Hey guys,
I am going top be very upfront about whatever I went through - so please advice. I just got divorced and wanted to see a woman - so I found the most expensive escort on erosmiami and invited her to fly down to New York (that is where I am based) - She asked me for $5000 for a 4 hour date including air ticket and said we could meet up - I checked her reviews on this site and she had 4 - both listed her as "delivered as promised" and infact gave her high marks for looks and performance - So I sent her my work information and half the donation using Paypal - she was good about keeping in touch via email but never returned my phone calls - I didnt think much of it - thinking that she was with a client - she finally said that "she lost her charger" and that she would call me as soon as she boards the airplane - then I received a call saying that the call would be as soon as she landed - the call never came and she never came -
This is what I want to ask you guys - I know I am pretty sure about the answer here but "is there a way I can get my money back" - also should I list her as a "rip-off" on the erotic review - but I am scared that she might retaliate as she has my work info -
What should I do guys??? I feel like crap!!!

you don't even know if it was a she, thank your lucky stars you got ripped off rather than popped being popped by law enforcement can cost 30-40 grand..move on

What recourse do you think you have legally?  I can just see it - going to the cops and telling them you were paying this lady to fly up and spend time with you; somebody you don't know, at that.  Then they see that she is an escort, and they put it all together.  Good luck.

Your money is gone.

Maybe you can complain to PayPal and get a refund that way.  They might not want to get involved, but it can't hurt to tell them you were paying her travel expenses to come see you and she didn't come.  The worst that will happen is they will say it's your problem.

The rest of your question isn't about the law, so this is the wrong place to post it.  Try her local board and the NYC board instead.  The general board would be another good choice.

Why don't you send *me* $2500?   I'll be honest and up front, and tell you I'm going to rip you off.  Isn't an honest relationship worth $2500 to you?

Give her precisely one chance to give the money back to you, plus another $500 for your trouble. If no money, then you file suit.

No reply?  File a "Jane Doe" lawsuit against her in Miami.  Get the suit filed, and then serve a subpeona upon eros-miami to gain her real identity.  If she has a website, you can serve subpeonas to her hosting company to provide the same.  

You already have her emails, so you have an IP address for her, and that means you can find her ISP.  Serve a subpeona on them to give up the address and name of her.  

I say: Do not worry about the fact that she has your work info.  If she ever tried to "do" anything with that info, then you can sue her for even more money, and perhasp even file criminal charges.

And yes, file a grieveance with Paypal and tell them that you recieved absolutely nothing for the money you paid her.  She was supposed to come and visit you.  No visit happened, so you should be entitled to a refund from them.  They'll likely side with you, believe it or not.

You did a dumb thing, but do notlie down and take it.  Theguy that said you money is gone?  Yes, it is, but you CAN get it back (and you should get it back...go and get it).

Best of luck to you.

BUT Be careful, from my experience in being "ripped Off" unfortinatly it is not that easy, and this could get messy for you, look I have been ripped off way more than that  on legit issues & it was impossible to collect, your best bet is to threaten  that if you are not immediatly refunded you will supenna & possible criminal charges, that might work, then move on & don't make that mistake again, meet a local nice girl that you can see on a regular basis.   i was ripped off on bad check & gave the perosn a chance or I was going to have them arrested it was only $400 & they chose jail rather than working something out to pay off the $400

I know all the CA deadbeats run to FL.

But if somebody were to ask me to recover $2500 against somebody who works in a cash economy, and probably doesn't stay more than 6 months in one place, and is already gun-shy of the law, I'd say, friend, you're a bigger optimist than I could ever be.  

IMHO, $2500 burns up very quickly in collections work, and it gets to be throwing good money after bad.

If I'd lost $300 to a cash-and-dasher, that is one thing. But $2500? I'd at least make some effort to recover it.

I'd AT LEAST try to get my money back through Paypal.  With Paypal, you can file to get your money back. Tell them that the seller never delivered any goods or services (as simply as that). Paypal will then give that person a certain number of days to respond.  They will have to have a really good excuse as to why they did not return the money. If they do not (or they simply do not respond) Paypal's protection guarantee will probably give you your money back.  You must at least TRY to get your money back, man. Go to Paypal.com and see the disputre resolution process.  You have only 20 days to get the ball rolling, or they will say it is too late.  Hurry!

I see the potential beauty of this scam though.  The "girl" merely has to wait and see just how far the man is willing to go to recover his money. Notice that all talk was through email only.  Most likely a very clever guy.  In a worst-case scenario, he just refunds the money.  Best-case?  Keeps it, because the guy is too chicken to follow through and recover. $2500 for doing absolutely nothing.  Pull-off just one of these a week (in up to 20 different markets) and that is $125,000 per year.  A nice scam.

This is no different than a guy who sells an iPod on eBay and then never ships it.  He has a certain amount of time to "make things right" before he gets penalized in some way.  He'll hold out until it becomes clear that if he does not make good on the deal, he'll have bad consequences. Several of you have told this guy to just take his lumps.  What if he listens?  That makes it the perfect scam. Dude, don't let yourself be taken by this prick.  Get your dman money back.

paypal, or anybody who sits still, and that's the way to go.

