I'm surprised at the candor of providers' responses to Jchan's question below.

The hobby flourishes on well-defined boundaries and lack of ambiguity in the nature of the relationship.  Conventional relationships are mired in ambiguity:  will she or won't she?  He loves me, he loves me not.  We go to the hobby for a clear deal and lack of complications.  Hey, there ain't nothin' ambiguous about a Franklin; there's nothing ambiguous about a stiff member.

So why go there?  Ladies?  Gents?

.... Is for the reason you question me asking. One could imagine in the volume of clients some have seen, that we are all like customers at the bakery on a Saturday morning. We so often pick the provider and they play along in the session. Providers are human and humans do things like choose what to like and not like. It is nice to know that providers find some of us intriguing. I am pleased that many of ones on my list were the ones to respond.  

For some the "wham bam thank you ma'am" experience does not fulfill them and they seek more from the hobby. Even the most detached hobbiests seem to create ATFs which is completely human despite their best efforts to have "just sex"

to develop a connection or have a desire to be with someone who rocks your world. As long it's not to the point of stocking an uninterested party. If you have much to lose or are in it to just bang as much strange as you can, simply don't repete with anyone you wont have to worry about lack of ambiguity in the nature of the relationship.

The fact is I am no more interested in the potential drama & stresses that often accompany conventional relationships than the gent that comes to see me. I've been single by choice for more than a decade & have no intentions of changing that any time soon. That's not to say I don't genuinely care for, admire & even crush on any of my client. The reality is I firmly believe I DO as a direct result of the boundaries set within the hobby that allow me to freely do so. Knowing there are no expectations beyond lovers for the moment makes a gent that much more alluring to me.

I'll add (since there is a rather cold undertone to this attitude) that I am a GFE provider by choice as well. I chose to be because I care deeply about people & take great pleasure in providing pleasure & solace for others when they need someone to do so. My sessions are not "booty calls." I don't even care for the sound of the word. It just feels demeaning & disrespectful to me. I have no room for that in my life.

In a nut shell. The hobby has me spoiled. I have enveloped many meaningful relationships & again I reiterate the boundaries set within the hobby is what I believe has made that possible.


-- Modified on 8/18/2013 11:59:19 PM

hat would an existentialist say?  

 
I know what I say!  I say that there is not a single moment in my life I want to be absent from the touch and awareness of my own incredible heartbeat and when I am in the presence of a new man, or woman or flower or animal... a breathing moment, that I don't want to be absent from love, intrigue, curiosity, awe... that I want to be fully alive using all and I mean all of my senses and humanity.  

It's a shame that we only use about 10% of our brain capacity at any given time.  This is terrible, and as a culture we're into such a sexual repression dance it is pathetic... we don't use our minds much and we don't use our bodies to potentials either!  

So, for me, I want it all!   I don't want you!  I want it all!  It goes back to who am I?  Who are you?  Most all of this is a mystery and for me to want you for a booty call seems rather limiting... because when it comes down to it I want it all!  All of the time.  I want to constantly learn and discover new sexy, I am learning new sexy, teaching new sexy, finding new sexy... I don't want this to end in my life ever.  

You are all a mystery to me and a beautiful being of purpose of being on this planet for a reason by evidence of your heartbeat and pulse and glint in your eye and smile.  These universal and yet individual signatures of "Life" with the capital L.

I want to give back to life a gratitude for being alive and invite it to participate in the pleasure of my tongue touching this incredible skin with a gorgeous pulse underneath it.  

Ambiguous?  This is just pure play, fun and who says it is or isn't true love?  What are we?  We're made of incredible stuff and it is time to celebrate by finding pleasure for all it's worth and getting it and giving it and screw society and it's sick schizophrenia around the body.  

Walt Whitman was my first sexual and sensual teacher, can you tell?  

I am with him, and his poetry was sewn in to the fiber of my body as a child... Here's a little taste and in it he is not denying the incredible moment of just being.  I don't want to want after you, I don't want to want after anybody as it would be denial of how incredible something is right now.   Either we're here together now or still infused with our last great kiss.  

 

Song of Myself
By Walt Whitman
1
I celebrate myself, and sing myself,
And what I assume you shall assume,
For every atom belonging to me as good belongs to you.

I loafe and invite my soul,
I lean and loafe at my ease observing a spear of summer grass.

My tongue, every atom of my blood, form’d from this soil, this air,
Born here of parents born here from parents the same, and their parents the same,
I, now thirty-seven years old in perfect health begin,
Hoping to cease not till death.

Creeds and schools in abeyance,
Retiring back a while sufficed at what they are, but never forgotten,
I harbor for good or bad, I permit to speak at every hazard,
Nature without check with original energy

Happiness, not in another place but this place...not for another hour, but this hour.”  
Made me think of someone

every time I plan to respond then see you responded already ... I of course read yours and then there is nothing more to say than what you have said ... often you seem to say what I'm thinking and more with such passion  

thank you

When a provider tells me she "loves" me, or thinks, "I'd really love to see ClientX today", it's not crossing the boundaries of provider/client relationships.  I know what "I love you" means, in this context.  It's not, "I want to marry you" or "I want to be your girlfriend".  It means, for example, "I love that we have a relationship of mutual consideration, respect, and trust so that I feel completely safe when I'm with you.  I love that we enjoy each other's company and enjoy pleasuring each other."

So, philosophies such as Élan's, and similar philosophies of a few other ladies I know, can exist within the boundaries of the hobby.  It's the women with that type of philosophy that I seek.  And I consider myself one very lucky guy to have found more than one provider with such a philosophy.

It IS a wonderful world of pleasure, isn't it?? And it is ours to enjoy. We are fortunate beyond words. I loved reading your post...thank you.

Peace,

Astrid

Give Me Your Dirty Love!!

 
Give me  
Your dirty love  
Like you might surrender  
To some dragon in your dreams  
Give me  
Your dirty love  
Like a pink donation  
To the dragon in your dreams  

I don't need your sweet devotion  
I don't want your cheap emotion  
Just whip me up some dragon lotion  
For your dirty love  

Give me  
Your dirty love  
Like some tacky little pamphlet  
In your daddy's bottom drawer  
Give me  
Your dirty love  
I don't believe you have ever seen  
That book before  

I don't need no consolation  
I don't want your reservation  
I only got one destination  
An' that's your dirty love  

Give me  
Your dirty love  
Just like your mama  
Make her fuzzy poodle do  
Give me  
Your dirty love  
The way your mama  
Make that nasty poodle chew  

I'll ignore your cheap aroma  
And your little-bo-peep diploma  
I'll just put you in a coma  
With some dirty love  

THE POODLE BITES!  
(Come on, Frenchie)
THE POODLE CHEWS IT!  
(Snap it!)  
THE POODLE BITES!  
(Come on, Frenchie)  
THE POODLE CHEWS IT!  
(Snap it!

END OF MESSAGE

I want to meet you.

charmant !

you are such a treat.  when I read your messages I can still hear your voice.

You can have some amazing affairs and relationships with the people you meet doing this.    But you must remember where the boundaries are; breaking them is where so many of us get into trouble and/or cause trouble.