A new local provider asked for my full name in order to see me along with the usual screening info. I refused and she told me that it is standard practice around the country and that no self respecting provider would see someone without that info. It was a deal-breaker for both of us. She said that it reflected the quality of the providers that I am seeing. I personally don't know what common practice is nationally but I not would give my full name under any circumstances. How do hobbyist and providers feel about this here in MN? I've never had another provider ask for that info here and I have 92 reviews.
...for her name. If she wants yours would she give hers?
or what ever information she feels she needs. You have the right to provide the information you feel comfortable with. Looking at your reviews, you already know whether or not you have to give your full name to see great ladies. Anyone who would say that with regard to some of the ladies you have seen may not be worth your time anyway. If that's a deal breaker, the deal should be broken.
Was she willing to give you her full name in return? I'm guessing no... One quick google search on my name and a provider could extort me until I had nothing left... I don't know what fantasy world she live in. I've only had one highly rated provider require that of me and I simply told her no thanks. There are more amazing providers in this town than I can possibly see in the next several years so there's no point in putting myself in such a vulnerable position.
I have known the full names of a lot of my providers with whom I've maintained multi-year relationships.
No. Joined P411 and have had no problem here or in several other cities around the country. Full name never has been requested. In my opinion it doesn't seem to be a practice used by all providers around the country, but probably varies by the individual provider and the circumstances. So deal breaker for me. Too many other choices out there
But Ray, you are a member of P411 and no doubt Oks as well as reviews I would assume, I didn't look before I wrote this haha. Big difference. J. xxxoo
Who is the provider in question?
No Self-respecting Provider would see someone without knowing their full name?? really???
When they've got a long list of references to vouch that the guy is safe to see?
I personally don't require full names from clients unless they are total newbies. That's interesting that this new lady would lump all ladies who don't "require" full names in to a category labeled "Providers With No Self-Respect" really?? And then to actually put that in an email to you? um, maybe she didn't want to see you and just said that as a way to let you down. J/K ! 
and Standard Practice? wow, guess I didn't' get the Memo on that. wtf, I pay my dues to the National Center for Providers and I didn't' get that Memo? I want a refund or something. MN Ladies, did anyone else not get that memo?
wow, that's just , um, I don't even have the right word for it and still be Nice. So I will remain nice. BUT, IT IS HER own Business and she can Do things how SHE wants to for HERself. and that's just the way it goes. Good for YOU, for not disclosing any info you don't want to.
I have certainly heard of women running their businesses like that.
For Me, When a prospective client has solid references, that just makes no sense. But, that's just me.
GOOD THING we can all do things the way we want to for ourselves, right?
God Bless America and all the Ships at Sea!
Portia
-- Modified on 2/22/2014 7:00:32 PM
I don't know the "quality" of this "new provider" but I DO know there is no higher quality Woman than you Portia.
I also know that over the 8 or nine years I've used this site I have met many wonderful well known ladies here and have NEVER been asked for my full name.
if anything goes wrong, you'll end up on this ...
www.nationalblacklist.com
as this one has done in the past!
I have given my full name to a provider for screening, and I understood the reason for it, and I felt comfortable doing it. I was just starting out, with no references. I understood that she needed to protect herself. I also understood that she was sharing a lot of herself with me. Yes, she could have tried to blackmail me. I could also have made life difficult for her. But I knew that she wouldn't, because she was a well respected provider with many positive reviews and references.
So I guess I'm saying that, depending on the circumstances, I don't think it's strange or off limits for a provider to ask. Maybe she got spooked about something. Maybe there's something completely external to you and your interaction to her that has prompted her to be extra cautious. And maybe you won't feel comfortable providing your name to her. That's ok; there's nothing wrong with that. But there's also nothing wrong with a provider asking.
Consider yourselves $0.02 richer.
...is getting really bad advice from someone she looks to as a mentor. Maybe she needs to reach out to a more seasoned and savvy established Provider for wiser advice on how to make this work well for both parties.
I think it is reasonable for a lady to ask for the gent's name. But, I also think it is reasonable expectation for a man with a long list of reviews to have earned his stripes and not be required to give his full name. I think it all depends on the situation. Is the guy new? Are the ladies he has reviewed new or not known to the provider? Did the lady catch you in a lie? These are some of the situations where she might want to know more than your TER handle.
