Notice to people who visit my home.
  1. the dog lives here...you don't.

  2. if you don't want dog hair on your clothes, stay off the furniture.

3. yes, he has some disgusting habits. So do I and so do you. What's your point?

 4. OF COURSE he smells like a dog.

5. it's his nature to try to sniff your crotch. Please feel free to  sniff his.