First, do you realize that guys can "turn off" their whitelists. You can elect to have it not show in your settings. Some guys do this. For example, I'm posting as an alias so you don't see mine anyway, but I might have a bunch of whitelists under my username and elect not to show them. When I am trying to set up a date, if the lady wants to see my whitelists, I can turn it on for a day, to give her a chance to check it out, then turn it off again.
Second, many guys won't even give their TER handle to a lady, so whitelists would mean nothing to them anyway.
Third, a lot of ladies won't use whitelists as verification.
Fourth, there are cases of bribery. "If you write me a good review, I will whitelist you." or the opposite, "if you whitelist me, I'll write you a good review." these turn the whole review process and whitelist process to a joke, hence the reason for number three above.
Fifth, in this (LA) market, most new reviews written are for Kgirls and Kgirl bookers generally don't whitelist, so you'll see tons of LA hobbyists with reviews and no whitelists.
I could go on (ie guys that review lots of bp girls etc, ladies that have reviews on TER, but don't use TER themselves, so they don't WL anyone).
There are many reasons, but a hobbyist with lots of reviews and no whitelists is not necessarily a bad client. There are many other ways to verify and always have been.
I feel that not 1 provider whom you have seen cares enough to vouch for you to other providers that your a good date. Many use it as a marketing tool to attempt to get you to repeat again before whitelisting you, or write a good review & they will, but I do not. If your a true gentlemen have lots of reviews with no whitelist it makes me go hmhmhmhm....
Whitelisting takes less, than 60 seconds, so time is not an excuse. Sharing is caring & in this community I feel guys who write lots of reviews should have at least 1 reputable provider whitelist them.
Whitelist is not something I'm interested in developing. I generally do not share my TER ID. Been doing this before the whitelist was in existence and it has worked so far.
Interesting thought though. I never considered that it might be of concern. My refs are pretty solid and I'd rather keep my TER handle to myself. Less drama.
I feel the system is suppose to help the lady more than the guy. Guys with whitelisting should be easier to verify and are more established members of the community.
Just like with anything, there comes abuses to this system and some ladies have tried to use it for their own personal agenda. In the end it doesnt help them just hurts the community as a whole but they dont care anyways.
It seems the use of Whitelisting is about equal to board participation. Very low.
These boards are just not for posting ads, its also a way for people to get to know each other and then possibly scheduling a session. Its starting to feel like a new car lot around here but without any saleswomen to make the sale.
favors from providers . I exchange information with bros whose review I trust , I rely on dependable bookers to help me avoid who they think won't click with me.
In CA I almost exclusively see K-dolls/Divas but if I want to venture outside I have reputable friends bros and independents who make introductions.
In all honesty I find whitelisting self serving ,and like many reviews corrupted by the abusers.
I never give sensitive information or anything personal that can someday come to haunt me. This works for me and providers have the right and option to see or not see me.
Whitelisting takes less, than 60 seconds, so time is not an excuse. Sharing is caring & in this community I feel guys who write lots of reviews should have at least 1 reputable provider whitelist them.
I have found that being whitelisted has made it a lot easier get through screening and verifications with a new provider. I like to think of it as having a good reputation. I've posted a few reviews, and I guess if a provider wanted, they could look through those and see how my previous encounters have gone, but I guess you have to take those with a grain of salt. I mean, it's only my perspective on the 'date', I only know how I thought it went. The girl may have had an altogether other impression. I see whitelisting as the providers version of a review.
I give absolutely zero value to whitelists.
The first issue I have with the whitelist system is that there is no way to add comments to distinguish between those who are truly gentlemen and those who are barely "okay"... Sadly it is the second group that seems to live for being whitelisted and who often "convince" (ahem...) girls to give them that form of referral. As far as I'm concerned, since there is no field where you could attach a note to the supposed "referral" to say "He is ok, not LE and not a sadistic rapist, BUT he refuses to shower, overstays by 45 minutes and PM's your incall location and private phone number to anyone who asks..." Well, let's just say that I will always wait to hear from a lady someone named as his reference or reviewed here to email me the information she considers appropriate to share, and will never accept a whitelist as her "ok".
