...so I have hobbied for about 10 years- (haven't been active in last 2 years or so due to financial and health reasons, but have been getting back into it this summer)- and the president of my rotary club comes up to me and says "can we talk?'' seems he was contacted by a third party (guy whose wife I hit on a few years back after they got separated/divorced) calls him and says 'so do you know what your friend (that's me) has been up to??" so he tells him that if you google my name the results show me listed on a provider 'blacklist' (url attached below)
Ok here is the thing- I KNOW who I've been with and when, that I've never treated a lady improperly, and wasn't even in the hobby when the post was submitted- so I can't prove that its bogus- on top of that, I went to the site and without buying a membership, you can post anything about anybody totally anonymously, without recourse!! and the vast majority are posts on hobbyists that could never be validated (first name only- like 'Joe' in Boston- seriously!!)
So all I have to defend myself is the fact that the guy who brought the posting to light was a vindictive scumbag who is trying to make life miserable for me.
Legal Begal, how do I deal with this?? after reading the disclaimers on the site seems like there is nothing they will do to remove the posting-
if you want to send me your name I will check it out with full confidentiality, however in general this is a problem that a number of people have had to affront. The good news is that in does not mean jack shit, who would pay attention to such stupid shit?
You should write the site an email and explain the charge is incorrect and ask for a rebuttal. They probably will ignore you. You can complain to Google that it is untrue and defamatory, get on record with a certified letter with receipt. Threaten legal action if you cannot get satisfaction. They will probably ignore you. There is a way you can also set up a web site so when someone googles your name they get a note that the person identified as you is not you. Frankly speaking, this is an unfair sting but the easiest way is to ignore it. To get active is just to publicize the fact and make things worse. These groups pop up and pop off and then if attacked they disappear and resurface again. Hate mongers are hearty people. You might join the site and list the person who fucked you in retaliation, but in time the google shit gets old and only an ass would trace through 10 pages to find you.
This is the real risk in fucking around after you have identified yourself though some nitwit's screening process, which I have always warned against. If you got fucked fifty times a week you might easily forget that it was Testicle Tom who was the bastard and not Vern Jones. If you know who blacklisted you you might try to get them to remove the black from your balls, although the site seems to be as hellbent on wrecking havoc on the innocent as well as the guilty.
The only thing I can tell you is that this shit, like diarrhea, rarely sticks, it just runs off you and life gets better. And who is the cunt who was googling and spreading this shit, what does she have against you or is she just mad about the fucking she did not get? Making passes at female asses is what men do.....it is perfectly normal and legal. If it wasn't for her interest in you this would not be a discussion topic....
I went to one of the internet based reputation services, and for a hefty fee they can accelerate the process of seeing the posting move farther down the list/page on a google search- I'm thinking I might be able to do the same thing if I buy the url associated with my name and create a web presence just to flood the net with positive and unrelated stuff about me (facebook??) anyway, they suggested to just stay away- the more you get involved the more you get sucked in to their game and make it more of an issue -
appreciate your response- also about the screening forms some providers have you go through- always wondered about that- prefer to stay as anonymous as I can-
I do very light screening personally, but I do screen. When I run your email address and phone number into the client verification smart form, it pulls up black list history (if there is any), what city and state you live in, your name, other names associated with you, face book page, how long you've had your phone, if you are a member of TER and a few other things.
Anyway, if you only have one incident on the black list - the majority of providers will give you the benefit of the doubt - assuming maybe you and the provider didn't click, you made a date and forgot resulting in an NCNS, you asked too many questions and the girl thought you were "suspicious" or a "time waster".
Its when your name shows up repeatedly on the blacklist that you have to worry.
I think one incident can easily be forgiven by the majority of providers - if you find someone who wont see you based soley on the blacklist thing - move on.
NO! Of course not! and I wasn't even actively in the hobby when the post was made! (way back in March)
That is why I think the whole thing is bogus! on top of that, I played with the site a bit and was able to place a post on there (on a fictional name- 'John Doe') with out ever having to identify who I am or buy a membership- so like I said, I think someone totally uninvolved with the hobby was trying to fuck with me (figuratively)
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