Today I just read a review someone posted about me that just made my jaw drop.
He pretty much says everything nice about me and then ends it with "she's too fat".
If you are a non-vip you have no idea that he mentioned how he would come back but because there wasn't a vibe between us which seems to have what pissed him off to say such a hateful and hurtful remark about me.
My first review I was a size 22. Today I'm a 16. Marilyn Monroe was a 14. It says on my description that I am heavy.
In prior reviews it has been mentioned that I am a bigger girl. So it is no surprise when you come see me.
I'm wondering first of all, who this guy is, and second of all, is it possible on TER to have him strike that last comment.
I will say that alot of my clients are non-vip's and I feel this guy is personally trying to bring me down for not being too into him. Can somebody help?

One man's fat is another man's curvy.  He said his piece and no one says you have to provide services for him again.  Any other provider out there who is concerned about his attitude (and uses TER reviewer status as some sort of reference) is also now on guard.

Just another day in the biz.

I like the way you roll!

Thanks... I did return to my reviews and see that his alone shouldn't get me upset or worried. He's a douche.

Even under the best of circumstances, you can't make everybody happy.  If I am going through someone's reviews and see something way out of the ordinary like that review, I usually ignore it.

Making a health conscious decision to lose weight and then to stick to it is sometimes not an easy thing to do.   Seeing something like that written about you does not always make it any easier.    I know because I have been in your shoes....am in your shoes.  

When I started in this biz April, 2008, I weighed in at 278 lbs and was a size 26/28 and was considered a SSBBW by many.   Today, I am a healthier and happier 211 lbs and size 16/18.    I am not ashamed of that fact .....and neither should you.   Be proud of the progress you have made.  Stay on the healthy track you have set for yourself and the healthy mindset and to hell with what the naysayers say.   If you ever need a workout buddy, give me a call.   I've joined the gym and have been trying to go for an hour or more each day.  Today, instead of the gym, I walked at the park for over an hour.  I am loving working up a sweat and would enjoy even more having someone to do it with.   Encouraging each other could be a tremendous help for all involved!  The more the merrier!!  

Anyway, basically, I'm saying...do not worry about one bad review!  The good guys will review your other reviews and see that you are a keeper and exactly what you advertise yourself to be.  

Hugs, Belinda

Because it is a bad review they have an axe to grind? Could it be they just didn't like the service? Oh no not that.

Services are subjective. Who cares. You can't please everyone just like a director cannot please everyone with a movie.

Big deal.

Make sure to lambast whoever it is though because of one's opinion!

Get over it.

One dink with an axe to grind can't take away your awesome skills.  You're still one of the best in town.

-- Modified on 8/24/2010 2:51:09 PM

First of all, your ad only shows your face. Perhaps a full body shot would reveal how big you are. More then likely the reviewer was surprised.

Secondly, you called the reviewer a douche for calling you fat. That could do more damage then the review itself. Suck it up and quit bitching.

That is terrible, I'm sorry this happened to you.
Some people are vindictive.
Marilyn was 14 and beautiful,  I think Sophia Lauren was also in that range.
If ter can't help, just let it ride, you say you make it clear you're not a twig in your ad and anyone with logic should be able to identify and put it all together.
I personally don't like the fact the provider can't respond to reviews for this specific reason.
It would seem nice to be able to respond to reviews.
Keep your head up and keep getting good reviews, I've seen ladies get bad reviews and still gentlemen will see them, hey any publicity is good publicity, I hear.

Although the pic is a face shot, it is obvious she is a voluptuous young lady. I believe he knew exactly what he was walking in to. In terms of calling you "ugly?!" Let me assure you miss lady the woman I saw in the pic is a far cry from being that! Blow him off! Many men will feel insulted on your behalf at his lack of manners. After seeing this post, I have no doubt that he'll be getting a lot more unanswered calls from providers as well. Your other reviews out-weigh his opinion & that is what the other gents will be taking seriously. I see no genuine damage here. You will be fine. BTW, congrats on the weight loss. I only hope you are doing it for yourself, opposed to trying to meet-up to the social expectations.

