I get your rational but past relationships and sexual partners do come up in long term relationships. So either you ll probably having to lie to them or tell the truth. Would you want to know her sexual history?
I agree cheating is cheating, some wives don't care, some turn a blind eye, some would rather someone else give the blow jobs but what ever the case judging someone solely because they are married can't fit all situations. Hell staying together for the children might be best even though the marriage was over years before...
I was asking if you are Honest with any girlfriends about sleeping with escorts in the past....
You place your morality on married men not being honest but it's a bit hypocritical if you aren't honest with the civie women you date.
Also when you meet and date a civie girl do you stop using escorts until that relationship has run its course?
How do those of you with significant others get the cash needed without raising suspicion? In my case I have a lot of leeway making credit card purchases as I buy a lot of goods for home and work, but cash withdrawals are always seen by the S.O.
Cash advances are worse as they would be noticed, and make no sense when I could go to an ATM. I have mandatory direct deposit at work which makes it tougher.
Any good creative ways of funding this thing of ours?
H.C
Accounts. Easier to balance and we each pay parts of our monthly bills.
With your situation could you open a personal account maybe even in a different bank and have paperless statements, just direct deposit a portion or set amount each pay period. I can do it with my direct deposit at work.
Cash advances are worse as they would be noticed, and make no sense when I could go to an ATM. I have mandatory direct deposit at work which makes it tougher.
Any good creative ways of funding this thing of ours?
H.C.
If you say bank at well Fargo with your joint account, open your own personal account at say Bank of America with paperless statements. Set up direct deposit to deposit 75.00 a week or whatever you would like into it. Explain the change in your wells account by saying you either had a health insurance premium increase or you adjusted your tax with holdings, 401k deposit....
Some might accept it; others may want to see the pay statement or be displeased the guy made the change without consulting her.
Cash advances are worse as they would be noticed, and make no sense when I could go to an ATM. I have mandatory direct deposit at work which makes it tougher.
Any good creative ways of funding this thing of ours?
H.C.
I travel a lot on expense accounts where I pay for the expenses and then submit an expense report for reimbursement. The reimbursement check arrives several weeks after I've spent the money, and, when I cash them, I always hold out a C-note or two. Sometimes, I simply cash the entire thing. My wife doesn't check things that closely, but she WOULD notice a lot of cash withdrawals. So, my method just described works for me.
Good luck!
ttp://www.amazon.com/Hide-Money-Other-Time-Honored-Build/dp/0684841878
After my last divorce I read this book and realized at least one method was likely used by her to hide money. She insisted on paying the American Express bill each month from our joint checking so I never paid it any attention. After the divorce I got an analysis of my AMEX account to see where the money was spent. An average of $5,000/yr listed as children's clothing. Only her two children could have been the recipients of this expense and I know there was nowhere near that amount spent on their clothing. I presume she would charge clothing on the account and return some of it for a cash refund. This was many years ago when it was common to get cash refunds for charged goods. Maybe you can find some helpful hints in this book.
Go to Barnes& Noble. The amazon recently browesd items might not look too friendly.
http://www.amazon.com/Hide-Money-Other-Time-Honored-Build/dp/0684841878
After my last divorce I read this book and realized at least one method was likely used by her to hide money. She insisted on paying the American Express bill each month from our joint checking so I never paid it any attention. After the divorce I got an analysis of my AMEX account to see where the money was spent. An average of $5,000/yr listed as children's clothing. Only her two children could have been the recipients of this expense and I know there was nowhere near that amount spent on their clothing. I presume she would charge clothing on the account and return some of it for a cash refund. This was many years ago when it was common to get cash refunds for charged goods. Maybe you can find some helpful hints in this book.
I have the same issues as the OP. I have money...I just have a really hard time getting at it without arousing suspicion. What I do is use my ATM when I get gas or go to places like Home Depot and I use the option to get cash back. So I get $20 cash every time and I don't let the wife see the receipts for what I purchased.
I also have been selling stuff I don't need on craigslist.
I do have my own credit card as well and she doesn't see the bill for that. So I can do a cash advance and then pay it back using our funds from our joint account.
I'm also planning on doing some side work and then pocketing the cash.
You can also start a business and don't let your wife see the books.
Anyone else have suggestions, ideas? Keep 'em coming!
Cash advances are worse as they would be noticed, and make no sense when I could go to an ATM. I have mandatory direct deposit at work which makes it tougher.
Any good creative ways of funding this thing of ours?
H.C.
I gave my spouse a separate brokerage account put a good chunk of our assets in it. If I die of a car accident, I do not want her unable to get cash anyway. She uses it for her expensive hobby. I use mine for mine. Good thing considering the size of the hobby bills
Honestly I hope she catches you.
All the escorts you've seen? I can't imagine many civie women would even date someone who has been with many escorts
Yes, when I find someone to serious with then I'm out of the hobby business.
I was asking if you are Honest with any girlfriends about sleeping with escorts in the past....
You place your morality on married men not being honest but it's a bit hypocritical if you aren't honest with the civie women you date.
Also when you meet and date a civie girl do you stop using escorts until that relationship has run its course?
No way in hell would i share my hobby experience with new person in my life. Can't even compare what I'm doing verse someone who's already married and then start to hobby. One is cheating and the other is your past, apples and oranges.
I was asking if you are Honest with any girlfriends about sleeping with escorts in the past....
You place your morality on married men not being honest but it's a bit hypocritical if you aren't honest with the civie women you date.
Also when you meet and date a civie girl do you stop using escorts until that relationship has run its course?
I get your rational but past relationships and sexual partners do come up in long term relationships. So either you ll probably having to lie to them or tell the truth. Would you want to know her sexual history?
I agree cheating is cheating, some wives don't care, some turn a blind eye, some would rather someone else give the blow jobs but what ever the case judging someone solely because they are married can't fit all situations. Hell staying together for the children might be best even though the marriage was over years before...
I was asking if you are Honest with any girlfriends about sleeping with escorts in the past....
You place your morality on married men not being honest but it's a bit hypocritical if you aren't honest with the civie women you date.
Also when you meet and date a civie girl do you stop using escorts until that relationship has run its course?
This has been my best way to hide my hobbying cash. The SO and I will go gambling from time to time. She thinks I'm the unluckiest guy on the planet because--as far as she knows--I almost always lose. The money I "lost" gambling usually goes into my hobby account. If I do happen to win, I'll pocket half of it and then split the remaining winnings with her. I had one big win that has funded this year's fun. I don't know what I'm going to do when that runs out.
It's still not the most lucrative way to hide cash, though. Casinos don't exist to give away money (although they sure want you to think so), so I still lose some of my hard-earned cash in the process.
Thanks for the tips.
A few thoughts:
The bank accounts with online statements would be easily detected during tax time as the would bee seen when she looks over the return and there is an extra account on the schedule.
The cash back option always seem to appear on the credit card statements, I tried that route
I really like the idea of buying something on a credit card and returning for cash, any leads of stores that allow this?
Another thought was to buy either a money order or gift card and try to redeem it for cash at a check cashing store
Selling things on Craig's list was a good one.
Keep them coming
Thank
Every $100 you spend in the hobby today, is $50 your SO would have gotten in the divorce had you not spent it. So your future Ex is actually picking up half the bill when you hobby!
If she can prove it, then you deserve it!
I have friends (not clients) who do the fake return retail store hustle. I am not endorsing it ... but it is out there, if you need to get some extra money.