I had someone email me over a dozen times to ask me to whitelist him, each message more forceful than the other, after meeting only once. I don't think that the "whitelist" system was originally designed for that. Ideally it would be reserved for those guests who were actually enjoyable company, who we have seen at least 4-5 times and who we would recommend to a good friend. In reality, we have all seen that anyone can get whitelisted if he just pesters a woman long enough. It happened to me, and I'm sure it has happened to you Patricia. I had plenty of ladies tell me that their whitelist "referrals" were just a way to get some of the really forceful men off their backs, and there have been a few board posts about it as well... That should tell anyone to NOT consider whitelists as an acceptable form of reference/screening. Of course some men will still want to collect them and some ladies will feel better seeing them under someone's reviews, but to me they carry absolutely no value.
How can someone force you to whitelist them? I have seen this topic come up on the boards before, but I don't understand it. If they can force you to whitelist them, then they can force you to give them a P 411 ok or date check verification or a good reference for that matter. It makes no sense to me how whitelists can be so bad or corrupt but these other things are not?
Your point of a guy needing to see you 4 or 5 times to get a whitelist is also ridiculous. If a guy saw you once, and was a grntleman, and had good hygiene, and the proper donation, and didn't stay over his time then he should be eligible for a whitelist. Should we say that a client needs to see a lady 4 or 5 times before he can write a review?
You said you do not understand how someone can force a whitelist. Sadly, most girls who read the PO board are aware of how it is done more often than we'd like to admit, and many are aware of how it happened to me. I made sure to get the word out there, so it doesn't happen to anyone else. I will not post anything about the specifics here, this is not the forum for it and there is no sense in giving anyone ideas, but suffice it to say that it has been done many times. Before I was fully aware of the extent to which some men will go to get their way, be it getting a whitelist that they feel will "enhance their TER profile" (quite a ridiculous idea if you ask me, since this site has no section for reviewing men, so it should really not matter to anyone what others think of their reviewer profiles...), I made some rookie mistakes that put me in a position to have to deal with blackmail and risk getting outed. It is one of the main reasons why I am so selective about who I see now.
Yes, in theory someone could force me to okay him on other sites too. However, I'm sure you are aware that for example on Date-Check a lady can mark someone as "Highly recommended", "Recommended", "Barely Recommended - YMMV" and "Do Not See". If I mark you as "Do not see", you will know about it, but if I select any of the first 3 options, you will be notified that I gave you my reference, but you will never know which one of the first 3 I marked you as. I may have given you a "YMMV". Some girls will still see you, others will contact me to ask what happened. That system helps us girls a lot more, so I use and accept it.
The same is not true for TER's whitelists. I personally do not accept them, never have, never will, but I'm sure you will find women who do. In the end, you are entitled to your opinion and so is everyone else. As long as you don't try to change any lady's screening habits and persuade her to step out of her comfort zone, no harm no foul.
But as far as your idea about "eligibility" goes, I really disagree. Should someone who overstayed his welcome by 45 minutes, or had hygiene issues, or was simply my ultimate nightmare hobbyist be also "eligible" for a spot on the blacklist? I doubt you would like that. The truth is that when it comes to escorts meeting clients, some of the encounters will be average, a few will be mindblowing and a few will be downright sad... Just like most men will not review all of their encounters, nor do we, girls, feel like doing it. I will only blacklist someone who has seriously harmed me or ripped me off. It has been mentioned on this board many times that men felt blacklisting for bad reviews, last minute cancellations, etc, were a problem. I agree, it is ridiculous to do that. Blacklist should be for the worst clients, just like white list should be for the best. Visiting once, being clean, paying and leaving on time does not make you one of the best ones... Not even close. Visiting 4-5 times, being clean and a true gentleman, paying the required fees without mentioning them, and overall making us feel like being with you is not just about the money, so yes, being an ideal date a few times does. I'm sure getting pestered to write a review is just as frustrating as getting emailed a dozen times for a whitelist. I've heard of men getting "enticed" to write a great review by the threat of exposure. It works the same way with whitelists.
