I have become a foster parent for a child whose mother is serving time on a prostitution charge. I am a good friend to the mother of this and know her to be a good parent. The father is out of the picture. I think it is best for the child to be put back with her mother as soon as possible. Knowing both very well. The people of child protective services informed me it may be awhile after the mother is released before she regains custody if she regains custody.

There was never child abuse/endangerment charges of any kind filed against her and she never exposed her child to any of her clients besides me and my wife. She is in my opinion an good mother and I know she loves her daughter. Just repeated prostitution charges, three in the last year. The mother will be released for jail in mid January. She has decided to retire from the business.

I have arranged for the mother with her consent to have a job working at my business and an affordable two bedroom apartment which I own on her release. I have also paid for the retainer on a family law attorney for her to get the paper work going.

What else will they look at to see if she is fit and stable enough to get her child back?

Is there anything else me or my wife can do to speed this process along?

I see this lady as a close friend of the family and I care greatly for my foster child and want what is best for them both. In my opinion that is to being them back together as a family. Thanks for any advice.


P.S. She got busted because she failed to screen properly. Providers do your own screening and screen well. LE can be worse than an abusive client. They cost my friend and her daughter everything, even each other for the time being. Everyone should screen everyone else in this hobby.

hats off to you for being so generous!!!

short of her having a husband, you have all the basis covered.

The only thing that might help is some type of ongoing therapy/recovery program. Not that she needs it, it just goes a long way in sending the message that your serious about a lifestyle change.

I hope things work out for her family!!!

It stands for Court Appointed Special Advocates.

They are an independent friend of the court organization that does investigations into the circumstances involving cases where child custody is an issue.

There may be a similar organization in your area, a check with the probate court people would probably be the place to look.

The reason to contact them, is that they would know best as to what judges and social agencies would be looking for when deciding to award custody back to a parent.  I believe their advice would also be no charge as they subsist on donations and/or funds appropriated by the court or legislature.

The idea of your friend going to a parenting course sound just like the thing to convince the powers that be to get them together again.

My mom served as executive director for such a program in my town for many years, and did some wonderful things to help families.

Check it out.

My kudos to you Scoed for all you are doing to help this person.

nice to see how wonderful you are being. Also this should inform mom escorts of the possible problems that the biz can create in certain jurisdictions that are unkind to sex workers...

They will also look to make sure that, although, she is now out of the business, has a new job & her own place, that the child is in a stable environment. If the child is school age, is he/she getting to school everyday on time? Is the child on a schedule if not school age... up every morning at the same time, bedtime routine(yes, they will look into this-as least in WI they do). They will also want to know EVERYONE that the child will be around, and they will do a background screening on all those persons.. if someone doesn't pass, they will not be allowed around the child, and if the mother does, she could loose custody again. The social worker WILL pop up unannounced at all hours of the day at first, just to see what's going on, as they know that people are always on their best behavior when they know they have an appointment... therefore, until there is some trust established, they will be in her life ALL the time, unannounced.

I also agree with the above poster about the type of social worker she will receive.. if they don't honestly believe that the mother has changed her ways, she will do everything in her power to make this as hard as possible. Good luck & you are a wonderful person for helping her out in her time of need.

That she will go back into the business. Some social workers enjoy their work, others who spend day-after-day pulling kids get very jaded.

You are an amazing human being for offering her so much help. They will give her many hoops to jump through. Tell her to jump through all of them with a smile on her face.

When she gets out, most likely they will have a small hearing( not in a court room.) It will consist of you &  your so, a bunch of social workers, her lawyer, her, and possibly the child. Pay special attention why this is going on for the social worker that really enjoys their job. That person will be her biggest "friend" in all of this.

First, it will start with supervised visitation. Then, as that goes well it will gravitate to more time with the child. Some social workers like to use scare tactics, like LE but when they see what kind of parent she really is the tune will change. When she gets her child back she will have to undergo parenting classes, which can always be helpful for any parent.

A couple of more bases to make sure are covered; she cannot be on any form of state assistance to prove self sufficiency, and get the child a top notch child psychologist( court appointed ones are usually overworked, underpaid will side against the mother just because ect. ect.)