So I guess I'm saying that, depending on the circumstances, I don't think it's strange or off limits for a provider to ask. Maybe she got spooked about something. Maybe there's something completely external to you and your interaction to her that has prompted her to be extra cautious. And maybe you won't feel comfortable providing your name to her. That's ok; there's nothing wrong with that. But there's also nothing wrong with a provider asking.
Consider yourselves $0.02 richer.
And just which idiot has the list? I think you meant "idiots list" with no apostrophe. Don't sweat it, though, that 6th grade grammar is tough stuff. Good work showing your stripes. I hope lots of providers see what a gem you are. Take care.
STFU, grammar bitch, a lot of us type on our phone.
Okay, okay, so let me just make sure I have this straight . . . you try to call me an idiot with no provocation but can't get the words quite right (ironic, no?), and THEN, by way of excuse you explain that you were typing on your phone (which makes no sense, btw, because on your phone you actually have to push MORE buttons to use the incorrect apostrophe). Which means you use your phone to access this website -- not the TOR browser, but your phone -- the electronic device that can be irrefutably linked to your "real" identity and tracks your location. For the sake of the ladies I hope you're pretty, because you sure aren't smart.
I have a pre-paid phone dumb ass. Your just another grammar bitch, go and correct some paper. Not all of us have the time or desire to type everything as it should be, sometime we reply to boards from a meetings too.
You must have a stupid ass phone, because if yo u mistakenly saved a (mistake)word, it can auto correct next time.
I've very, very seldom been asked for my full name and this provider's assertion about the 'quality of providers' is not supported by anything I have ever heard of being typical, either here in MN or elsewhere in the country.
I had the same request in the last week from a new provider in town, but gave her other information instead, including some P411 and TER whitelist, telling her she could call any of the ladies listed as a reference. I offered to meet her at a neutral location before our meeting and said I'd show her my driver's license if I had to, but no email with my name and nothing before we met. All that made her feel more comfortable. I don't know if she contacted my references, but we met and didn't need to advance meeting or license. Had a great time, too. My guess is she's getting bad advice and talking with her about alternate options may do the trick.
I agree with what everyone else has said- she's got the right to do whatever makes her comfortable, but I think she's going to find out her request isn't the norm and isn't going to get her the business she wants.
In an attempt to arrange an appointment with a sexy and fun provider, I have even offered up my LinkedIn profile. I know that would send a shutter through most seasoned hobbyists, but I trust this individual
...is why does she needs it with that many references?
She doesn't unless there is an alternative motive....
Probably better to disclose who the provider is to be honest...
E
That's the issue I have ... Yes she can ask, expect, demand all she wants and she has the right but to ASSUME anyone who uses other methods is less quality than herself is cocky and disrespectful to the many amazing local ladies here who use various ways of screening!
Not a smart way to start out ... The advice or information she has been given is incomplete. I would suggest that you advice her to contact another seasoned local provider for other perspectives on screening.
proper way to screen a new client with no references.
and no reviews writtten.
And still, isnt it ok for a provider to ask whatever she needs
to feel comfortable with meeting a complete stranger.
I mean seriously, her life and safety is very important....
I think we all screen differently and should not be judged
on the way, one goes about doing things.
whoever she is, I personally see nothing wrong with what she did.
My Opinion.
Karley
Karley I don't wanta sound like a jerk here....... But some guys will turn everything you just said into a full circle about being comfortable and the safety issue. It is a big can of worms pretty much.
The hobbyist has the right to refuse to supply the requested info
I stated my opinion and I stand by it.
Period Point Blank
there is nothing wrong with wanting to know
Exactly who you are meeting and giving yourself to...
If any of you were around before the internet you probably remember answering some rather intimate questions and sometimes even more once you arrived. After that you were good to go.
Yeah, like, may I see your drivers license lol
we always asked for that.
this i know, ive been around.
and no one had an issue ever!!!!!!
[quote
Back then it was kind of standard. I was denied once on an initial visit. I was naked on the bed and she was sitting in an armchair in almost naked. She mostly was asking me what services I wanted and what I liked. Then she said that because I was new I wouldn't get any service, but that on my next visit I would be treated well. She kept her word and I saw her about half-dozen times before she moved on.
