Massage Parlors

I know what I would do...
DeClemente 48 Reviews 14871 reads
posted
1 / 25

This is regardless of whether or not you're engaged in any P4P at the moment it occurs, you may answer the question any way you like.

impposter 49 Reviews 484 reads
posted
2 / 25

... but I'd probably come close to having a heart attack.
.
I would LIKE to think that I'd be quick enough to come up with a decent excuse, depending on the situation.  
.
If a strip mall "SPA - MASSAGE" with giant signs and signals, I couldn't say, "Oh ... I thought this was the pizza place. I entered the wrong door." How about, "But I'm only here for a REAL massage!"
.
If it was an apartment in a residential building, I could maybe say that I knocked on the wrong door and that I am only there to pick up a FedEx package. Or my friend got robbed at this horrible place last week and I've come to get "street justice" for my friend.  
.
If it was converted space in a commercial building (where all the office doors look the same), I just came to the wrong door. I was looking for the insurance company on the third floor but I miscounted the floors (ground-1-2-3 instead of 1-2-3-4). What's that? There is no insurance company on the third floor? I guess I'm in the wrong building! And so on.
.
But in reality, they'd probably be hauling me away in an ambulance.

Posted By: DeClemente

This is regardless of whether or not you're engaged in any P4P at the moment it occurs, you may answer the question any way you like.

DeClemente 48 Reviews 505 reads
posted
3 / 25

Posted By: impposter
Re: Too many possible scenarios ...
... but I'd probably come close to having a heart attack.  
 
LOL, that makes sense! Thanks for answering.

Steve_Trevor 487 reads
posted
4 / 25

that I’m naked whenever I’m getting a massage.  Nothing illegal about that.

 
Then consider that massage places typically have little sound insulation. So I and the masseuse will hear the commotion when a raid begins. And it takes all of a second or two to grab the towel that’s on or near the table and throw it over my midsection.  If necessary I can flip over so I’m face down.

 
I have no idea what was going on elsewhere in the building. I was there only for a massage. I have a letter from my chiropractor (an M.D.) prescribing regular massage sessions, if the police would like to see it.  

mrfisher 111 Reviews 483 reads
posted
5 / 25

And after that, I'd ask what this is all about.

 
What I wouldn't do is answer any questions beyond name, rank, and serial number.

 
Then I'd call my lawyer.

lopaw 29 Reviews 485 reads
posted
6 / 25

...but then I'd remember that they'd probably see me as a dolphin caught in the net by mistake and let me go. After all, women don't get happy endings at spas of course! :D :D :D

DeClemente 48 Reviews 479 reads
posted
7 / 25

Posted By: lopaw
Re: I'm sure at first I'd freak out...

After all, women don't get happy endings at spas of course! :D :D :D
Of course not, WINK, WINK.
LOL!  
:D :D :D

luvmtiter 111 Reviews 479 reads
posted
8 / 25

I would do nothing (I would be nervous tho...) Don't say anything, not a word! They cannot prove intent, until one starts running thier mouth.

CaptainRenault 494 reads
posted
9 / 25

And make sure the girl backs you up.  If you are a regular, tell the cops that you get great massages there all the time.  Of course, if there are used condoms strewn about, you are fucked.  Or, you were fucked, so you are fucked.

DeClemente 48 Reviews 499 reads
posted
10 / 25

Posted By: CaptainRenault
Re: Tell them you are getting a massage, NOTHING more than a massage…
And make sure the girl backs you up.  If you are a regular, tell the cops that you get great massages there all the time.  Of course, if there are used condoms strewn about, you are fucked.  Or, you were fucked, so you are fucked.
Tthanks, CaptainRenault.

-- Modified on 11/1/2021 1:05:39 AM

cantdance 80 Reviews 482 reads
posted
11 / 25

google stfu pot brothers on what to say.  or to be clearer to say nothing

team_rocket_qwerty 35 Reviews 456 reads
posted
12 / 25

And ask the officer what seems to be the problem. Then I might plead the fifth.

doctor2002 19 Reviews 447 reads
posted
13 / 25

I’d finish myself off.

victor3866 13 Reviews 392 reads
posted
14 / 25

Happened to me.  Was in the middle of the deed.  Knock on the door, announced they were the police.  Girl started freaking out, asked me to swallow the condom (I didn't of course).  Stalled and started getting dressed, socks on first with condom in it, shorts and shirt while she got dressed and opened the door.  They pulled her out and told me to get dressed.  I didn't say a word, they checked my ID and told me to leave.  I haven't been back to that place, but didn't stop going.