When I'm asked for a reference, I will share with a lady all the details I find useful - within reason, obviously. I will not say anything that could incriminate me, but I will share everything I feel could help her make a decision whether to see someone or not. I have found that the ladies who are most often given to me as references do the same. Make no mistake, we will mention when someone we whitelisted asked for it, as opposed to when we voluntarily did it. We will also characterize your behavior in terms of being gentlemanly and pleasant, or pushy and entitled. Just like you might finish your review with the line "I would definitely see her again", so do we. The man who blackmailed me, as well as another who stalked me for months, are perfect examples of why many ladies will avoid those who have a serious sense of entitlement and who take their "hobby" of seeing escorts way too seriously. It is not something any of us enjoy dealing with.
As someone said, the whitelist system is no longer what it was intended to be, hence I repeat my opinion: to me it is useless.
Back in the day, most people had a positive view on White Listing.
I remember when TER first introduced White Listing back in 2006, it helped speed up the screening process and made it competitive with other boards who were using a network system for verification.
I am sorry to read about the problems you had with that client. Being blackmailed and outed is a serious violation of one's privacy. It is really sad a few guys can ruin a system like this because of their hidden agenda.
Date Check and P411 are good resources but not everyone uses it. I considered shelling out the monthly/yearly fees for it but when I found out how few ladies in my area are using it, I decided against it. If it works for you, great. I understand and agree with the points you made about whitelisting but its is a feature of this board and many guys do need to reply upon it when their references are not around to send an email. Just like how ladies advertise on several boards, we guys have to have several avenues of verification.
TER's own description of white listing simply says this is a list of providers who have personally vouched for you. So just like with Date Check and P411, a provider can take these white listing for face value or pm the lady and ask for more information.
Thank you for writing about this - you make some very good points. In the past if I have had a great experience with a woman, I've written a review reflecting that and sometimes asked that after reading my review if she would consider White Listing me. I believe I've always been respectful when asking and have never asked twice. I have even had one women White List me who I did not review or ask to do so. Some of the woman who have White Listed me are well known providers with high review scores and I thought that was sufficient as a reference. However, I hadn't thought of the points you bring up and you make a convincing argument that TER should implement a system similar to Date-Check. For those of us who are safe, clean and gentlemen this would only serve to make things easier, and for the women it would provide an extra layer of comfort and security - a good thing all around.
That's how I see the whitelist. No one takes it as a substitute for references, so why bother? TER should just get ride of that function. Complete waste of time.
I disagree. It helps a lot. Makes screening faster and easier.
Do you think that girls who won't vouch for you would bother
to whitelist you?
According to Nora, yes. Check out her post. That's exactly why I don't bother asking to be white listed anymore. It's a waste of my time and the ladies' time.
You say "no one" takes it as a substitute for references. That isn't true. You could say "some" or maybe even "many" won't take it, but "no one?" you're wrong! Actually many do take whitelists as references. I have seen ladies who have used only whitelists as references.
K, fine. ***Almost*** no one accepts it, therefore it is ***virtually*** worthless.
Happy now?
I haven't looked at your reviews, but by your handle I am going to assume you see only or mostly kgirls. If that's the case then yes, a whitelisting is worthless for you. Kgirl bookers don't accept whitelists. Shit, they won't accept anything other than references from other kgirl bookers. Now outside of the kgirl world, many ladies don't accept whitelisting (but not "almost no one") and many do. I have been accepted by whitelist only, many times. I also see many websites that say things in their screening section such as: "p411 OR date-check OR TER whitelist OR two provider references required"
Anyway, I only made my original comment to you because statements making references to "absolutes" (always, never, everybody, nobody, all, none, etc) are usually incorrect as there are usually exceptions.
In any case, hey whitelists don't work for you and they work for me. No problem. No big deal. I understand there are many reasons for using them or not, as I pointed out in my reply to Patricia.
That should be your alias. The fact that you are the only one defending the WL should tell ya something!
I guess they don't count?