I have multiple ways I screen.
As long as I know the gentleman is not a killer or a cop I don't care if his name is Fred, John, Ringo or Steve.
On the other hand, some gentlemen I DO want their full name. It is all about the comfort level of the PROVIDER you're trying to bone.
If she is asking for more then you want to give move on.
If she charges more then you want to PAY move on.
No one is forcing you to give your name, you don't have to see her. In turn she can allow anyone she wants/CHOOSES to touch her body.
I for one don't give a flying fuck if you have 3, 94, 500 reviews; ldm -I would never see you. There is no personal information that you could provide that would make me change my mind about seeing you.
'Relax, it's just sex'
Samantha Goo
Agreed, there is this thing called a DNSL that we all have, well most of us just as i'm sure you guys do as well.. If someone contacts me that's on my DNSL i ignore them period. She may have just wanted to make up some excuse not to see you.. My DNSL includes hobbyist whom have shown poor behavior on TER, people I've screened with horrible record and people who blow up my inbox over and over and over. Not sure why my original post was pulled will try to re post.
Her comment on other providers, does anyone KNOW she has said this? I mean anyone can say anything right?? And even if she did, yeah sure its rude, but am i going to let it bother me? Hell no.. why? Because i know i'm a fantastic provider regardless of what comes out of someones mouth. And ima just keep it real.. Talk is cheap, words are words move on... she probably didn't even mean it. Shes new guys give her a break.. Everyone was new at a point, most didn't start new here. Hunny again if your reading this brush it all off to the side, sweep it up and throw it in the trash. You do what makes you feel safe!
As long as I know the gentleman is not a killer or a cop I don't care if his name is Fred, John, Ringo or Steve.
On the other hand, some gentlemen I DO want their full name. It is all about the comfort level of the PROVIDER you're trying to bone.
If she is asking for more then you want to give move on.
If she charges more then you want to PAY move on.
No one is forcing you to give your name, you don't have to see her. In turn she can allow anyone she wants/CHOOSES to touch her body.
I for one don't give a flying fuck if you have 3, 94, 500 reviews; ldm -I would never see you. There is no personal information that you could provide that would make me change my mind about seeing you.
'Relax, it's just sex'
Samantha Good
It made me Smile Really Big. Loved it.
As long as I know the gentleman is not a killer or a cop I don't care if his name is Fred, John, Ringo or Steve.
On the other hand, some gentlemen I DO want their full name. It is all about the comfort level of the PROVIDER you're trying to bone.
If she is asking for more then you want to give move on.
If she charges more then you want to PAY move on.
No one is forcing you to give your name, you don't have to see her. In turn she can allow anyone she wants/CHOOSES to touch her body.
I for one don't give a flying fuck if you have 3, 94, 500 reviews; ldm -I would never see you. There is no personal information that you could provide that would make me change my mind about seeing you.
'Relax, it's just sex'
Samantha Good
You always make me smile Ms. Good. My feelings exactly and I have observed many providers contact forms on their websites asking for "name" what is that supposed to mean? For the most part if I am familiar with the hobbyist, they have a good fair amount of reviews or are also a member of P411 or whitelisted, I may skip asking for a full name, but if I have never heard of them before, they are a newbie, they only have a few massage references that have no reviews or much of an identity anywhere I will ask. I hope I don't get slammed here but I have explained to some that apply, most are very willing though, that it is a criss/cross, when you meet me at any one of my incalls , you now know the location, address, maybe even more and would be easy to find out more if you were that type of person, so what is the problem if I hardly have any other information to go on about you? On the flip side, there are some clients that have more then a few reviews and are whitelisted that include full name and work identity right on their letterhead to me- I know, I know- leave it to me to throw a wrench in the tricycle wheel on a Sunday in here, but the bottom line is keeping ME and YOU safe. Shoot away now , but I have stuff to do, I will check occasionally. Love you Sam~
Could someone answer me though about contact forms and the question name? or even full name? thanks! J.
There shouldn't be much of a hassle, though when i started 7 months ago i did require full name etc due to having NO knowledge on how the reference system works and not knowing any of the lady's i now know.
