From this business after dealing with a jerk off who tried to force bbbj on me then threw a fit like a fucking child grabbed me and i had to taser him and hit him with a lamp. I've only seen 4 guys this was my first ''real'' client and was enough for me to back out of this business for a good time. I appreciate the gentlemen and providers that have taken time to message me advice.
I hope you can get through your anger, pain and fear that you must be experiencing.
Hopefully you have let the other ladies know who this is.
Good luck in your future, whatever you decide to do.
First, let me say I am sorry this happened to you and glad you are ok..And it is good you brought this situation to the board.
How did you meet him? Did he have references? Was he on TER?
Hopefully other providers can get the details of who this pig might be- again, what do you know about him?
Do you have a work email that people can use to contact you. It's ok I believe. to give your "work" email, as some of the gals you can help are not VIP
When the woman says "Stop" or "No", it means STOP. It doesn't matter what screening process was used or what's in the guy's head as to what the woman SHOULD do with him.
Thorough screening is of course important, but it's no guarantee that abuse of providers won't happen... whether physical abuse or other types of abuse. That is clear from recent history. A guy can be the perfect gentleman with other providers, be referred by those providers to other providers, then one day... wham.
Abuse of providers and all women won't stop until guys get it through their thick heads that NO ABUSE OF ANY WOMAN IS ACCEPTABLE. EVER.
Any man who doesn't think he can avoid abusing a provider should quit the hobby. NOW.
And if he won't do it for the welfare of the ladies, then he should do it for himself. He could get into a world of hurt should he abuse a provider. At the very least, he could be outed to the provider community and find it very difficult to see any provider (except maybe at an AMP) in the future. But beyond that, some providers know MA/self defense and are quite capable of defending themselves, with no mind as to what damage they might inflict on the abuser in order to protect themselves. Some have weapons like tasers. I know some who keep pistols in their incalls and aren't afraid to use them to protect themselves if necessary. And, I know some providers who, if you abuse them in ANY way, shape or form, have good friends who you do NOT want to meet. Then there's always the possibility the provider will report the abuse to LE, despite the legal risk to themselves.
So, guys, this is NOT on the providers, wrt screening or whatever. They need to screen and protect themselves as best they can, yes. But stopping this kind of abuse is on US. And if the guys can't all act like real men, i.e. like gentlemen, with these ladies who open themselves up to us and trust us, more women like Mariah will suffer, and everyone in the hobby will suffer with her.
After reading knotsaway's post and a thread a few down the page, 'So sad, this one strikes again', do we all now need to arm ourselves just to have a little fun? I find Knotsaway's post somewhat disturbing and irresponsible.
Do I need to worry that there may be a gun or taser under the pillow? Which providers have the "good friends" that I wouldn't want to meet? I know knots.. said 'if you abused them in ANY way' but still do we really want to get close to a situation like that? I know I don't!
I'm sure the rebuttal will be something like 'if you do nothing wrong you don't have to worry'. So there should be nothing wrong with clients bringing weapons either, right?
If you truly are afraid of being abused by a provider, you probably don't want to continue on in the hobby. I have no such concerns, so I have no need to bring any weapon with me to see a provider.
I am sorry that you found my post "disturbing and irresponsible." I find attacks on women to be VERY disturbing and irresponsible. If you ever had a woman close to you be abused, and saw its effects, as I have, you might feel differently. I think a provider--indeed any woman--should take whatever steps are necessary to protect herself from the lowlifes who think nothing of abusing a woman. If that means learning self defense, or learning how to use a weapon and having it nearby just in case--so be it.
And, yes... if you act like a gentleman, you have absolutely nothing to worry about from those good friends that some providers have. I feel better knowing they have such friends.
IIRC, having a weapon on your person during another ilicit act can increase the level of the offense. (Misdemeanor->felony? I can't remember for sure. Somebody with more legal mojo than I should weigh in.)
-- Modified on 10/4/2013 10:44:15 AM
Most of what you say I agree with knotsaway. I just don't think the girls need you to tell everyone here that they are arming themselves or have bad ass friends. What about the guy below that had a knife pulled on him? Do you think he now thinks he needs to be armed?
I'm sorry that Mariah had this happen to her and I should have said that in my first post. I'm also sure you, knotsaway, mean well. I just think you went too far in your unneeded advice. I also figured you have had someone close to you abused and I'm very sorry about that!
I also mean well and I don't think LE needs to see anyone spout off on TER about tasers, guns, and bad-ass friends. This hobby has enough to worry about already!
I am sorry that you found my post "disturbing and irresponsible." I find attacks on women to be VERY disturbing and irresponsible. If you ever had a woman close to you be abused, and saw its effects, as I have, you might feel differently. I think a provider--indeed any woman--should take whatever steps are necessary to protect herself from the lowlifes who think nothing of abusing a woman. If that means learning self defense, or learning how to use a weapon and having it nearby just in case--so be it.
