I agree when I'm contacted I feel she wants to see me and I am flattered.
I can't help but feel like I'm being treated like a chump. Ya know? Like I'm some sort of warm blooded ATM cash machine. I don't mind a notice of a special I guess, but last week I get this email from a provider that left the business a while ago saying she was back for a week. Do guys really line up for this kind of shit?
We all want to think these women are with us for our dashing good looks and charming personalities...lol! But at the end of the day, this is a BUSINESS. So in that respect, we are all human ATMs to one degree or another.
But just as you would not be upset if Target sent you an e-mail about a sale on toasters, I don't think you should be too upset about a provider reaching out. You always have the option of telling her you're busy, not interested, or just ignore/delete the e-mail entirely.
I personally would not respond to a solicitation e-mail because I have to be "in the mood" to hobby, but I'm sure some guys appreciate this type of communication.
-- Modified on 5/14/2014 7:00:36 AM
If you have seen her before and she sent you an email saying hey I'm back for a little while and would love to see you, that doesn't sound like a big deal. If she is harassing you ignore or block her email, there is no use in getting whipped up about it. As for being an ATM, it can feel like that. It sounds like your not interested in taking her up on her offer so again block or ignore. As for guys lining up, if she was good, sure there will be guys glad to hear from her for one last shot.
it happens that our chemistry is good. I was in the mood so I said yes. The experience was definitely GFE and --afterward I did not feel like I had lined up for some "kind of shit."
If I hadn't been in the mood or had the coin, I would have declined. It would have been no big deal. We would have seen each other another day.
If a kid from your neighborhood comes by and asks to weed your garden because he wants to go on a field trip, do you feel like a chump, ATM, or just part of the community?
Ghandhi's words do not always apply but they fit here:
“Nobody can hurt me without my permission.”
-- Modified on 5/14/2014 4:24:51 AM
If the provider contacted you saying she was in the mood to play some, obviously she had thought you were ok. Did she contact 100 other guys, who knows, but she did contact you. It's not like she's been hounding you. She sent one simple email about a special. It's your choice to take it or leave it.
Do you guys really think the only drive to providers is cash? Yes it's a business and yes they collect donations for doing it, but if it was only for the bank you carry, they wouldn't get wet, they wouldn't have orgasms and appointments would only be 15-30 mins. I normally don't get involved with these conversations, but shit guys, try to have a little positivity in your life for fucks sakes!
Thank-You Smilin, was beginning to feel a little bad there
, I rarely contact friends, but if I do, its because I really liked spending time with them, I mean REALLY like spending time with them, but certainly would not want to be viewed like the OP said. Yes, there is a donation involved- this is a business, but there is so much more to it also. 
I have never bugged someone over and over, but I think from now on anyone I feel is special, I will ask if its alright to contact them every now and then.
I agree with the point MsD is making... Which is more personal:
a. A "specials" announcement, "Hey everyone I have ever met, it's $50 off this weekend."
b. A personal note: "Hey, haven't seen you in a while, I can't stop thinking about that thing we did last time with the cheese whiz, the golf balls, a soup ladle, and your belt. I can't wait to see you again, hope you'll call me soon."
the cheese whiz, golf balls, and soup ladle. I was totally on board with a nice visual going (amongst other things) but then you added the belt and I got confused, a little nervous and you lost me. Give me time, I just need a little more experience and I can add the fourth and final piece to this kinky shindig.
How in the world ? A Soup ladle ? Cheese Whiz ? Oh my... Lmao ! Anywhore,
I was thinking it was the same thing on only one aspect of the OP...asking for money from people unsolicited via email or what have you.
IMO, if you aren't on a Newsletter she shouldn't be doing this but it sounds like you quite enjoyed her company...perhaps this is more like an advert and not so much what you think it is?
How about try being NICE instead of assuming every single woman thinks you're her personal ATM & doesn't give a shit about you at all? Because you know that's not true.
Now, don't get me wrong.
I do think it's a bit uncouth to assemble an email list and send mass messages without permission from the recipients and I definitely wouldn't send anything to someone unless I genuinely like their company( which there a a few *wink*)
On the other side of my business I would never in a million years send thank you cards to my members homes without consent because no one likes junk mail. Being considerate goes a long way.
I would count my blessings ....
Xo - V
The email I received seem to say "I need money, come see me now".
An email about a special seems to say "I want to make coming to see me now more enticing at the moment".
The difference being the customer oriented inflection.
If it's someone I have a connection with, then I really enjoy it.
The gal is running a business and it is not unusual for a business owner to advertise. Special or not. The goal is to get customers and make money. That being said, the way one advertises their business should occur in a way that is appropriate and beneficial to the business. Keep in mind this is a business model where the guys pay the gal to essentially go away after the conclusion of the hourly contract. In this case its a hard call to make for the lady.
If she is a smart business owner she should be selective of which of her previous customers she targets. I would think it would be clients who have used her service on more than a single occasion or at the least developed a connection early on that while not necessarily giving permission to access their outside life would have shown at least a connection that implied a desire for further contact on behalf of the dude. If she is not that business savvy she might just send out a mass email to every Hairy, Dick and John that has ever even considered crossing her threshold.
