So, I think I need some advice, and this seems like it'd be the appropriate place to ask.  I'm not really sure how to proceed, having spent rather a lot of money and been disappointed. I'm not sure whether it was the provider or if it's just me/us.  Here's the scenario:

My wife and I, after years of talking about it, decided to engage a provider to live out our MFF threesome fantasy.  I frankly couldn't believe my good fortune, having been thinking about this since I was, I don't know, 12 or so.  We would have tried to find a non-professional to do it, but we wanted to make sure it actually happened while we were still young enough to enjoy it. So we rented a very nice hotel room in Vegas a month in advance and started looking at websites and reviews.  The only stipulation my wife put on it was that I couldn't write a review (she's an extremely private person).

I should point out that, prior to this, I'd never engaged an escort, not because I have any moral or political problems with it, but because so much of what I enjoy about sex is my partner's enjoyment; if she's not having any fun, I'm not having any fun. So the worst possible thing that could happen is that I would engage an escort who would just seem to be waiting for it to be over (a la Jane Fonda in Klute). I rather wank.

So we did a ton of due diligence, contacted a handful of ladies to see about scheduling, etc.  The wife and I have a type, it should be pointed out: athletic, thin, not ridiculously porn-star chesty, if you know what I mean.  It's hard to find as, in what I'm sure is an attempt to play to prevailing tastes, D-cups are the installed standard. So the girl we agreed on, who said she really liked working with couples and has several couples reviews, looked in her pictures like our type. Formidable. Athletic. Lean. Though she had bigger breasts than we would have chosen, we figured that we'd rather have someone who wanted to work with a couple, someone who was going to be into it, rather than the perfect physical match who just laid there.  So we were nervous but excited. It was going to cost us rather a lot of money for this experience, but given how outstanding her reviews were, we figure she'd be the right one.

Unfortunately, though quite cute, the girl who showed wasn't really built like the one on the website. Rather than athletic and lean, she was soft and curvy with a little extra weight. I'm not talking about someone who had put on some weight but rather someone with a completely different body type. And who had put on a little weight. But, as I said, she was cute and very nice and we were already in for $1K+, and we'd sunk a lot of money into the trip, so even though she wasn't our ideal, we could still have a hot experience. I mean, when is life ever perfect?

Problem was, for whatever reason, she was completely not into it.  I don't know whether it was that she doesn't actually like working with couples, or she wasn't attracted to us (or one of us), or whether both of us had expectations that were too high, but she really did seem to be laying back and thinking of England. You know, I read a lot of the reviews on here and I know that suspension of disbelief has to be a large part of the experience for guys that are into the hobby. So, with the exception of her oral skills (on me that is, that were exceptional...she didn't seem to know her way 'round the wife at all), this was a huge let-down for both the wife and me.  I mean, I got the wife off and she me, but the girl was kind of a semi-animate, unconvincing prop to the proceedings.

We had paid for a couple hours, but after the first go round, we were not really up for playing any more with our un-engaged playmate. So we lay around for a while chatting, and she really is a very, very sweet girl that we went away wishing nothing but the best for. But the experience actually made us feel pretty bad about ourselves. We're in our late 30s/early 40s, both quite fit for our age and at least above average looking, but she was so clearly not into us that we both walked away thinking, "if an escort can't work together either the enthusiasm or acting ability to get turned on by you, we must be pretty objectionable". Or maybe she was having a bad day, I don't know know.

So here's the question: should we try again? We talked about it and felt that, although it wasn't the experience we wanted, we still wanted the experience we wanted (if that makes sense). Dan Savage (and others) call HBBs (HotBiBabes) "unicorns" for a reason...if we go back to waiting for that special woman to come into our lives, it may never happen (and, as noted, we're not getting any younger...all this age-anst may also be a function of the fact that it's New Year's Eve, so you may want to discount that factor...).  However, getting another escort who wasn't (or wasn't at least convincing in her acting abilities) into us would *really* suck.  It's clear to me that, at least to some degree, the reviews are gamed, manipulated, perhaps even falsified at times (at least, I've come to believe that about our friend, though, again, it could just have been that, while she was an enthusiastic participant with others (men and couples) she just wasn't that into us). Also, it could be that we just don't have the ability to suspend disbelief adequately to engage someone who, let's face it, is only fucking you for the money.  I'd be interested any feedback...on both sides of the fence (provider and client) there's a ton of experience and that's precisely what we lack.