With that said, if shes truly new she may just need a little help, for someone to maybe explain to her how it works (like a amazing provider taught me).. But if that's the only way she feels safe that's honestly up to her and up to the client to give the information..
When i did require fist and last names 3 out of 10 would fork it up WITH having references.. Again... I had no idea on how references worked.
5 months later, i only require full name for new friends WITHOUT references. Which is standard..
The only way you have to give me a full name is if your references saw you over 9 months ago.. The more recent the better.. and that's just my 2 cents..
You guys please, as being new myself give the girl a break, its hard being the new girl (i still am) but freshly new is a whole nother animal. From all of the story's I've heard from well known well respected providers, it took some of them years to figure things out... Remember we are only human, humans fuck up.. Let it go.. I personally know how hard it is to try to come back from making newbie mistakes, and some people here can be extremely judgmental and not look at it as a mistake, a simple mistake.. We grow and learn from our mistakes.. I hope no one took that the wrong way, nore was i saying anyone's being judgmental on this thread if you feel that way that's a personal problem. I'm stating my experiences. A doctor doesn't become a doctor with in a week, hell even a year everything takes practice and hard work. Let the girl figure things out, give it a few months or even a year.
I'm just saying, being new is HARD any little mistake I've made has blown up and people still talk, :oh well brushes off shoulders TALK IS CHEAP: and if your reading this, don't let anything ANYONE says get you down, PERIOD do what you feel comfortable, if you need any advice though i'm still new hit up my inbox.
Love and happiness
And that goes for both providers and hobbyists alike.
I've been at this for 36 years and have always used my real name. I provide any personal details they want as long as they do the same. When I started this I knew that the risk of being caught was real and accepted that risk. At times I've encountered providers in public when accompanied by my wife. We never made sustained eye contact, but usually talked about it in our next session. I've never been betrayed by a trusted provider.
You're welcome, Ms. Blu. Call me Bruno.
Wow!
I had no idea I was doing it all wrong over the past 15 years without an issue by just needing a couple provider references or just you having some verifiable reviews P411 or otherwise.
Does not know what they're even talking about and if they're that paranoid they need to not even bother being in this hobby .
No one needs to have your full info .
Xoxo V
Knowing what I know about you I don't trust any of your claims here & I hope in the event you have PM'd her identity to anyone here they are wise enough to take your claims with a grain of salt. The number of whitelist referrals vs the number of reviews you have speak volumes to anyone with 1/2 a brain.
Now we have a predetermined whitelist to review ratio as decreed by our lordess of the board Leann?
Any experienced provider who thoroughly screens knows that a low ration of WL referrals in comparison to the amount of reviews is a red flag & warrants more in depth investigating. It's not a deal breaker but it is & should be a clue there MAY be issues to be concerned about & act as incentive to dig deeper.
Depending upon the provider, which means highly respected, well reviewed, I have no problem revealing my full name.
And what I meant by "No one needs your full info ." I was meaning anyone that can do a simple search wouldn't want to see him even if they were desperate anyway so she probably dodged a bullet in this case .
a. you know the answer to your question
b. you're using the board to pressure a new provider
c. grow up
Or give out her exact incall location without any regards to her safety... Like he usually does.
b. you're using the board to pressure a new provider
c. grow up
b. you're using the board to pressure a new provider
c. grow up
If she's ever caught you can bet she'll be handing your info over to cut a deal.
How many cases have you heard of this happening?
In all my years I've never heard a SP rolls on her clients.
LDM knows why many ladies will not see him
The PM's he's sent me regarding this thread is exactly why I will put someone on DNS .
In all my years I've never heard a SP rolls on her clients.
LDM knows why many ladies will not see him.
The fact that ldm has such a bad reputation despite having so many reviews should demonstrate why some ladies require more information. I have no problem giving my real name to a lady I would like to see and because I am a gentlemen and never behave badly, I do not fear any repercussions. ldm obviously does not behave very well based on many of the comments I’ve seen and it’s probably because he knows that no one has his real world information and he can walk away without consequence, regardless of what he tries to pull on unsuspecting providers. I think ldm did a great job at validating this provider's screening requirements by starting this thread.