DeClemente 48 Reviews 389 reads
posted
15 / 25

Posted By: victor3866
Re: I know what I would do...
Happened to me.  Was in the middle of the deed.  Knock on the door, announced they were the police.  Girl started freaking out, asked me to swallow the condom (I didn't of course).  Stalled and started getting dressed, socks on first with condom in it, shorts and shirt while she got dressed and opened the door.  They pulled her out and told me to get dressed.  I didn't say a word, they checked my ID and told me to leave.  I haven't been back to that place, but didn't stop going.
Thanks
How long ago was it?

Max101 8 Reviews 405 reads
posted
16 / 25

I think the first point is to not be intimidated by the cops.  They live & die by intimidating innocent people into "consenting" to searches and otherwise surrendering their 1st, 4th and 5th Amendment rights.  

- Don't bring ANY ID into the AMP.  Bring in your car key (no key fob with your house keys) and just enough cash to consummate your relationship.
- If a cop harasses you, ask them if you are free to go.  If they say "No", ask them why you are being detained and what crime they have reasonable suspicion of committing.
- As you leave, don't walk directly to your car.  Go wherever you have to go until things calm down.  If they see you getting into your car, they can invent a reason to pull you over for a traffic stop.

To minimize your chances of getting caught in a raid, I'd suggest:
- Going outside of normal business hours.  Most municipalities aren't willing to pay overtime to cos to bust massage parlors.  The non-LE bureaucracies who go after MPs such as licensing or health departments for sure won't pay a penny of overtime.
- Go when the weather is bad.
- Avoid the month or so before election day.

herbtcat 6 Reviews 382 reads
posted
17 / 25

Disclaimer: I am not a lawyer.  This is not legal advice. Consult your lawyer before you expose yourself (pun intended) to this situation.  

 
Don't try to talk your way out of arrest - you cannot.  A police officer can arrest you for any reason or no reason at all. They do not need to have evidence, proof, corroboration or anything.  They can arrest you for farting, for blinking, for existing, or just because they are bored.  

 
But being arrested DOES not mean you will be charged, and if charged, it does not mean you will be convicted.  

 
So play the long game and SAY NOTHING. If required by your state/municipal laws, present your ID. Then shut up. Tell the officer you will not answer any questions without a lawyer present.  NO QUESTIONS! The cop will tell you (lie to you) many things to make you think it's ok to answer even an innocent question. It is never a good idea! "Why are you here?" "When did you get here?" "Who knows where you are?" EVERY answer you give, other than silence, will be used in some way to implicate you in something.  It's almost impossible to give an answer that won't be used to show you have lied in some way.  If you misstate a fact (eg: say "I got here at 4:00 pm" and it was actually 3:54 pm, you can now be shown to be dishonest and trying to cover up something.) Seems petty, and it is. But an experienced and a prosecutor can use just that little thing to make you look guilty of something in front of a jury or judge.  

 
You may think you never lie: But sorry, not true. Every time you estimate, guess, approximate, etc. you can be made out to be lying.  

 
You are not smarter than the cop.  
You are not more experienced in interrogations than the cop.
The cop has been trained by experts to get you to talk and to ask you questions that will hurt you.

 
Get used to the idea that you may go to jail.  Have your attorney on speed dial for when you are allowed to call.  

 
No matter what the cop says, it is a trap.  
No matter what you tell the cop, it will be used to indicate your guilt of something. It may not even be related to massage service.  

 
The cops and prosecutor bear the burden of proving you guilty. Do not help them. Stay silent. Demand a lawyer. And put your pants on as soon as possible.  

 
Life is good

 
The Cat

PS: I have added a link to a YouTube video, where a COP tells you why you should never talk to the police. Watch it now, then thank me later.

TheOldMuffDiver 240 reads
posted
18 / 25

Check for video cams!

PhillyDwag 24 Reviews 130 reads
posted
19 / 25

Rule #1, #2 and #3 Keep your mouth shut.  The more you talk the worse it gets for you.  But don't be an A-hole to them because if you piss them off, it isn't worth it.  

