and polite when shit does happen.

Have a good weekend.

KW

I am aware that this situation is not funny today but one day you will sit back and laugh.  
Yes, we are all real people and s**t happens sometimes.  I have had a sudden case of the hives, car wreaks, hotel problems, phone dropped in the tub, lost phone, phone just not working right, unexpected road construction, got pulled over, period 3 days early (man I hate that)  and even a seizure right before an appointment.  Things happen, it is a part of life and just because we are providers does not make us superhuman's.  I feel if a fella can't understand that then he is probably not worth my time and am glad things didn't work out.  The same thing should apply on our side.  We should understand if somebody is running late or can't make it due to "life".

Another thing don't worry so much about people writing negative things.  You can't please everybody and the smart fella's are able to see through the BS.  If a guy tried to argue with me he never would have hit the 15 minute mark, I would have told him when he could speak to me with respect to call back and hung up on his angry butt.

Sorry you had to deal with this!  Sisterly cyber hug!

Bad things happen, sounds like it was beyond your control.
It was short notice, and problems checking in, etc.
Don't let it bother you and move on.  
If anything you now know to not take short notice appointments unless you have a place already.  
But it's also reminder to us clients to schedule appointments with enough time for the lady prepare.  

That's my $.02

This is not directly applicable here, because we haven't heard both sides, but:

In my experience, much more often than not, when the stories different, one person is telling the truth and the other is lying.

That's how I read it too - appointment for 2:30 and he calls at 1pm and is on his way; ETA in 45 minutes? Dude needs a math lesson, or maybe a digital watch so he doesn't have to figure out the difference between the big hand and the little one.

Hotel check in is at 3pm. Most of the time they allow early check in, but the earlier you try to get the room, the less your chances are of getting in, and Friday is the worst day of the week to attempt it. Not that this oblivious selfish prick would think on that, he just decided things were gonna be his way, didn't even ask to move it up, just tells her he's coming early.

SHE should have put the brakes on him right then and there, until she could confirm her room. That's her bad. But being semi-new and wanting to elevate her rep she tries to jump through the hoops to accomodate him, but unfortunately comes up short, and inadvertantly causes the oppostie effect. I get that too. Communicating the issues or potential issues with moving up the appointment before hand would have been better than trying to explain once he's already jumped the shark.

Still, I don't see any need for an apology on her end. As I see it, it was he who wasted her time, and money on that room. All inconveniences aside, he was there, and so was she, and even after being a dick, she was still kissing his ass and giving him the green light, even though ultimately it was it was he who caused those issues in the first place;  (except the side door thing - I never get the need for the side door - there is nothing incriminating or suspicious about a normal guy simply walking into a hotel and heading for the elevator...what do you girls think, we're gonna stop at the front desk and ask what floor they keep the hookers on?)

When my ol' lady ws escorting guys tried to pull this shit all the time, and frankly, under these circumstances, with the attitude he copped, he would have gotten told to go fuck himself. The fact that she acted on the humble in spite of his douche bag antics says something about her.

I'm talking about the BS people try to pull suggesting that what happened differs depending on your point of view. I'm talking about the rationalizing people do to support their delusional positions. Sure, sometimes there's plenty of blame on both sides - but more often than not, one party is flat out lying. And so on.

PS  If you didn't find my comment constructive, I'm hard-pressed to find a reason for you to care enough to voice your hostility.

He can't write a review if you two never met face-to-face but i'm sure he can backchannel is pissy a.s.s. off.

It was a miscommunication but he damn sure didn't make it easy on you  what a prick.   As soon as a man dares to begin yelling at me for no reason or won't let me speak that's where the call ends and for that you're much better than me.  I'm nice but I don't have the time nor patience to take shit from anyone esp if they haven't paid me yet (lol).  

He was a dick about the situation and if he hasn't met you he can't do a review and can't make some crap up.  

F*uck that guy (I said it ....and I hope he reads it).

-- Modified on 12/2/2011 11:55:25 PM

Exactly. It's just that easy.

Anybody, male or female, young or old, raises their voice out of line to me and I'm done with them. Obviously, I think everyone should do the same; zero tolerance for abuse.

Comic/songwriter Tim Minchin's "Pope Song" sums up how I feel about abuse (this song is about the cover-up of Priests but it's all the same):  

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kBrHr4EhOVQ (start 50 seconds in)

Notwithstanding your good intentions, I can understand the guys reaction but he went a bit too far.  It sounds like you did your best. What I still fail to understand with you providers however is why the hell do you insist on having guys come to a side door that requires you meet them there to let them in. Its more conspicuous than a guy just walking in the main entrance. There are video cameras at all the exits. Do you think a guy wants to be on tape or observed by hotel staff being escorted by a girl who has been observed doing that several times the same day? Some hotels will kick the escort out.  Just give the guy the fucking room number! Its way more discrete. The only exception might be when its late at night and its a Motel 6 that locks the front entrance at 10. Spend another 10 bucks and upgrade to a 3 star hotel.

Live and learn.

when they don't readily have one available.

I can honestly sympathize with the guy. I too would get ticked off if I was told to show at one location, drove a half hour to get there and then told to go to another location. If I were in his shoes, I might have simply said no thanks and canceled the appointment when told to go to the second location.

I know.. I know.. I know...

