How is it working out for you?

You may want to elaborate yourself if you feel like you lead a double life so others will join in. I will say that sometimes it kind of sucks, leading a double life that is.

The closest I've come is when a friend is over and starts to do an internet search on my laptop without asking, I have to swipe it and put them on the guest account or just do it for them to avoid any creeping eyes on the history in the URL bar or search engine...


Otherwise it works very well! I don't let my personal and promiscuous lives mix....

well hidden,  for the hobby stuff, looking and appointments. so far...ok

but they are consecutive.  We all have multiple lives simultaneously.  I have yet to meet a SOUL who doesn't have some sort of secret... Depending on the crowd, everyone behaves differently.  Everyone has several 'lives'.  We manage.

Until one of your male friends is skimming BP and makes the connection.

Posted By: AlastiNatalie

The closest I've come is when a friend is over and starts to do an internet search on my laptop without asking, I have to swipe it and put them on the guest account or just do it for them to avoid any creeping eyes on the history in the URL bar or search engine...


Otherwise it works very well! I don't let my personal and promiscuous lives mix....

I agree, I have several "lives" and I'm happy you're in one of them !!

Because my closest friends and my family know (( I have an awesome family))
And im blessed because they all support me ..
Most of my friends and all my family are liberal and believe in the decriminalization of prostitution and all that..
So when I decided to start working I talked to them about it to get their input, and i'm able to have pretty open conversations with them and my parents for that matter about that work.
They bring up safety concerns, but im pretty stringent about safety and security since I have been a PA, scheduler, screener for almost 3 years as well prior to working myself..  
I dont know if its really a double life for me as in my real life im pretty vocal and open about sex positive health practices and all that..
The one person I was concerned with finding out about it was my ex and he did and now its water under the bridge ...
So far so good for me

~Cat ,, meow meow xoxo

Perhaps she doesn't advertise on BP.  Perhaps she is a smart individual who knows how to be discreet about her business.  

I haven't been around long, but it seems to me that you can keep your private business PRIVATE if you take the appropriate precautions.  And I've come to learn in my short time that many in this business aren't in it because they are dumb.  

Perhaps I'm the one who made the connection.

I do something similar, only accessing hobby-related data in a linux virtual machine.  Easy, portable, simple to move between machines etc...

Almost precisely what I was going to add.  Who doesn't have many faces in life?  Even different groups of friends have a different mask to wear.

But then things fell apart, as will happen. It was due to incompatibility, not this thing of ours. That is still my secret.

I've found there is a relatively easy way to keep a secret. Don't tell anyone. You'd be surprised how hard that is for some people.

….I have always believed in living my life with integrity...meaning being the same on the outside as I am on inside.  I hope no one reading this thinks I am being judgmental toward anyone, because please believe I'm not.  What I write belongs to me and me only.  I understand the reason many in the hobby and other parts of life have to live a “double life”  NO judgment on any of you ladies and gents.  I disagree however with the notion that we all have different lives that we compartmentalize and HAVE to keep one part away from another.  We create that kind of life, it does not just happen.  I am in my 60s and have never lived like that.  If you have read my posts in the past you may remember I wrote about marrying a provider several years ago, it was 24 years ago in December.  But I was married before that.  I was a horn dog in my early 20s, but had met a wonderful young woman and fallen hopelessly in love and we got married.  Didn't have kids, (that came later with wife#2) but I loved this woman with all of my heart and never strayed.  She developed an aggressive cancer and died before she reached 30.  I was devastated of course, but in the years that followed I found the “hobby” (only we didn’t call it that back then).  I was very active seeing many extraordinary young women and was never shy about what I was doing or did I have the need to hide it.  I have been  fortunate to have always owned my own enterprises so never had an employer to hide my activity from.  I did fall in love with an exceptional young woman I was seeing professionally (yes, in the hobby) and I promised to give her anything she ever wanted in life and she finally agreed to marry me.  I  did not hobby and was not unfaithful to her.  We had 3 kids but eventually she got bored with monogamy and after 15 years, she moved on and I concentrated on raising my kids.  I  resumed my hobbying about 6 years ago, which I have done to this day.  My kids who are now adults know about my younger “girl friends”.  My daughters think it is quite funny (course they think I am getting senile...LOL).  Anyway, I can report that I have never had to lead a double life in all my years...about anything.  Lucky?  Maybe, but I have always believed in the power of the truth and living with integrity.  WE create the lives we live.  And no, I am NOT religious.  I consider myself  libertine. I don't think living with integrity is incompatible with the hobby, although marriage without an open minded partner?  Yes, it creates all kinds of struggles  with the hobby, hence all the double lives being juggled (and destroyed in many cases).  By the way, I do not think that the struggle between marriage and the hobby will be any less if prostitution becomes legal, in fact even though many of us yearn for this, it could make the marriage struggles much worse.  I will end this with what I started with, I make no judgments about anyone else and their circumstances, but I do think we can live a rich full life without it ever being a secret.  Living a double life is just too much work, imho, but I wish you all happiness, I have certainly had my share in this life!

