That is a great list that I have always followed. One more thing is I always try to send an e-mail informing the provider that she will be receiving a reference check for me. A heads up is always good.

Not everyone accepts White List, even though they should. If you are a provider receiving a free VIP account and do not accept White List as part of your screening process, you should have the VIP status revoked. Just my take.

Hi ladies and gents. I'm not a full time hobbyist but I have my handful of escapades throughout the year.

Here is my dilemma. I feel bad about asking ladies for references.

Your thoughts, comments?

Thank you,
Mr Hecky

That's part of the trade. It keeps us all safe.

1.  always ask a lady if you can use her as a reference - some don't and some have specific ways they'd like to be contacted

2.  be sensitive not to have a lady's inbox or voicemail get blown up with reference checks - they do have their own business to run

3.  get Whitelisted ASAP so you don't have to rely so heavily on references

i got verified today in less than an hour, and i believed it was because two lovely ladies had whitelisted me...

I've always wondered how widely accepted the TER white list is. In my limited experience, very few ladies have agreed to accept that all by itself. They usually want to call or email a real person and get a specific response. Is the whitelist helpful at all or a waste of time?

I am whitelisted, by the way, by two wonderful young ladies and working on a third, so obviously I don't think it's a waste of time. But I am interested in hearing opinions on that.