At home it is easier to have an apartment for an incall.  However, when you use a hotel for incall and you don't have appointments daily-you don't check in until you know you are going to have an appointment.  Cost effectiveness.    
It may have saved a ton of trouble if she would have said:  I don't have an incall just yet. I plan to be off of XXX and XXX, if you could give me a call in a few I will let you know for sure.  
Regardless of the situation one should never be disrespectful or threaten a person.

Kisses

maybe her only confirmed appointment, so the sequencing makes sense.

I completely agree that your proposed response would have been better. And in any event, ticked off or not (after all, no one is happy waiting/driving, etc), a CALM conversation would likely have been met with appreciation (picture her stress trying to solve the incall problem) and perhaps an offer of more time or a discount - then or at a future time.

1. Don't let a client rush you. The appointment was at 2:30 and he basically wanted to move it to 1:45. If you aren't comfortable that you can make the time, let him know that you can't see him earlier, or let him know that you will do your best, but may not be able to see him that early.

2. Don't let a problem compound itself. If you know that you have already inconvenience the client, go out of your way to make the rest of the experience as painless as possible. So your routine is the whole "go to the side door" thing, but in this situation, the surest way to make certain there was no issue is to give him the room number.

3. Seek positive confirmation that you have made amends. Make them say "that's okay", "I understand," "that will be fine" etc... Most people hate to be hypocrites, so if the say it's okay, they make themselves believe it's okay. For instance: Rather than saying "I had to go to another hotel" say "I hope you don't mind, but I needed to change hotels." without thinking, most wil reply "that's okay" or "Are you okay with coming in the side door?" instead of "meet me at the side door." The responses they give will generally guide their emotion.

4. You know why we are here. Use it to your advantage.  You have both time and femininity as ammunition to take on adversity. A simple "I know this was an inconvenience , but I'll make every effort to make it up to you once we are alone" or "I know I wasted a half hour of your time, so let me add some time to your appointment to compensate you?

Welcome to "The Hobby" Sasha! Ain't this fun!

I doubt it. I tried to call him back like thirty minutes later to  meet with him face to face and hopefully make ammends. No answer!

Undoubtedly there are THREE sides to every story, each parties version...and then what really happen. I'm well aware that peoples environments and personalities shape their views on events. The blind leading the bllind?!Well,  you are entitled to your's as well.

you were calm and collected. Just reading this thread tells me that you probably perpetuated the anger of the hobbyist.

Look, you came here ranting and insulting the guy, so I could just imagine how you acted and reacted at the time. Maybe others here are buying your innocent act, but not me.

Yes indeed; and I can understand the guy! I can get irritated and frustrated quite easily myself, But why?be crass and argumentative, and not let the person try to remedy the situation. Life is going to be full of inconveniences and mishaps...had he been forgiving I would have made damn sure to go out of my way to please him.

Thank you Missleah! Hugs right back at ya babe! I had to laugh thinking about  hives or a period popping up, I could have kicked myself for sitting on the phone that long, but for some reason I did feel obligated to...because I did after all have him go from one place to another, and I have been stood up before. But honestly he was rude from when he arrived at the first location, and that should have been my sign right there.Oh well, you live and you learn right!  Thanks for the words of wisdom!

Agreed, which was absolutely what I tried to do... hindsight is, as always, 20/20. I now know that I will have to let them know that if I get a hotel, chances are I can't check in until after 3 etc. etc.... It just got blown way out of proportion by being so rude when I'm trying to explain myself and make sure he's happy as well... It was nerve wracking!

Absolutely wonderful advice. Thank you!!!!

Kind sounds like that idiot who stalked Ginger lol. WTF guys, take a freaking chill pill once in a while. If your that hard up you can't tolerate a minor delay or complication, when it is obvious the girl is doing everything she can, well maybe it is time to just head on over to Scotland to buy a couple of sheep and then stay home.

FYI I am definitely going to give Sasha the benefit of doubt. Key here is that she was leaving VMs, she texts and calls 3 times, to which HE did not respond. Well f**k him then, obvious the communication problem was on his end, not hers. Yeah usually isn't the point that guys get frustrated about is when the girl does NOT answer? Clearly not the problem here. Don't mean to shill here, but of all the girls I have ever met or even just called, Sasha is truly one of the most open and engaging. She does not have a problem communicating, and it just is not her personality. So yeah the guy can come here and give us his side of the story, maybe then he can explain his math problems, or maybe why he was the one not answering? Maybe he can also explain why he thinks he has the right to tell some girl off when it was obvious she was doing everything she could to make this work.

Sasha, f**k him, don't let this incident get to you. That douchebag owes you an apology, and until then I would not worry about. Guys need to remember that the risks to providers are infinitely higher for them than it is for us. You see us at YOUR convenience not ours, and never think that somehow you owe us anything. Like that idiot who stalked Ginger a few weeks back, sometimes the problem resides in how some of these guys act, and you morons are the ones that make it difficult for everyone. Maybe sometimes some girls would not have a little attitude if they did not have to deal with so many hard up morons who should just stay home instead. Yeah, I'm in a pissy mood today, so what.

And as others have pointed out, there were some things you could have done differently but no one starts off knowing the best way to handle all these things.  Looks to me like you made every effort to make things work and he decided to be an ass.  I've been in his position a few times and I just roll with it as best I can.  Sometimes it just doesn't work out.  Goes with the territory.  Sometimes it does.  Usually my patience is rewarded with an excellent time, if not that day then on another.

....it was definitely not a shitty experience.  Will post a review soon, but Sasha has no need to worry about the bad day that happened.

I was about to post the exact same message, including "review coming".