I myself don't have children, but I have seen this go down a few times. It erks me because I know quite a few providers that have given their children top-shelf child care while they are away, and that is usually only a few hours while the child is at school, or sleeping at night. The child's quality of life was poverty before the mother became a provider. Now they have a much  happier mommy who doesn't have to worry about how the bills will be paid, or who never gets to see their child because they work 2-3 jobs just for survival.

She no doubt, was a provider to give her child a better life. I love how society thinks all providers are drug addicted, uneducated sex slaves. Don't worry about one jaded government worker. I would be jaded too if I only made 20 bones a year. That worker may have some say so, but ultimately not the final say so about the return of the child.

My question is, what right did they have to take her child in the first place? Was it because of her occupation or that she is serving time? You already stated she never abused or neglected. Here they wouldn't have taken her child, even if she was doing time. Unless, she didn't have  a temp guardian while she was away

While she never abused the child her ex husband did abuse the child. I was the one that took the mother and child to the ER the day he did. After that they were looking at her to make sure she was not involved in the abuse that occurred on that day. When she was sentenced to a little more than three months jail time, they decided to intervene as they felt the home was not stable enough for the child. I was going to be the temp guardian but instead my wife and I had to go to court to become the child's emergency foster parents when child protective services stepped in. I had to update my home by converting my office into a bedroom with closet, add a door to the hall from that room and remove the one to my bedroom from that room to meet their standards.

The reason she was providing in the first place was to pay for the divorce and fight for custody of her child to protect the child from him as she knew her ex was an abusive, drug-addicted conman. Then to pay for the hospital bills for her child because the courts failed to listen to her. The only thing I could blame her for is not screening the way tried to show her how to do. Once LE catches you they keep coming back I tried to warn her of this but she failed to listen. now she has lost everything. All she was trying to do is protect her child.

herself and her child from an abusive husband/father.

why wasn't the father put in jail for child abuse/domestic violence ?
is he in jail now ?
what steps did the police take to help her before she had to resort to prostitution ?

im asking because i hear this story quite alot and the women can't get the police to do anything to help them until they put up an escort ad and then ring ring, RESCUE MISSION CALLING.

Her day job only paid $9 an hour and was part time. Lawyers cost money the ex had it from selling drugs. She needed money to fight him in court to remove his custody rights. She did not want her daughter raised around drugs and her ex both used and sold drugs. Plus her ex hit my friend and she was afraid of him. While he had a violent temper but until April of this year he had never hurt his daughter. Even my friend was more afraid he would neglect his child than hurt her. My friend was very wrong.

In April while on court ordered visitation, he hurt the child bad. He dropped the child off at her incall after beating her. I was my friends client at the time. It was the first time seeing her. I took them to the hospital. He was supposed to have health insurance on the child but had let it laps leaving them with no insurance and a large bill. The child still is having issues because of what he done.

Because he had not hit the child before that day in April and my friend never reported the violence against her out of fear for retaliation from him, the cops had no reason to step in before that. While I took my friend and her child to the hospital, he fled the state. He was busted not to long ago in Detroit on drug trafficking charges. He will be in jail for a long time ether for federal drug charges or in Utah for child abuse. He is considered a flight risk as he ran from the cops before and is being held without bail. Which is good. May he rot jail until he dies.

yet its a dangerous job..
while family values are constantly being preached to us.
yet abuse at home is what drives 75-90% of prostitutes into prostitution.

where they have a chance of meeting someone like you.

i wonder what would've happened if she had stayed in the abusive situation.
she would not have been judged as harshly, i dont think.

Wow, scoed...you are are the ipitome' of greatness in all forms.  More than just kudos to you!

Also...would very much like to add not only for the situation at hand, but in general for all the land with regard to most, if not all cases out there....

Under The Blindfold, Lady Justice Weeps!

Who would not help if they seen a child in need? I think most would do the same if faced with child they knew as I was.

I would like to thank everyone for there advise especially mrfisher informing me about CASA. They have assigned a volunteer to work with my foster daughter. So far she has been great. She is not jaded like the social worker and seem genuinely concerned for the child unlike some who claim to be looking out for the child. Again thanks everyone.

If anyone has anymore advice I will continue to monitor this thread.