From what you say there is still interest, so why deprive yourself.  That said, if you don't dig deeper into the root of the problem, you're more likely to repeat at least some of it.  There are well reviewed ladies here in town that see couples or do doubles, that have privately told me that they aren't really into it.  Others truly love it.  Still others are lesbians unless on the clock.  Unless you can tell which is which, it probably doesn't matter.  If you read several of a ladies reviews, the pieces tend to come together.  It's pretty rare that a lady will have pages of great reviews and not be able to convince you.  I'm guessing that since you're new at the game, you don't really know how to tell the difference.  The mistakes in this game get expensive quickly, so I'd suggest that you take your time and get it right.

Oh, and plenty of ladies are likely to volunteer.  That's the wrong answer to your problem.  Sorry ladies.

If your wife wants to try being with another lady, then do so.
I know several ladies in the business that see couples.
One lady in particular told me the way to make a couple happy is to please the wife.
The man also gets to be happy as well, but she told me men want their partners happy first.
It does make a lot of sense from my point of view.

Balboa

The way I read it, the girl that showed up was not the girl pictured.  If that were true, you were a victim of bait and switch.  In such a case it would be understandable that you were disappointed right from the beginning, before any action started.

Expanding on that same point, you don't say whether the girl you booked was independent or from an agency.  With the exceptions of Haley Heston PC and 100Proof, agencies are generally bad news in Las Vegas, and bait and switch is pretty much the norm with them.

You say that you did your research by "looking at websites and reviews."  However, you didn't say if you looked at this website and read the reviews on it.  I wonder because you also state the girl you chose had "several couples reviews."  There is no searchable way to find "couples reviews."  The only way to determine if the review was for a couples experience is to read the text of each of the reviews.  If you did that, then it was indeed due dilligence.

If you're not allowed to write a review, why are you allowed to write this post?  It pretty much reads like a review to me.  Also, if this was the first escort you have experienced, why are you using an alias?

You mention Jane Fonda in "Klute."  (Wouldn't a more appropriate example have been Elisabeth Shue in "Leaving Las Vegas?")  If there is one thing I've learned over the years, it's that when it comes to providers and the hobby in general, Hollywood gets it wrong every time.  Forget what you see in the movies and on TV!

Perhaps you were the victim of inflated expectations.  When the girl shows up, just go with it, and have a good time (or at least try to have a good time).  If it wasn't enjoyable, well, cross her off your list and see somebody else next time.

What is it with the antipathy toward aliases? I just wanted to segment this particular question from other posts I've made because it might be identifying, either of me or the provider.  Which would also violate the spirit of the agreement I have with my wife re: not writing a review...Not to mention I really do want to give the provider the benefit of the doubt regarding perhaps she just had an off day. But I honestly (here's why the question to you all) have nothing to compare it to, so what the hell do I know?

The pictures on her web site are her, but they are highly retouched, altered, and stretched.

And yes, of course we read more or less every review this particular (independent) provider had. Mostly 9s/10s. And a significant sample size, as well.

And I wouldn't say my expectations were framed by Hollywood...I was merely using that as an example of what I was hoping wouldn't happen...but in fact did.

I guess the question is, per Little Phil, if the reviews seem to be (at least to a degree) gamed, how does one tell the difference between the ladies who really enjoy this providing this particular service and those who are merely willing to?

I have to agree with Little Phil. There are tons of ladies who will fake being into other women strictly to get paid. They can still do doubles and will be good at it if the guy is not into bi-sexual ladies. It has been my experience that most men who are into doubles are into women who are into each other.

The next time you and your wife want to play with a lady who will play with your wife as well. The provider needs to have SEVERAL reviews in which the content of the reviews CLEARLY state the PROVIDER performed DATY on another female.....and that they both enjoyed it........and the guy enjoyed them......

There are ladies here who are lovers outside the business.......both you and your wife should do some research and find out who is licking whom off the clock....and you will have a combination that works!!

The only thing I would add to Phil's post is contact some of the reviewers of the couples review and look at the 2 lady reviews and contact the reviewers.  In my experience about 1/3 of the listed Bi ladies really are Bi, the rest are just into it for the money.  A lot of this hobby is acting, but their not going to fool your wife.

I know 2 ladies in Vegas that are really Bi and understand that the wife must be totally satisfied for the couple to be happy.  Trust me if she's happy you will be happy, over and over again.

See what your wife says first.  If she is willing to try again.  If so, then YES!!!!!  Try it again.  Don't let one bad apple ruin what should be a great experience.    Also, I would suggest finding a lady who advertises on her website that she does enjoy couples, and a lady who is reviewed.  I know you said the other lady was reviewed as well though.  

I do wish yall the best of luck and just know, not all ladies are like that  

So sorry to hear your first experience didn't go as you have thought it would.
I agree with Phil, don't give up there are ladies out there who I am sure can give you what you are looking for and then some.

Reviews are a tool to help you figure out who is who.
But the reviews are not a bible and sometimes reading between the lines is needed.