XXOO!!
Leann

You cannot get upset at a guy for a review saying you were too fat for him when all you show is a face pic. Massage or not. The guy still has to get turned on doesn't he?

I am sure you are a nice person. I am sure you are over it. But I am glad these reviews still get posted. Because everyone has their right to their opinion whether you like it or not, and I am appalled at the amount of people who said the guy just had an axe to grind.

Not every review has to be one giant glowing advertisement. It can go the other way too. And if it does, it doesn't automatically mean they have an axe to grind. Reviews are just that, subjective. And there is nothing wrong with an opinion as long as it is justified and not over blown in accordance with the person writing it. Some people like Size 14. Some people don't.

In this case, with your ad, there is no way to tell as you do not list any measurements or have a body shot. So maybe a little proactive wording on your part might alleviate this in the future.

Although I am now dying to know what "type of people" you don't want to attract by saying you are BBW?

Yay! Belinda!! I'll shoot you an email! Hopefully we have the same membership! lol

Thank you for kindness and support!

I was over it an hour after my post. Thanks.

I agree, we should be able to respond to our reviews.

LOL! What makes you think I called him a douche for calling me fat? I was over it in the sentence before calling him a douche. Sorry you missed it. Like an hour after my first post. I don't need to put full body shots as a massage girl on ter when all your information is on my page. I don't put myself out there like that because if I did. I would be bringing in what I do not want. Everything is with my hands. And that's the idea.

Thanks sister.

When I go for a massage, I don't choose them by the looks of their hands. I choose them because of what they look like. Men are visual. The reviewer was disappointed in your appearance. If you would have showed a full body pic, the reviewer may have just bypassed you. He would have no grounds to complain about your size if he would have known up front. Get it now?

If you come on here seeking sympathy support and advice because you are offended by a reviewer's comments, I think you have an obligation to fully and honestly report the offending comment.  The reviewer did not simply says "she's too fat," he said "The only thing stopping me from going back is that I do not find her attractive because she is too fat."  He doesn't just make a broad statement that "she's too fat," but makes the far more limited statement that he does not find you attractive because of your weight, and limits his criticism further by saying that your weight is "the only thing stopping me from going back."

If you are seeking support you should come to the discussion with clean hands.  I think you owe an apology to the readers of this thread.  

Yes, you certainly can respond to reviews.  You have the right and I can understand feeling the injustice of a review that is a result of someone else's unreasonable attitude or expectations.  I just wouldn't recommend it.  As a hobbiest (hobbyer?) I look at TER in this way: While providers certainly have access and the opportunity, it is first and foremost a forum for the consumer to comment on and rate the providers of the service.  When a provider responds to a poor review or unflattering discussion board post (anywhere from commenting to blowing a gasket), that response may often be factored into our buying habits.

In short (too late), the response to a bad review or a criticism can turn into a spate of bad publicity.  There are those who espouse the theory that no publicity is bad, but that may be less than accurate in this industry where the consumer is looking for a brief escape from sexual / romantic reality.  Someone complaining is a little too close to reality.  We want pleasant, compliant (or in the case of BDSM - non-compliant), scintillating, entertaining, courtesans; ladies who provide an oasis from the sexual frustrations of real life.  Hence my objection to the term GFE (LS - Lover Simulation is better in my opinion).

I understand the desire to fire back.  As a know-it-all-asshole, my tongue is metaphorically mangled on a day to day basis as a result of my personal cost / benefit analysis.  Nonetheless, the internal question must be eternally asked:  "Will I benefit by letting my mouth / keyboard fingers take the lead here?"

Consider the blowback from Ms. Kristin's responses to NCNS comlaints.  Regardless of her true opinion and the facts of each situation (known only to the principles), the average business advisor would have counseled keeping her trap shut.

When a provider is granting me a great GFE (LS) experience, is she really thinking "Wow.  Here I am, 23 years old, and I've finally met the chubby 50 year old man of my dreams?  I'm so lucky!"

Of course not.  It is acting.  Similarly, when there is a posted complaint about service, the provider should respond (if she responds at all):  "Ooohh.  I'm so sorry, sweety.  I'll never do it again.  Please come back and pay me the same amount again.  It'll be so wonderful for you this time."