Unless you own an NFL team or are a local politician, there really is nothing to worry about.   Understand the massage lady will forget how to speak any English.   The manager isn't saying anything.  Your entire fate is in your own hands.  If you're a business owner in town, travel 30+ minutes and find another AMP that isn't in your town.   Even then they really don't have any thing to get you on, unless you want to do their job for them.  

I was in the room when I heard a commotion outside.  The manager knocked on the door and said get dressed and don't say anything.  I went down to the lobby area and there were 3 LEO's there who told me and another guy to just stand there.  He asked me for my ID, I gave it to him.   Not my thing, but don't take drugs into these places to party.  

The cop told me my life was over.   My wife and kids were going to leave me, (not married).   Most likely I was going to get fired from my job.  It sounded scary but I knew they had zero evidence of anything besides me being in a building.  The more friendly LEO, started with the why are you here?  What were you doing here?  He started with why take the risk of a disease?  I didn't answer anything directly but still tried to be respectful and not a prick.  I kind of let them know without saying anything, they were not going to get me to incriminate myself.  

Eventually they grew tired of trying to scare me and get me to confess.  So along with a stern warning of I never want to see you again, told me to go and never come back.  I just left.  I still think they were bored and just popped in to roust the place.  I think they were playing a game to see if they could get me and the other guy who was freaked out, to cry.   The other guy followed my lead and also kept his mouth shut.  

What I did eventually say over and over was, "I am hear for a rub down" NOT "I got a rubdown".  Of course they said, "No you're not, I know what you're here for." along with threats that my life was over.  I would just shrug my shoulders, like I didn't know what he was talking about?   I stayed, on the outside very calm.  I think I said something like "I don't know what you're talking about" along with a look like, do you think I am that frigging stupid to confess to something like that?  

If they are targeting the business, to shut it down, they will use license violations. If they are targeting, what is happening in there, they will always send in undercover LEO's to get a recording of Act X for Dollar amount $Z being offered, before any physical acts happen.  Electrical and plumbing issues also are a favorite target of theirs.  Or they are looking for green cards or other documents from the gals.  

Also remember cops can lie to you.  So their threats of you're going to jail and your wife will have to bail you out, are empty unless you confess you were just committing a crime.  Whatever happens in the room is between you and the gal.   No one knows exactly what happened.  They have no way of proving an actual rubdown happened.  

I did go back to this place a week later and they said, the kitchen mom was unloading the groceries from the deliver car and a LEO cruiser rolled up to the intersection.  They sort of ignored the LEO and left the front door open.  The LEO got his kickers twisted up that they didn't respect him, by leaving the door open, so he came in to break balls.  

Helj 24 Reviews 106 reads
posted
20 / 25

Appreciate all this good feedback. Honestly this is my one fear, as I am married and support the entire family financially, so if my wife did find out - marriage and most of life as I know it would be toast, job probably done too as they annual background checks in my industry. Challenge is like many married for so long, don’t get any at home have a nice friendship … so I end up back here.  

You make this all sound fairly easy, but what are these stings I read about where so many people get busted? If they can’t incriminate you and you don’t incriminate yourself, how come so many people get busted in chunks? Undercover female agents? Police hiding and watching on cams?

mrfisher 111 Reviews 122 reads
posted
21 / 25

that is, the notoriety from being named in the local newspaper leading to loss of job and/or divorce. Compared to the fine, lawyer's fees, and court cost if found guilty, those pose much greater risks.

 
So, what can you do about it?    Not a lot, unfortunately.

 
But here's what will protect you:   The law of averages.  That same law that dictates you'll never win it big in a casino or the lottery also will protect you from most of life's harm.

 
That is to say, the number of people who do get caught compared to the number of people who partake of MP services is extremely low.   Life is full of taking risks.   You get in your car, go on a plane, go our on a golf course, eat at a restaurant, attend a movie even - they all can lead to your severe injury or death.   If we think about these things it would paralyze us and we'd never get our of bed.  (Which can also be dangerous to your health.)

 
In the end, you have to go with your gut feel on these things.   If your fear about attending an MP make the experience unpleasant or worse, then don't do it.   The whole idea of doing this is to have fun, not to be miserable.  

