A fairly known provider I made the mistake of dating for the last several months. On the first encounter we had unprotected sex. not initially as a new client. I saw her a second time where she said she wanted to see me a couple more time and then just hook up for sex. Sounded great to me. Well after that we just got together and it was fun at first and then the lying started about how she felt . Then I found out she was using meth that's why she was lying to me about this or that because she needed to get high. I kept seeing her not thinking right and even picking up the habit myself. Supposedly we were into each other and everyone else  was just clients. She also need money she said she had and of was a lie and still waiting to get paid. dumb dumb I know I was stupid. She has s crisis regularly to guilt people into giving her money.  My question is now her habit is into shots and really think she is dangerous to the hobby. I recently found out she has been seeing other people and practicing unsafe sex with them. I am going to get tested this week myself. One of her friends  a kid half her age just got pulled over and busted recently and is looking at 2 felony counts. I have let her use my car to do who knows what with because her habit has really grown. I am very lucky she hasn't been pulled over in my car. I feel she should be outed. I am angry this is only a small portion of the story, there are other people that r dangerous around her, but that might just be more lies also. Just looking for some other peoples thoughts. I am not looking to out her personally just as a provider

-- Modified on 2/16/2013 11:23:48 PM

Hope you get tested, knocked on wood.

You probably already are kicking yourself and it's no use in kicking someone when they're down, so good luck to you.

As for the matter of outing someone -- even with "perfect" use of a condom it's not going to protect you from STDs. If you unfortunately are "infected" then I would say at this point may be more inclined to out them, attributing to public safety.

I believe the question of revealing the provider's identity centers around how much of your personal information she has available to use in order to possibly retaliate against your act.

In any case, I would appreciate a clarification of your description of her as "a fairly known provider". Is she well-known to The Erotic Review crowd and/or listed on Preferred411, or is she a regular feature on a site such as backpage.com?

Note:  I really cannot remember The Erotic Review allowing the publication of provider identities in such matters. The best alternative is to answer private message inquiries from other members interested in her identity.

Best of Luck! on the testing process.

We all come here for the very reason to know the information you are concealing. You are now dangerous like her and should be exposed like her UNLESS you do not want to be her accomplice any longer.

You have a duty to us to tell what you know. She is just 1 and can damage many. To be a little extreme: she is Bin Laden and you are going to just sit there. How do you feel if i knew she was bad news and just let you get sucked in?

You only have one right choice. The other makes you just like her.

** Strong opinion, but this situation goes to the very essence of this site. **

Your only question is HOW to out her. You cannot help her because she is an addict. Addicts are animals and lack conscience. Save yourself and us from further danger. It is not much of a question or choice.

How do we know that the OP is credible and not a scorned vindictive client?

And, if she offers BBFS to one, she likely offers to others.   I don't believe TER allows you to out her unsafe practices on the boards so you would need to back channel the info to those who inquire.

good luck to you,
Belinda

If you're not going to name the provider why even bother to post!

.......I  agree, this is the very first post by the OP who has zero credibility IMO.  His story is highly suspect, the first couple of sentences seem to contradict each other.  The "essence" of this site is to exchange information we all can use so we can have fun safely, but that information must be from a reliable and credible source or it is useless and can be problematic as to the reputations of those "outed".
One other note, jchan113 said that addicts are "animals" and while I agree that addicts present many different challenges in relationships (I know from personal experience dealing with an addict) they are still human beings and many do respond to assistance and love from others.  Comparing an addict to the terrorist Bin Laden, now THAT is extreme, even for this board.

Since you asked for thoughts, I will share a few, but you probably already know these yourself.

You knew her "occupation" when you engaged in unprotected sexual activity.  Did you really think you were the "only" one? That was dumb.  I hope for both your sakes that tests are negative and that this will only be the scare of a lifetime.  But since you had unsafe sex, you, too, are now just as hazardous as she.  I hope for everyone's sake YOU refrain from the hobby and activities you once enjoyed.  Perhaps she did use you, but it was all with your consent.  You could have said no at anytime and walked away.  Seems to me you were as hooked on the sex and thrill of it as she is to drugs.  Your sex addicition and co-dependency issues need to be dealt with or your life will soon be as ruined as hers is.  You need to complete your medical tests (any any treatments), and you really should consider seeking some professional help for yor own addictions since you cannot walk away.  If not, your life will be destroyed before you know it.

By the way.... forgetting TER and backpage (or wherever you found this provider), public health laws will allow you to "out" her in a privagte way if your tests are positive.  Though the rest of us won't know those details, you will be able to spare others from this problem.

This reminds me a bit of a saying when I was in the Marine Corps:  When runnning our countless miles and singing in cadence, we would sing, "This is my rifle, this is my gun.  This one's for killing, and this one's for fun."  Well, you have 2 heads.  One is for thinking and one is for fun.  You need to know when to use your thinking head and when to use your fun head.

Finally, if you are still in contact with this person, you should urge her to seek help, too.

Best of luck!

If you are for real, you should man up and drop the alias.  You should, at the least, notify the providers that you've seen at the same time you've seen this one -- not everyone follows TER; you should get yourself tested and cured; and you should make the identity of the provider available through back channels (PMs, etc).  

Either get her some help or cut it off with her.  This is a public health and safety issue now.