Then laugh, go to the bank, and deposit the cash.  We're men.  It'll work.

To me the purpose of reviews is to help a person make an informed choice.  When I see a review like that I always check more of the providers reviews and wiegh them all.  Certainly nothing against Drie because I"ve never saw the lady, but it has always seemed to me that a lady that is allowed to erase a review that she doesn"t like is like letting her OK them in advance.  Like I said this is not aimed at Drie.  Believe me I am no Gods gift and am always gratreful that a ladfy doesn"t go screaming from the room.   I think all reviews shoild be taken with a grain of salt, but we should be able to see them.  I think I can tell when a man has an axe to grind and when he just didn"t click with the lady.  Hope I didn"t piss anyone off.  I didn't mean to.

Don"t know why I"ve never been aware of Drie before, but after spending some time on her reviews I think I'll try to see her my next time in the cities.  I have been looking for a regular massage lady.  Hope she"s not mad after my earlier post and will see me.  To me this is how the review board is supposed to work.  One bad review shouldn"t take a lady off your list of interesting people if the other reviews don"t support it.

Everyone gets a ding now and again, don't sweat it

He was disappointed in me not being into him in which he attacked my physical appearance. At least that's what seemed to be obvious to me.

"You can tell she takes pride in trying offer a good massage and get you to feel relaxed. She has a nice personality too - something you don't always find in her business. That almost makes me want to go back and see her. But when she was giving me a **** *** I felt she was just going through the motions and I didn't feel any physical attraction what so ever towards her." This is why I feel he attacked my physical appearance so harshly... I he felt I wasn't into him. Yeah I'm bigger but I'll be damned if I'm straight up ugly. Paalease!

Yeah I have no idea who put my ad on cityvibe and linked it to my page... I just looked at it. I've never even been on cityvibe before.. That picture is super old. In fact I don't want my ad on cityvibe at all. I'll have to check on that and get it taken care of.

"This is why I feel he attacked my physical appearance so harshly... I he felt I wasn't into him."  
It's very difficult to debate why you "feel" that "he felt" something about you.  If you wish to make statements, based upon your imagination, there's no need to go any further.  I quit.  You win.  

Don't sweat it Drie!!There are many more of us guys that think you are great person and
a wonderful massage giver.Hope to see you soon when I can find time.
JD

This thing has been discussed ad nauseum, but I for one am still bothered by him being called a douche.  You complain about him being personal, and yet you turn around and are even worse.  I think people that live in glass houses should not throw stones.  


Re: Shrug it off and let it go
Thanks... I did return to my reviews and see that his alone shouldn't get me upset or worried. He's a douche.

I will never understand why hobbyists make a choice and then complain about their choice on the same website has more than enough info to prevent the bad, misinformed choice.  The thing I focus on is whether the provider is misrepresenting herself in her advertising.  The question I would ask the reviewer is: "Why did you pick her vs. someone who fits your taste better?"  Some guys did think Marilyn Monroe was fat.  Fortunately, those guys represent a minority.

People getting offended at being called fat, people getting offended that people got offended at being called fat, people getting offended the fat offenders are being called douches, people getting offended at no hands being in a photo!!??!

I know expect some variations & tastes vary.   I don't think you can get the review edited unless he requests it.  A lot of bad blood can get worked up that way.   I think you would be better served with body shots on your web site or ads...  even bikini shots...  rather than leave it up to the imagination.  

I read "off" reviews carefully...  but the surrounding good ones as well.  In general one off review in a page of good ones is not reason for me to turn away.  In this case, I'd look for picts & make up my own mind.
skb

I have seen Dria  all I know is she is a great massage therapist.But the person who put up that review did not have to say it like he did.There are better words to use.I like Dria I love her curves if I seen her on the street I would take a second or third look.But then again that's just me I love a thick women.If you read this Dria I will be back to see you.The best hands in the massage world.After having two back surgery's.I know what back pain is.When I left your studio I felt great for weeks.Still now I don't know why am not seeing you every week.

