If you are on the TER whitelist, then kudos, because that makes it super quick and easy!

I wish everyone felt the same way, then the world would be a perfect place...

I know how you feel. I really wish I could do all this with a fake name, for a variety of reasons. I totally understand why you all want to know who we really are, but it makes me very uncomfortable to give out my name, phone number, and work info. I once had a provider call my work to verify me and apparently the conversation was odd enough that the receptionist mentioned it to me later. I also had a girlfriend go through my browsing history and call some of the providers I had looked at and call them trying to figure out if I had seen them.

As a result I’ve become pretty paranoid and resigned myself to not seeing the high end providers, because they generally, understandably, do the most rigorous screening. But it seems that the second tier providers are a lot more likely to use fake photos and misrepresent themselves in their ads, so my experiences that past year or so have been generally pretty unsatisfying.

it never occurred to me that a reference from another provider might make that provider "jealous" of your seeing me.

but i first heard of that from a brand new (and great) lady whom i just had a wonderful date with.  we spoke about this very thing, getting screened and white lists, and she told me that sometimes when she calls a provider reference, they would accuse her of "stealing' her client (apparently, not my references, i guess i only hand with the classy ones lol!)

but it would seem to me that this should be a business first and an emotional committment 23rd or so.  if a guy wants a new experience i wouldn't expect a reference to put up a fuss.  unless she's so insecure in her own abilities to make me want to come back for more.

oh well, people are people i guess no matter the situation.

as to your question jazzy, there's always p411 and datecheck, tho i don't make use of them myself, having quite a few white list references personally.

ps love your pix jazzy!

You can contact the TER providers in question and do your due diligence that way.

Makes life so much easier for me and speeds up the process. P411 & Date check are great too. I love anything that speeds up the process.

Xoxo,

Natalie

Yeah it is a tough situation lol. I completely understand when men don't want to give their real life information, but its unfortunate that I would have to decline seeing what could have been a perfect gentleman.

While I'd love to accommodate anyone who was polite and took their time to contact me, it is just a risk I can't take. The way I feel is, if I meet someone and have no information but their ph#, what is to stop them from beating me to a bloody pulp or any other bad thing? I would have no way of recourse, and they have nothing to lose. At least I feel comfortable in knowing if someone has given me their information, they wouldn't want to fuck up their own life by fucking mine up.

In fact, I was joking with a hobbyist I had just met the other day about this. He said I might know the most about him over any provider, to which I said I had already forgotten most of the details anyway, it is just something I need to see once. Unfortunately this is not the case with all providers!

And as far as provider references.. Yes I have dealt with a lot of craziness. There are girls who don't answer, or literally have told me he isn't cool, then tried to see the client themselves. One time a girl asked specifically what my handle was here to look at my pics/ad I guess. I love to give references and even feel bad when I take a long time to get to my phone, because I know that sense of relief myself when someone texts me back "yeah he is cool".

I wish that I would have asked my many dates when I was addicted to this hobby for a whitelisting, but I did not.  Missed opportunity. And unfortunately all of my dates have since moved on to other adventures and no way of contacting them.  
P411 well I would rather spend the money on a date. Datechecker to invasive and I was a victim of ID theft so no.
So don't know.   Before the screening I would just tell them a bit about myself. I would start that I get a std check up every 3 months (still clean), Single, pacifist, and my field of work.
I only had one accident with a date in which she was going to kiss me and I was going to kiss her chest and she gave me a small gash on my forehead and I busted her lip.  She admitted it was accident and we both apologize and she wanted to go on, but I ended the date even though it was only 30 minutes into our 1 hour date. No I did not stiff her, but I did give her a tip and apologized to her again.  I couple of weeks later I saw her again and we had a great time.

I wish this hobby would be legalize that way all the bad people on both sides can be weeded out and we can have many more pleasurable experiences.
That way you will have the following for both:
STD
Criminal
and secured payment.
And since this is considered medical beneficial to your well bieng you would also get privacy.

Honestly if it was not for this hobby I might have committed suicide in my late 20's because I could not take the loneliness anymore, but here I am 12 years later enjoying life.