You gotta understand the skip mentality.  It's very unlikely this is the 1st time she's done this - if it is, she's probably paranoid.  Either way, she's not going to sit still while he's trying to get the money back.  

The legal process makes you go thru several steps - serve a complaint, give her time to answer, before you can even get a judgment - then you have to go searching for assets.   Many states allow you to attach property on an unsecured contract, but you don't know what property she has, and if you did, it's still an incredible PITA, and a lawyer's gonna ask twice that for a retainer.

Of course it's a scam, and a nice one.  But his problem is to get his money back, without losing even  more - if his motive is to reform the world or protect TER, he'd be a politician, and getting his money from us, not the escape artists.

We have 6 figure judgments against licensed professionals who manage to escape & evade for years.  In the collection business, $2500 is really not a lot; one of the dumbest mistakes a person can make is to look at the claim value alone, without also looking at the method of recovery to evaluate probability.  Like to start, where cna he find her?  THen does he really want to talk about this in court?   OJ Simpson is in FL for a very good reason - it's the deadbeat paradise.

I think he probably CAN get it back through Paypal.  But the guy only has 20 days to get that ball rolling.  No matter if the seller responds by saying that it was for illicit services. That means that the transaction should never have taken place and Paypal will demand thatthe seller do the refund.

I think the most likely situation is that this scammer operates with the assumption that a certain percentage of buyers will not try vigorously to get their money back (fearing family/work finding out).  But for the percentage that do try hard, the scammer probably complies.  That way, they can continue the activities without getting busted by anyone.  Actually it is quite brilliant.  If you could have a 50% success rate (and give up on 50%) wouldn't YOU be willing to give it a shot? I would.

But this guy must go a little beyond the simply asking for the money back.  He has to go through with certain steps.  Show the scammer that he is serious.  Paypal has the actual bank account info (and verified address, etc) of the seller.  It is not easy to open a Paypal account without giving easily verifiable info.

I'm not a lawer, but I do deal with PayPal quite a bit.
1) File with PayPal, for services not received.
2) If PayPal is unable to recover funds, hopefully you used a credit card. If So file then with your Credit Card to recover funds.
   PayPal does offer buyer protection, but just for eBay purchases. The protection is just a $1000 insurance policy. If you pay for anything with PayPal you should always use a credit card to have real protection.
  As for the job threat, since you are divorced it is possible that if she was to try to interfere at the job, you could always say 'your ex is putting someone up to this'. Then let her know that you are going to report her to the authorities. You would have her for attempted theft, and or fraud. She did promise to fly to you and never delivered. IMO  

Great answer, I think t is ourageous to rip good folks off with any kind of scam, it is not illegal to have a comapanian I would pay for quality if had the cash it would be worth it,

It does sound like "a guy" doing the scam not an actual lady, heck he could even pay a lady to make a couple of phone calls if he wanted to

I agree about the scam & refunding the squeeky wheels cash, I bet that is the case

Absolutely.  To Trustno2:  I seriously doubt you have much to worry about at the job.  What do they have, the main number?  Exactly what 60-second man said: If anyone tries to badmouth you, you can just chalk it up to the divorce.  But I doubt they'll try and do that.

I think you need to show that you are not afraid to take some steps to get your money back.  I think it is is bad that others here have told you to kiss your money goodbye because you allowed yourself to get suckered.  Many of us have been suckered in this activity (I know I have). You're one of the guys who actually has a shot at getting your money back.  Be bold and go and get it.  Don't let the folks deter you. (Think about it: One of them might even be the person responsible)

Send this person an email and tell them that through Paypal, you are quite confident that you have the ability to locate their real name AND location. And that you're willing to do what it takes to get what is due to you.

If she is dependent upon her reputation then she will try to save herself somehow by making things right with you.  If she still doesn't do anything, then go ahead and list her as a rip off because she did rip you off.

Use your big head here.  What is she going to do with your work info?  Tell your boss you gave her $2500 and she did nothing for it?  You will likely not get fired for it even if you are a pastor at a church.

Hopefully by now you've learned your lesson.  Like Tori always says: know your provider...and her reputation.  You don't drop thousands of dollars with someone you have never even met.

I am so sorry for your mishap with this shameless person. It puts a very black taint on your emotions as well as your position to ever invite someone else up to you in that manner. There ARE reputable girls out there who would never dream of doing something like this. I know this is probably with poor taste to even suggest but if you are in the market for someone to completely take your mind off of the situation I would LOVE to accommodate such. I might know a few things to put that smile back on your face : )) ... Maybe you could even brag on the board about what a wonderful time you had afterwards and maybe she might see it. How unfortunate for her that she missed out…lol

In any matter…the moral of this story is that yes, this happens. It is wrong and karma will come back to her. But there are still good trustworthy people in the world… good luck ..xoxoxoxo

EOM

offering me is much better.   I'd taste better, too.  Although I can come up with crocodile tears if you like.

If I were in his situation (as I have been), I would consider it an honor to have a provider make such an offer, and would likely take her up on it. It seems to me as though she is trying to protect the industry, to some degree anyhow, by at least offering to make his experience a good one.