 
There is one thing you can do to improve your odds somewhat, and that is to keep your ears to the ground about law enforcement activities in your area.   If it is before election time (As it is now.) and some local police chief or pol is making noise about cleaning up the town, then better to lie low and wait for things to cool off.  So read your local paper and or watch your local news casts.   Have situational awareness.

CuriousGeorge1152 104 reads
posted
22 / 25

Is to go with an independent. Tryst has a category for massage as does Eros.  They could be locals or traveling indies.  Of course, they will be more expensive than AMPs...in the range of $300-$600 depending on the extras they provide.  But I've never heard of a police raid on indies like this.

PhillyDwag 24 Reviews 103 reads
posted
23 / 25

Read my full response from above.    

Exactly what evidence do they have?  Even if they find you balls deep with video of your creampie dripping out of her.   Do they have clear evidence of an exchange of S for $?  Maybe she is your GF?  Or she just really liked you?  Can they prove she wasn't you GF.  I have dated a massage worker before.  The reality is people have gotten legit massages at a spa before.  They have to gather evidence that a crime happened.  Don't do their job for them.  You have 4th, 5th and 6th amendment rights unless you surrender them, usually by talking.  

The biggest problem is getting nervous and talking to LE.  They can and will LIE to you.  They will scare you. They will act like they are your friend doing you a favor they are NOT your friend.  It is not a casual conservation.  DON'T TALK.  ZIP IT UP.   The only thing I said, was "I was going to get a rub down. (note future tense)".   Just because they are suspicious of something, doesn't make it a crime.  IF they say they know what I was doing in the room, ask yourself exactly how do they know that?  

If you get scared and if they tell you, "just tell what you were doing here and you can go home".  If you fold and tell them, "I was only going to get a HJ for $60".  You'll be in cuffs within a minute.  If you take their badgering for 10-15 minutes and keep quiet and stay respectful, you'll be going home a free man.  Knowing what I know, I would never going into a spa with a marked car outside or within site of the front door out of respect.  Don't act like a punk, LEO can make your life miserable if you provoke them.  

OjackieO 45 reads
posted
24 / 25

You can say anything you want, it won't matter & they don't care. I've had 3 clients this actually happened to, all were  very innocent you know.. It isn't Barney Fife going in alone. These are plans. It's how most get shut down. They go in, separate each person take their phones, keys, before you can blink. You are not free to leave until mission is complete. If your girl has a different story, you'll likely be held. Totally innocent people are there for 3 hours during investigation, bc everyone is investigated before anyone leaves. You don't get a chance to call & tell honey why you're not home. I've known them to put names in the paper, or mail letters to their homes if they were caught in a place where people went downtown, even if they didn't. I'd stay OUT of MPs periodtttt. No matter what you do, do it one on one. They put a Chief of popo front page  not far from me this past year.  They make people pay trying to scare everyone else away from doing this & to close  public businesses down. People have asked me why I never have another girl come in & work together. LOL. I trust ME. That's why.
Sweetrubs In Myrtle beach

Max101 8 Reviews 31 reads
posted
25 / 25

I've generally practiced some basic principals that I believe can help us minimize the chances of being caught in a raid.

Timing #1:  Cops don't like to raid places during rush hours because it's very difficult for them to roll into a place and park in the middle of a rush hour.  Since most places don't open early in the morning, plan your visit during afternoon rush hour.

Timing #2:  Cops like to cater to the local TV news channels, especially during an election year.  They will generally raid a place in the late morning in order to call out the media and give them time to prepare stories for the 6:00 news.  Rush hour comes into play again, because you now have to have enough parking for both cops and news trucks.

Timing #3:  Cops like to raid places during weekdays during normal work hours.  This is because they have the entire day staff at the police station to handle bookings and paperwork.  Also, judges get pretty annoyed when cops call them at 2:00 asking for an arraignment of massage parlor girls that they could have done during the day.

Weather:  Raids generally don't take place during bad weather, especially rain.  Cops don't like to get wet.  Plan your adult relations on days when it's raining or snowing.

Logistics:  Don't park your car right out in front.  Park away from the parlor.  NEVER take anything in except the amount of cash you plan to spend:  No wallet, no ID, no phone.  You almost can't avoid taking in car keys.  Take the second set that doesn't have house keys or supermarket loyalty cards.  

Of course, there are examples out there of exceptions.  But, it you pay attention to some or all of these exceptions, you'll be OK.  

Register Now!