This is a serious matter for sure, but the suggestion to drop the alias make me chuckle.  I'm sure your drivers license lists your name as pollenbroker just as mine lists 69andsunny.  I doubt there is a real name used here, so it wouldn't matter (and you wouldn't even know) if someone gave you a real name.  And would you believe it?  That's the problem with playing with fire.... sometimes someone gets burned.  It's an enjoyable and thrilling hobby (or occupation) we share, but everyone knows the risks.  I try to minimize mine by being a massage-only guy, but there are even some inherent risks there, too.

I am not sure if TER would allow such a post to stay up but it would certainly cause an uproar.  It would be a he said, she said scenario.  Your handle has not been seen before.  And you want to start your posting career with this?  Even if you are being completely truthful, the odds are that few will believe you.  One's credibility here depends on one's history and you have none.  But we have seen handles show up for the sole purpose of trying to smear someone.  If you are being truthful, you may feel angry about what you have heard here but your anger is pointless.  We don't know you.

The poster appears to be using an alias apart from his TER handle

....Pollenbroker was correct.  There is a difference between an "alias" and a "handle" here at TER.  Your handle is in place of your real name, and most of us get "known" here by our handle if we post reviews and participate on the various boards.  Example: I have reviews posted under my handle, those ladies know I am reliable and safe to see.  I have a posting history on this board.  If you use the search function you can find all my posts by author (my handle).   In my case there are hundreds of posts (ok, ok, some say too many.... lol)  Anyway, other TER members can know from my reviews and posting history quite a bit about my philosophy of P4P, even though no one knows my real identity.  I am a "known quantity" here at TER.  When one posts using an "alias", particularity if there is no posting history using that alias, how would anyone know if the alias poster has credibility?   Also, at times alias posters simply want to stir up lots of controversy, then they are known as trolls......another discussion.

One other issue, you post that you try and minimize risks by seeing massage providers.  FWIW,  you can minimize the risk in seeing a multitude of gorgeous, erotic FS providers by doing some research here at TER.  If you don't have it, get VIP and start on that “must see” list.  We men in MN are fortunate to have some of the hottest most erotic women on the planet here and if you do your research and stick to well reviewed ladies, you will have fun and minimize ALL of the risks.

If I out her, I will out myself, Anyone that has seen her recently will have notice the band aides covering.

Did you read what you said, you followed of your own free will down this garden path, you let her use your car WHY ? You now think to blame her for your own mistakes, she saw a chump and ran with it and you are now angry and I don't even think you are angry for any other reason but that she dropped you like a hot potatoe once your usefulness was used up.
Lots of girls do this in all areas of the sex trade.
You are responsible for your own actions.
Unprotected Sex, lots of Men push for this and sometimes receive it.
Grow some Balls will You.

Do you really think I don't know what was meant? Do you think I don't know the difference?  I, too, am well known.  Big deal.  So a provider tests positive (or a client), and the question is: Whom have you have sexual contact with....  I'm sure mnjohnny is going to mean a lot.  Go ahead and beat your chest that you are known on TER.

And to your other comment: I have VIP status. Still see lots of mixed reviews.

....this from a poster with all of 4 posts on this board, all in the last two days?   I was trying to be helpful since you appeared to be a newb, I was not beating my chest at all.  You are not "well known" HERE, that was my point, but I do see now that you are an asshat.  One other small issue, my advice to get VIP always goes out to newbs and I did look at your 2 reviews before responding originally and I stand by my comments that if you saw well reviewed, higher quality providers, your risks ARE minimized.

Johnnyboy do you REALLY think one has to have numerous TER posts to be known?  I have better things to do with my time.  The ladies know who I am.  I looked at your posts, and I can tell you I have a hell of a lot more in my list than you do... but big deal.  Who cares.  That doesn't define who I am.  I don't need to name call as you did.  Big man who is "known" on TER.  Wow!  That's something to write home about.  I'm sure that will get you a cup of McDonald's coffee ...that and a dollar.

Regardless of how well you are known to the ladies by whatever means you are known, for discussion purposes on this board all most of us have to go on is your review and posting history.  In this case, that is very little.  You could have vast experience with escorts stretching back decades but it is hard for the rest of us to know that when all we know of you so far is 2 reviews and a handful of posts.

Planbmn:  If what you say is true (and I'm beginning to doubt it), then stop the histrionics and do at least one constructive, positive, thing...like let providers you've seen know the problem or out the provider in question thru back channels.  Talk about band-aids doesn't help the rest of the community.  If you choose to present a problem of this gravity to the community, then you've got a duty to handle it responsibly.

This one, while shorter, isn't any better.  Give us one reason why we shouldn't decide you are trouble maker and ignore you.

I vote for ignoring him.
Every Gentleman in this hobby has at one time fallen hard for a provider some end well others don't, but if I was a guy I would never let a girl use my car, I mean really what kind of idiot are you.
You say she has a habit but it sounds like you joined her in said habit and you accuse her of trouble, you probably were dumb enough to drive and find whatever habit you both were into.
You want to out her, well damn I were still in this hobby I damn sure would want to know who your creepy ass is.
Sorry for the rant, but you just make me ill.

well, hobbiest and providers rule no.1 no getting involved personally it's a business not love connection, on the rare occasion it happens it's all good but most people know not to cross the line.

so the question is weather to out her or not, if ur willing to come out and say who you are and offer more personal info to prove it's true, I say keep it on some back channel and answer people's inquiry, that way you protect urself and her from the public and let people make the decision for themselves.

we're all adults here, we all know the risk of our actions, live with your decision. we all have two choices yes or no, can't be mad at anyone when you made the decision