First, do you realize that guys can "turn off" their whitelists. You can elect to have it not show in your settings. Some guys do this. For example, I'm posting as an alias so you don't see mine anyway, but I might have a bunch of whitelists under my username and elect not to show them. When I am trying to set up a date, if the lady wants to see my whitelists, I can turn it on for a day, to give her a chance to check it out, then turn it off again.
Second, many guys won't even give their TER handle to a lady, so whitelists would mean nothing to them anyway.
Third, a lot of ladies won't use whitelists as verification.
Fourth, there are cases of bribery. "If you write me a good review, I will whitelist you." or the opposite, "if you whitelist me, I'll write you a good review." these turn the whole review process and whitelist process to a joke, hence the reason for number three above.
Fifth, in this (LA) market, most new reviews written are for Kgirls and Kgirl bookers generally don't whitelist, so you'll see tons of LA hobbyists with reviews and no whitelists.
I could go on (ie guys that review lots of bp girls etc, ladies that have reviews on TER, but don't use TER themselves, so they don't WL anyone).
There are many reasons, but a hobbyist with lots of reviews and no whitelists is not necessarily a bad client. There are many other ways to verify and always have been.
I honestly believe that a White Listing should only be given by a provider who has seen a hobbyist safely, on multiple occasions, or who has seen him once, and has no qualms, whatsoever, about seeing him again.
I am not “tooting my horn” but I have Never asked a provider to White List me. That would be rather “Low Brow.” Don’t you think?
Also, I have never had a provider suggest that she would White List me if I wrote a good review. I know it happens, and yes, I have had providers ask me if I would write a good review, sometimes I say yes and sometimes I say “maybe”… But the “Trade” of a good review and a White Listing , has never been discussed. Again; I know it happens, but never, thus far, to me…
On the flip side, it appears some providers never White List… For whatever their reasons, I respect their decision not to.
Just my 2 Lira
Cheers! The Vet..
I've had two girls whitelist me. I didn't ask either one to do it. I thought it was very nice of them to do that. I like to think I'm a good client, but it's nice to see some of the girls thought I was too.
I'm surprised at all the posts on this topic. I had no idea there was such controversy over it. I guess I've alway assumed that just there was more going on with a WL than I was able to access as only a Hobbyist. I figured a provider was able to access more detail from their end. Guess not, huh?
Well, I still like it. It makes me feel good, so there's that right?
are not into the white list thing. Sexy Kimora did give me one but since she retired and her reviews pulled, my reference apparently left with her.
I'm not really concerned; I've never had a problem being allowed in to the sandbox in which I love to play.
The Whitelist is simple. It expedites screening. If you'd see the guy again, he should qualify. Why would you refer somebody you wouldn't, Why wouldn't you refer somebody you would. The problem with a plain referral is it can take too long.
All those who have had bad experiences with men who wanted to be put on the Whitelist, who referred them? Apparently, you didn't get them off the Whitelist.
I always viewed that the Whitelist was just another tool for the ladies to use in determining who they would see or recommend. A lot of the K Girls don't do it, so if you hang out here a lot, you may have many reviews and no white list, but all the bookers will know who you are. It's up to the ladies how they feel about the whitelist anyways. I've met ladies who are okay with just the whitelist (usually if they know the provider) and I know there are many ladies who will still require more screening. Once again, it's the ladies that make the rules, but perosnally, I don't see how a lot of reviews and no whitelist is an issue. just my 2 cents
I have discussed the value of the WL, with several well respected ladies. It's a mixed bag. At the very least it is a starting point. Some girls still require 1 or 2 references. I usually provide 3 or 4, in case some are on vacation. Some girls contact the last provider I reviewed, irrespective of score or White List.
I know one well respected provider who will always attempt to contact a provided who was given an unusually low score. She sometimes gets some very interesting intel...
A guy with a long (over 20) list of reviews of well respected independent ladies, is expected to have at least a few White Listings, provided they weren't all 6 and 7's.
I truly respect and sympathize with Nora and others who have been abused and blackmailed.
Screening, whatever the method is essential in this business. I Girl can never "over-screen."
Stay Safe and Live Free!