I met Heather D'Angelo at party.  We shared a drink, and she showed me a few dance moves.  Immediately she was my choice for that week's dance date. I suggested the Blue Martini in Market Square, and to my surprise by the next night she had called the club, knew the time the band started and learned that it was Latin Night. "I know how to Salsa and Cha-cha, but since you are interested in Disco, would you like me to find a different club?"  I was impressed, she researched our plans and was prepared for an alternative.  Well I had taken a few Salsa lessons during Puerto-Rican week at work, and I was happy to try something new.

Heather proved to be an excellent dance partner, and she was able to teach me several technical dance moves.  "The Salsa is done with a step back, a step forward, a pause then forward, back and pause.  To signal a turn you lift your arm and turn her hand in the direction you want to go". She also showed me how to dip, which scared me to pieces since I was having back problems.  "No, you don't have hold me up, I lean back like this and you place your hands behind my back.  You see, you're not holding up me up at all".  I was amazed, she was right, it was easy as pie.  Heather gave me my first dip.

But the best part of the dip, and the evening, was gazing into an enormous mountain of cleavage.  And I'm not talking about cute little mounds of flesh, this was some "Traffic Stopping Tit-Meat".  She wore a tight red corset and her breasts heaved out of the top.  She had to take a deep breath to get the elevator doors to close.  And when they opened, it was "Big Boob Shock and Awe".  Jaws dropped, necks turned and people literally stopped in their tracks to watch us walk by.  And she had this little move when she danced; subtle movements of her shoulders caused H..U..G..E amounts of sway in her boobs.  They knocked over an elderly couple dancing next to us, and sent of tray of drinks flying across the room. These were "Weapons of Breast Seduction." (The waiter really wasn't watching where he was going).

So, in the tradition of Ol'Desperado's seal of approval, I hereby grant Heather D'Angelo the "Ishootcraps Long Date Certification".  She's the total package.  She has concierge skills, she is intelligent, easy to talk to and fun to be with.  

And she has big boobs.

And if you want to learn more about our date, as customary, the link below will take you to her profile page.  My review should be near the top.