You really shouldn't take the experience personally or feel like something is wrong with you or your wife.
Sounds to me something is wrong with her.

Did you guys chat first over the phone ?
I personally think it is very important to chat to see if you feel a connection and chemisty.
Because if there is over the phone chemistry ,pretty much you will have that same chemistry in person.

If the person who shows up doesn't look like photos then don't be shy to turn the lady away.
If someone isn't what you expected from the first moment they walk through the door,  how can the rest of the evening be
what you expected. "wink wink"

I tell my couples- the session is about the lady and the guy is lucky to be there.......
No worries the guy gets to have fun too, but the lady ( your wife) is the queen.
That is my way of letting the couples know that I am really bi and I am really into what I do.
Btw ,attraction doesn't come just from outside beauty

Hope you won't give up
I am sure with the right person you can have all your fantasies come true.

All the best
Happy New Year
xoxo CindySpice

YOU!

When a guy says  - " I really do want to give the provider the benefit of the doubt regarding perhaps she just had an off day."

???? How can someone as you put it- not know thier way 'round the wife at all ..... because of an "off day"
And what is an off day ? Maybe a lady can have an off day in looks because she was having a bad hair day ,or she was a bit bloated , or she got a pimple ( hey we are human that can happen )
But how can service change because of " off day"
For me not exceptable to not provide 110% of myself.
If I am not up to it , not in the mood I would rather cancel and help find someone else. But that is me.
So not sure about the whole "having an off day"

So how does one tell the difference between a lady who really is into it or not ?
I still say through phone conversation and not just because the lady says - yes of course I love couples .
The conversation can get deeper then that and that is where you can tell.

If not, other then that you can't know for sure .
While reviews help a lot to figure out more or less ( no 100% ) who is who  , you have to keep in mind the review was the experience of that particular person who wrote it.
And since not every single person writes their experience , and some reviews are not exactly true ( for good or for bad )
You can't paint your picture just based on reviews.

Like you can find reviews of hotels or restaurants that one person may rave about while another not so much.
So it happens in all walks of life

You just have to keep trying.
And make sure you have all your wants , needs and desires garanteed .
It can be done.
xoxo CindySpice

What I mean by reviews not always true ( for good or for bad)
Since the review is from the perspective of the writer , things can be not so accurate.

For an example let's say a guy writes - wow this is the best bbbj I ever had.
But it is the only bbbj he ever had how does he know it is THE BEST
Or if a guy writes - I was disappointed she didn't DFK me ......
Well maybe something was wrong with the guys breath or maybe he is a heavy smoker.
Or a guys says - she doesn't like being on top ...... No she doesn't like being on top because you are Waaaaaaaayyyyyy to big and it hurts.
Or guys says - well she wasn't really into the sex , why because she didn't pretend you made her come 10 times and that hurt your ego ? It doesn't mean she wasn't into the sex.

Problem is people read reviews and sometimes take things too literally. Let's not forget the review is from the perspective of the writer. The reader should use a review as a tool and read between the lines.
Like if a lady has many reviews that let's say says - she gives an awsome massage, then most likely that statement will be true to every person who hires that lady.

One review written about me was changed. At first it was a perfect review that told the story just as it happened. Then it got changed to a non flattering review ( why ? well that is a whole other story , but that doesn't matter right now)
Point is the reader is reading something that wasn't really accurate.
So yes sometimes a review isn't the exact truth.....

The system may have some flaws , but it is still THE BEST way to find out who is who.

As I said - it is a tool , not a bible.
xoxo CindySpice

Just some food for thought
xoxo CindySpice

Cindy, Allure, Tasha, and everyone else who took time to respond,

Thanks very much for you input.  Very helpful, indeed.  I think the answer is to try again but to look to more than just the reviews, and to look to the reviews with a bit of a critical eye. There seems to also be a reputational element in play on the discussion boards, as well. The very fact that there seems to be a bi-modal distribution of reviews where you'd expect a normal distribution suggests that there's something other than mere factual reporting going on in the reviews (I've actually considered trying to write a script to do a statistical analysis of the reviews...It'd be interesting to see what kind of bias is uncovered. For example, the ownership bias, wherein one rates something one already has more highly than when when doesn't have it (in this case, an experience), I'm sure applies, skewing the upper end of the ratings).

In any event, it sounds like perhaps we just got the wrong girl.  We'll have to plan another trip to Vegas and try again. At least we won't be so nervous next time and be able to articulate what we want (and don't want, for that matter) better than we were the first time. Thanks again for your responses.

You're fortunate to have such and open minded and adventurous wife, I'd definitey give it another go. Just research a little more thoroughly. Maybe try one of the lovelys who have replied here already.