Take my advice …

After a nine month relationship with a provider that was full of passion, warmth, romance, and lots of great sex…. a relationship that I spent tens of thousands of dollars on without thinking twice, I discovered this past week who this woman really was.  I had suspected, questioned, and looked away often, but in these past few days it has become so clear and obvious that it was simply no longer avoidable.  And while what follows may sound obvious to most, I am writing it just the same so you won’t make the same mistake I did …

It is often written, even joked about, that we as men need to avoid thinking with “the little head”.  I need to add to that, and say that we should also avoid thinking with the “heart” as well.  In other words, if you find yourself having feelings for a provider, or if she says she is having feelings for you (or both), don’t walk away, run.  

If after an encounter with a provider you get back in your car and find yourself sitting back in the seat asking yourself “what the hell just happened?”, and you find that the woman is on your mind all the time, and all you can think about is how great it is to simply be around her, drive away as fast as you can, and never look back.  

If you do not do this, if you run towards it and not away from it I assure you, it will not end well.  Even if you think you are in control, or if you think you can make it work, I guarantee you there will be a day like the one I had earlier this week, and the road to recovery will be a long and hard one.

I learned the hard way that even after almost 30 years in this Hobby that the line between “Girlfriend Experience” and “girlfriend” is very thin (thinner than I thought) and easily breached.  I learned a lot about myself, and now have to ask myself some hard questions and make some tough decisions.  I will be sad, mourn, pick up the pieces, and attempt to get up and walk again.  I will learn and grow from this and above all, I will not make the same mistake again.

I am writing this so you won’t make that mistake either.

 
And to this woman, who reads this forum regularly, I publicly promise that I will not divulge your name, or the details of our relationship.  I never had any desire to hurt or destroy any woman who chooses to be an escort, and that includes you.  Take care of yourself.

Seems like setting boundaries were hard since you were so taken by this woman.  Maybe, you should have asked her out on a non-paid date more toward the beginning to test if GFE could turn into GF.  And, since that probably wouldn't have worked, that might have given you an answer quicker.

It does sound like she was stringing you along which sucks.

IDK, you might want to hit up a therapy session and a dating app or two...

I'm no expert...I shy away from longer dates because I'm not sure I need to hear or be a part of the drama that always seems to be a part of these ladies' lives.  Seems they can only put up a cool chick/down for anything persona for so long before you see all that chaos...yikes!

Stay safe out there...

Sorry you had to go through it, but hang in there and a brighter day will dawn tomorrow or the next day…eventually…..

CR

Sorry that happened to you, but we are all not the same. I am very honest & trustworthy. Integrity is something that is required to be in my life. I have a real relationship with a man who started as a client over a decade ago & our love has blossomed into the greatest unconditional love ever imagined. You picked a liar it happens. No need to be butt hurt & talk stank because she’s an escort. It could happen to anyone who is not woke with their third eye open. Before wasting time & money do your due diligence and research the person it’s your responsibility.  Easy to point blame. Thanks for sharing, or venting. Maybe seek a good therapist it helped me when I wasted years on my children’ Father who’s a narcissist. Liars are losers.

Although it is unclear just what happened.

However, I’m not ready to paint all providers with the same broad brush. I had a long relationship with a woman I met in P4P.  We had some lovely times together including a short cohabitation. She was loving and compassionate.  Frankly my time with her was the happiest of my adult life. But she was much younger and wanted children.  She wasn’t mean or mercenary; she was just in a different place in her life.

I hope you mend. I’ve resolved myself to a permanent broken heart, but I hope your fate is different. If we ever met IRL, I’d be happy to buy you a beer and lend a friendly ear.  I wouldn’t presume to advise you, but I can say from experience that the pain will get less. It will take time and good friends have been a great help to me.

May the 4ce be with you.

Spent 5 years with one lady, including during Covid.  I let myself believe there were some genuine feelings there but I don't think she strung me along, she simply took advantage that I was willing to see her even though she had somewhat exited this sphere and didnt ask anything of me.  I sort of knew the end was approaching as she was getting busier with a new job, haven't heard from her in over 5 months, which is the hard part after spending 5 years seeing her.  Would have been better to have her tell me she no longer wanted to see me as I think that would make it easier for me.