And, yes... if you act like a gentleman, you have absolutely nothing to worry about from those good friends that some providers have. I feel better knowing they have such friends.
... about what advice I gave that you feel is "unneeded". I only gave one piece of advice... the rest of what I said was just stating things as they are... some of which has been discussed in other threads here recently.
I said re advice: Any man who doesn't think he can avoid abusing a provider should quit the hobby. NOW. And if he won't do it for the welfare of the ladies, then he should do it for himself.
That's all. And I explained what consequences could ensue for a guy who abuses a provider.
What part of my "advice" do you have a problem with, or do you feel is "unneeded"?
On the contrary, IMO. I think if abusers of women read this, maybe they will be reminded that women are protecting themselves and think TWICE about it.
I'd bet there are many other threads far more interesting to LE than this one.
Peace,
Astrid
I'm sorry that Mariah had this happen to her and I should have said that in my first post. I'm also sure you, knotsaway, mean well. I just think you went too far in your unneeded advice. I also figured you have had someone close to you abused and I'm very sorry about that!
I also mean well and I don't think LE needs to see anyone spout off on TER about tasers, guns, and bad-ass friends. This hobby has enough to worry about already!
I am sorry that you found my post "disturbing and irresponsible." I find attacks on women to be VERY disturbing and irresponsible. If you ever had a woman close to you be abused, and saw its effects, as I have, you might feel differently. I think a provider--indeed any woman--should take whatever steps are necessary to protect herself from the lowlifes who think nothing of abusing a woman. If that means learning self defense, or learning how to use a weapon and having it nearby just in case--so be it.
And, yes... if you act like a gentleman, you have absolutely nothing to worry about from those good friends that some providers have. I feel better knowing they have such friends.
Knots I LOVED your post. It all sounds like common sense to me. As far as clients being armed, I'd sure rather not have a new friend show up at my incall with a dangerous weapon. HowEVER if the client only has outcall to his place, then he should protect his home as he sees fit. I doubt a lady is going to show up and threaten a man in his own home. Good clients/respectful friends will never need to worry about what a lady may have to protect herself, or how many friends she may have in low places that they DON'T want to receive a visit from.
I find NOTHING disturbing about your post as its simple common sense to have a means to protect ourselves should we feel threatened in our homes, incall locations, etc. Women are built differently from men as nature made us. I think it is smart to be prepared.
I am so relieved that Mariah had a way to protect herself, and that we're not hearing about her on the news as a victim who couldn't. Another thing- you're right...this guy could have been a perfect gentleman with another lady but yet behaved badly with her. I will say though, that I doubt it. Any jerk that doesn't understand what the word "NO" means didn't deserve to be in the presence of a lovely girl like her, willing to give of herself. I can only imagine her fear and disillusion at this little vocation/hobby!
Thank you for your pro-provider post, and for your respect.
Ladies, be CAREFUL out there!
Peace- especially to you, Mariah.
Astrid
There should be no doubt that of course she screened him- this lady was just trying to start out and had posted of her screening methods and there was discussion here on TER that BP utilizers aren't "used" to her rigorous screening methods. I believe she was not yet even reviewed so advertising and finding quality clients was a challenge for her. This brings to mind the fact an unreviewed provider has no profile/menu to view and of course we know such things can't be discussed beforehand. So, as you said before, NO means NO at any time. In this case, no to BBBJ should have been a pretty simple explanation. Can you imagine throwing a temper tantrum as a grown man in the presence of a lady?? Wow.
I am sorry that you found my post "disturbing and irresponsible." I find attacks on women to be VERY disturbing and irresponsible. If you ever had a woman close to you be abused, and saw its effects, as I have, you might feel differently. I think a provider--indeed any woman--should take whatever steps are necessary to protect herself from the lowlifes who think nothing of abusing a woman. If that means learning self defense, or learning how to use a weapon and having it nearby just in case--so be it.
And, yes... if you act like a gentleman, you have absolutely nothing to worry about from those good friends that some providers have. I feel better knowing they have such friends.
I agree with 2late on this topic. It happens very often that weapons meant to defend oneself are used against the owner of that weapon. It would be very very easy for a man to overpower a female. Men ARE built differently. Sometimes, women have to use their intelligence to get out of a sticky situation whereas use of a weapon could act to escalate a situation
Exactly and this is where eye gouging and taking off like a bat outta hell comes in more useful than a weapon .
He had already attacked her. At that point you use whatever you have to defend yourself.
I'm sorry this happened to you, truly I am... I love that you taser'ed him though.
Ladies need to protect themselves, even with good screening you really don't know who's walking through the door or what's going on in his personal life that may cause him to act differently than he has with others. Glad you're ok