Means nothing without naming her.

...even an intimate item, does not seem to equal discussing sex for money.

Newbie girls are always very skittish.  I had two different girls that were really hyper paranoid.  I had this girl come over once and she had been busted a couple times by LE so she insisted that she allowed entire access to the house, check out the garage, etc.  I said sure.  I think she came her and scoped it out for half and hour before she texted me to let me know she was here.  Another time, this gal got to my location but was freaking out and said she couldn't come in because there were these "guys" sitting in a car.  Well I walked out there and down the block, there were four mexican gardners having lunch in the car because there is a fast food joint nearby.  Sheesh.  If newbie girls feel anything weird, they jump out of their seat.

only see 'well reviewed' providers. Granted, 'well' can mean lots of things, and every guy has his own standards. I venture to say, not many of us would say the '1or2 reviews and CV ad' formula is a good one.

In my newbie days, a provider is on the way to my hotel, she's a pro, I'm nervous as hell, making sure the room is perfect, music, wine, wine glasses, my breath is ok, every hair in place, my knob buffed, polished-n-ready to go, pacing the floor... oh shit, I forgot the condoms - I call her, we have a nice chat as she is driving and I mention that she needs to pick them up... HANG UP NO CALL NO SHOW  Lesson learned.

Yours is a bit different as it is just a clothing request - but a newbie can be spooked more easily and/or she thinks any 'question' is time to call it off.

Another approach - ASK - 'Can I make a clothing request?'

As  'bummer' experiences go, this is not so bad, could have been much worse.

I Find It Arousing When A Gentlemen Has A Request

My ultimate goal is to fulfill your fantasy and put a big ol' smile on your face.

Seriously, that seems like a harmless request.  Now, if you had asked for a suit of armor or a latex body suit...that's different.  "Not that there's anything wrong with that...."  RT Confused & Out

Another possibility.  It could be when you first set up the date, you were actually communicating with a booker.  When the actual date and confirmation were happening, you were now texting with the Provider and not the booker.  The Provider as written, got scared with your request.  Just another thought.

I pride myself on being respectful and I never thought I said anything that was the least bit offensive or would in any way jeopardize either of our fun or safety, but you just can't predict some people's reactions.

Like another poster said, my approach for first visits is to do nothing except show up and let her follow her script.  I actually dislike doing this, but if she's good enough, I'll go back and we'll have more fun the second time.

I can't figure out a lot of women in civilian life either, so I'm not too surprised when it happens with an escort.