Im surprised no one has said anything about your comment on Cityvibe. They get there ads from here hun. I argued with a gent once on that I didnt have one when in fact I did. I'm not sure how the whole thing works, but you can call then and they will remove it.

I too get mixed reviews. Am I fat or am I curvy? IMO opinion I am getting fat and have since started a diet. OTOH I have clients that say NO NO NO dont loose any weight.

I know it hurts when they do as this man has done, but there is another that will contact you soon who will be head over heelz about you and your services. I recently had a man in another state tell me that I had mis-represented myself. I was livid and in shock to say the least. I have a stellar rep and would never do such a thing. I asked how I did and he replied I looked NOTHING like my photos. I was well who in the %&*& do I look like then. I knew this wasnt right and in my own lil sneaky way asked him some questions. Turns out he had only been hobbying for about 6 to 9 months and had already had 60 something conquests. I just took it as he had some score to settle with some woman and I was the target of the night!!

I feel very fortunate in that my reviews are very accurate. There are a couple that state I was their flavor or not as tone as they prefer, but I havent read one yet that says anything negative about my services or my attitude.

We all have at least one review coming to us. I got mine I think about a year ago on E.com and I responded to it. Nuff said on that. Let it go my love and keep on keeping on. Do not be afraid to show your curves because believe me there are plenty of men who want spinners and those that dont, want YOU!

I categorize hobbyist in two ways, The gents who want centerfolds and those who want real, down to earth type of gals. The latter IMO are the ones for me. We have fun and can get freaky. There are no pretenses and not only do we appreciate them, but we enjoy them. Who cares if they are 50, 60, or 70, just as long as its good times!

Just an FYI, you may loose clients if you loose to much weight in their eyes. It really does work both ways trust me.

in one of my recent reviews some guy basically said I wasn't pretty... Wow, really?? Me not pretty?? So I completely understand how you are feeling.. People say don't worry about these things but it does tend to bother you.. It does me at least... The worst thing in my case is the guy said he would not repeat, but has contacted me several times to set up another appt... I kindly declined.. In the last email I said: "Dude, I will not be seeing you again. Remember, I am not pretty and I am sure there are plenty of ladies out there you find pretty." He tried to apologize but the damage was already done.. Good thing I have other people boosting my ego.. Lol...
But hey, it sucks when people say negative things.... I could understand if provided info. and pic's were not accurate.. When they are, I see no reason to complain.. You knew what you were getting yourself into and there are plenty of options out there...
Sometimes things aren't fair and some gent's, just aren't gent's... You will forget all about it in about 2 or 3 good reviews...

. . . your worst appearance rating is a 7.  How is that "not pretty?"  If I decided to review a provider and let everyone know that, in my opinion, she wasn't pretty, I'd rate her far lower.  That's the odd thing about many reviews;  some women, who by the description didn't do anything particularly notabey, are given a performance rating of 8 or higher, and you are an example of a provider whose lowest appearance rating is a 7, yet one of those then described you as "not pretty."  Go figure.

True that! I think I have a couple of 5's. IMO the rating system isnt fair for LMT's/RMT's. Heres why,,, I have people come from different advertising venues and some of those are vanilla places. I even have two websites one vanilla and the other uhm Blazing hot!!! Ok, so a guy comes to see me unknown and thru a vanilla venue. I'm completely dressed in massage clothes etc... Then a verified gent schedules and I may just show up at the door in stockings, thong matching bra, and of course high heels and or rare occasions heelz and just a towel. Won't do that with an unverified gent because it could just be LE.....

We all know first impressions go a long way. I have gents that prefer me in no make up vs tons of it on. Bottom line is that you can't please everyone all the time. IMO dont even try beyond just being yourself because that in itself will carry you father and will gain you so much more.  

If your lowest appearance rating is a 7,,, hunny your doing better than me. I think I'm all that even at a 5 LOL.

As with my bad review elsewhere, he came to me unverified and had his session and then turned around and reviewed me on a P4P site. I know in my situation it was case of a haggler who thought he was going to get me back. ALLLL my fellas that read that emailed me and laughed at the whole thing, including my comments back to the reviewer.

The day that this becomes nothing more than a job I QUIT!