-- Modified on 11/26/2012 10:31:55 PM

Well. I guess that thread's over.

It's great that you have made your life work for you in this manner but most people work for someone else and/or do not have a family or friends that would be accepting of being a hobbyist or escort.

Perhaps you're not.

...................we offer our experiences and opinions.  My life experience may not be relevant to you and I made myself very clear that it was not my intent to judge anyone who has a different outlook.  My post was not in response to yours, it was a response to the OP.  I do think this board benefits when posters share their own experience and I will not allow your arrogance, quoderat, to diminish mine.

.................... and alluded to this when I talked of having a good measure of luck in my life.  That said, we all have a hand in creating our circumstances and I hope that if nothing else my experiences may be food for thought.  I also think that the bonds of marriage heavily influence the views of family and friends.  If one is single it is much more acceptable to friends and relatives, imho, but I have  had family members (not my adult children) "turn up their noses" at my activities, I just don't care if they do, that's on them.  I also think the topic of the OP is a very good one.

I think it is cool that you can live like that, and don't need to hide anything. Interesting story, and thanks for sharing. You say your kids are okay with you seeing providers and your daughters think it is funny. I was wondering if they know that their mother was a provider? And if they do, how did they take that info when they found out. Just an honest question. Not bashing you or judging you.

A page and a half isn't a discussion, it's a soliloquy. You can't suck all the air out of the room with a virtual manifesto and then get upset about someone checking their virtual watch.

Yes I lead a double life and sometimes it kind of sucks.  It can suck because I am being hypocritical about integrity and honesty which are important to me.  Sometimes the lifestyle feels so exciting and adventurous.  I am amazed at the connections we can make in such a short time when we come together to pleasure each other.  Then sometimes I realize how much I would hurt my people if my second life were discovered.  I feel like I need this hobby to keep my sanity - a person needs touch in their life.  At the same time I wonder what toll the double life takes on my sanity.  

So far I can live with the sucky parts and will continue to hobby.

Thank you everybody for the conversation.  It helps to hear other's thoughts and feelings about this.

what I was going to say.  Also, in response to MnJohnny, I respect that.  Having kids and parents and other people that I care about in my life, I am as open as I am able to a point.  That point is found when I would cause harm to others.  It would not benefit my children to know what I do.  They are 4 and 7.  When they are older, I have no shame in telling them what I have chosen to do.  It's become quite a beautiful profession for me.  My parents would not be able to handle it.  I love them, and it would cause harm to them to know.  So, I feel obligated not to tell them.  It's not from shame but of love.  And that's just my story.  

as I've stated before, I don't have closed minded individuals in my life therefore nothing to hide.

Exactly, I could not have said it better. Well done!!

Posted By: TrinityLake

what I was going to say.  Also, in response to MnJohnny, I respect that.  Having kids and parents and other people that I care about in my life, I am as open as I am able to a point.  That point is found when I would cause harm to others.  It would not benefit my children to know what I do.  They are 4 and 7.  When they are older, I have no shame in telling them what I have chosen to do.  It's become quite a beautiful profession for me.  My parents would not be able to handle it.  I love them, and it would cause harm to them to know.  So, I feel obligated not to tell them.  It's not from shame but of love.  And that's just my story.