As with most email marketing , the easiest solution can be a simple opt out reply. Just let the gal know in a civil and polite way that you enjoyed her services yet would prefer to be put on her do not solicit to list. By that I mean keep her in mind for future business (Or not) but that you would rather not receive email advertising from the lass. That way you can keep a reference and the lady gains a bit of knowledge on who she can and can't market her services to.
In the grand scheme of things it isn't a big deal, doesn't need to be blown into a big deal if we all just be polite and play nice.
HMM..I don't know who you spend your time with, but I for one have never paid any of the ladies I've spent time with to leave. Even after they are gone they stay on my mind for a long time. When one of them reaches out me I don't feel targeted by a savvy business owner looking for a quick buck but rather pleased that she thought enough of me to want me to come back. While the financial aspect is an obvious part, it's only a part. My money is the same shade of green as everyone else's so I choose to believe there is another reason she reached out to me.
A lady you have chosen to be with in the past picked you as some one she would like to see again and you degrade her for that. I have had several ladies contact me because of the customers (yes we are customers) she has seen she selected me as someone she would like to see again.
It is a complement you dope...
If you said yes you already know she want to see you and wants to be will you. She did not contact the dirtballs she would rather not see. The last time I chipped in on one of these threads the issue was when is abuse abuse. one author said affirmatively " it is not abuse unless the person doing it intended it to be abuse. Period" are you serious !
Einstein said there are only two things in our experience that are with out end, they are the universe and human stupidity.
I agree when I'm contacted I feel she wants to see me and I am flattered.
flattered and a little excited. What could be more exciting that a beautiful woman who want to hop in the sack and then let you go, no strings. Even if I had not considered contacting her the fact that she reached out to me is a turn on. I think ladies who want to see you are the best of the best. The sex is great but the best part is sharing that experience with a girl who want to be there.
Being gone for a while, there is no way to know who still participates in the hobby...so to send emails out would be a bit nuts.
However, I do see times when it is okay to email "clients" (I don't like that word so friends). Some fella's ask to be emailed if you make it to their area or whatever. Also, when I used to tour a lot, I would ask if my friends would like to be notified when I planned to be back in town...I would typically ask that in my follow-up email following the appointment.
However, I don't think you should feel like a chump. I would like to think the person in question thinks highly of you or she wouldn't of sent an email.
To stop further emails...Just simply ask her not to email you. Communication is always key....
Welcome back Miss Leah. From a family that's endured the hardship of cancer more than once, I'd like to extend a virtual hug to you
Be safe and enjoy your tour!!
It was 1 email to let you know she was back to work. You have two choices basically ... either respond to her or ignore it. Don't let it ruin your day.
You send me an e-mail lady and I will feel treasured and appreciated!
So send me one!
I love it when I get personal emails from providers that I feel like I have connection with.
If I feel like I am being hounded, then not so much, I'd put a stop to that. If I feel like it's a "canned" bulk email that went to a lot of people, then I just delete it but it doesn't bother me. Calls and texts... not so much, I wouldn't like that. If our meeting didn't go very well, and it seemed obvious we just didn't connect, that make me more inclined to think of it as a the AMT machine you spoke of.
I think there are two very different kinds of hobbyists, and this difference shows a LOT on the boards here...
For some this is just some playtime on the side, it's all on the QT, there's no strings of any kind... You settle up at the end of the appointment and the case is closed, the "encounter" has ended and it's on with life. There is *nothing* wrong with this approach, I suspect most hobbyists are in this category.
For others, it's more about the connection, and getting to know an ATF, or a few faves, and developing an ongoing connection that transcends any one appointment. It's mostly "no strings", but there is one tiny, slender string, a mutual promise to cherish the time together, be open and revealing, and hold each other in high regard in our hearts... Connected as real lovers but none of the other trappings...
I am in that second camp, and so, getting a nice thoughtful email from a provider, that I haven't seen yet, or haven't seen in a while, is a nice thing for me... But again, only because (a) I am in that second camp, and (b) I have a secure private email.
That is where I reside.
I always respect providers, and as such, I won't give out her name.
I'm amazed as I read through the responses how much creative extrapolation was interjected.
Especially the cheez wiz, golf balls and a ladle! That was Portia! She can email me all day long
Whether the person wanted to see me, plus my money or just my money... it's nice to be on someone's short list.
If I didn't want to be contacted, I'd simply let that person know.
It all depends. Sometimes I ignore, sometimes I respond, it depends on the lady, price, and my mood. It is one way of keeping in touch with UTR or retired providers who may have moved away and sometimes come back to town (unannounced). I just wish Catherine the Great would email
You're free to ignore it or even ask her not to send more. While she wasn't advertising a special, she was advertising she would be back for a while. Unless the way she worded it was rude or unpleasant somehow, I don't see why this is a problem for you. I would guess she'd like to get enough bookings without having to publicly advertise so she reached out to guys she had seen before.