To be able to be "new" all over again? To still have all the jitters, all the excitement, all the eagerness of your 1st brothel visit? To remember a time before you became jaded? Before it all became old hat.
Well, have I got a deal for you ... Sponsor my 1st time. For the low, low price of $15.00 American, you can pop your cherry all over again. Relive the joy of your first time vicariously through me.
I will report back in graphic, vivid, enthusiastic detail. Magically transporting you back to a simplier, more innocent time.
My abundance of libido and absence of disposal income can be your ticket back in time. Can you really put a price on that? Yes, you can. 15 bucks. And for an extra 5 you can even smell my finger afterwards.
Okay, that last line was a joke. But the rest of this post is completely serious. Act now.
*Offer valid to legal U.S. citizen only. In the event of premature ejaculation or impotency, contributers forfiet all legal right to riembursement. Offer void where prohibited by law. I really, REALLY gotta get laid. Thank you.
My first TER review was of a blonde with a 9 appearance, 2 service. I have no desire to relive that experience, oddly enough.
I have to admit my first hobbyist experience/review was some time earlier, and a lot more fun (a Thai/Swiss young lady by the name of Lilly, definite 8/8 if we scored here, but a long time out of the game and on to other parts of her life)... but I still wouldn't want to go back, not for all the tea in China. I've made too many friends and had far too many good times.
Not because you've refused to buy into some yahoo's dream, but because I wanted to read that review, but it's gone. Imagine that, she didn't stick around with service like that.
As for yoda, WOW. Not sure if he's just got a great self image, or if he's fighting with delusions, but I have to agree with Smarty; this could get to be fun!
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