This has never happened to me.. usually they won`t get back to you at all. It doesn`t do us any good at all. to hear this.. and not her name.. Please do us all a favor and say who it is.. !! THANKS..
I hope not, and I doubt so, from being in contact with some wonderful ladies lately (especially those with initials L.C.!!)
However...I contacted a Vegas woman regarding a referral the other day. The man in question mentioned her by name to check as a reference.
Now, I always THOROUGHLY screen the men who contact me for a date, but if the man in question has specifically mentioned a lady who will vouche for him, I will certainly get in touch with her and ask her opinion. NO, not to verify him, but just in case there is something specific I should know.
A response to my email I received from another provider seemed bitter and spiteful. She said, "Go screen your own clients. It's easy to just go ask another woman, but don't be lazy and go do your own work."
Yikes! Now I know I have thin skin, but this really did bother me. I meant no harm by contacting this woman, nor did I intend to rely solely on her "yay" or "nay" in deciding on whether or not to see this man.
When/if a woman contacts me for a reference, I respond in a diplomatic manner. I would NEVER say "he's a bozo" or "he's the hottest in the world!!" but rather "you'll be fine with him" or "I didn't have the best time but..."
Because I'm still fairly new to this scene, I guess the bottom line question to all of my ranting is: are all providers so snippy with their references? What ever happened to girl power and feminism? Shouldn't we help protect each other?
Hugs, S.
I had a similar thing happen when I was screening a client last month, he gave me a list of 3 references all Las Vegas girls. I contacted each of them, as the return rate from many providers here seems to be quite slow, or some reply that they have no idea who the guy is or if they saw him. Anyways, 2 of the girls vouched for seeing him in the last 6 months and said he was a perfect gentleman. However, the other woman sent me back an awful email saying that she saw him the month before and he had told her she was the best provider he had seen and accused me of stealing her client. She went on and on how I wouldn’t be able to live up to the experience she gave, it was insane! I actually went and read his review on her and he did say she was great and that he would “defiantly see her again on his next visit” I guess she read that and was mad he didn’t follow through. It was just wacky! Funny thing is I am seeing him again next week so, : P on her, lol.
Maybe the girl that sent the snippy email also was mad that he was booking with you and not her (assuming you and she both live in the same town).
I am always happy to provide a reference, and what I dislike is getting a 1-line email saying, “Hi have you seen bill smith, iz he cool? Thax “ No introduction, no website link to prove that they are even a provider, no phone number or TER name to help distinguish between Bill in Chicago and Bill from Phoenix, and of course being the “Grammar Nazi” the horrific spelling, punctuation and capitalization errors kill me! I always write back asking who the girl is and where I can find her info. If the girl doesn’t have a website, any TER reviews, or a listing on Eros then I will not release any information, for all I know she could be a disgruntled wife looking for proof that her husband has been seeing providers.
-- Modified on 2/17/2006 12:12:07 AM
Hi Chase--
I have not met with you nor have I corresponded with you, but I do wish to get along with the ladies and gents in this area…
One more thing to share...I am a TOTAL FEMINIST and while I love and adore men, I am a pure supporter of women. Please look me up if you have any issues. I will share my phone number with you if you feel the need to call me....
Please do not doubt my feelings for women like us.
XOXO
Well sweetie,
We actually have met, and had about a 15 min conversation at the Superbowl party Saturday night. You had just come in from the pool (and looked sexy in your towel). Kid Creole was sitting between us for most of the time we talked, maybe that will jog your memory... no big deal, there were a lot of names and faces that weekend!
I know you are in Utah, but if you plan to be in town next week contact Miss Logan (www.misslogan.com) about an exclusive get together for providers only, I would be happy to vouch for you!
OMG...see what a flake I am!!! Yikes...
But honestly, get a hottub/pool between a beautiful woman and myself, and I'm sure to forget many events!!!!!
I am in Chgo this coming week, so please send me some warm Reiki vibes. I'm trying to get back early, like Weds/Thurs, and if so, I would love to play! The pool at my Vegas place is warm and a-waiting! Hugs...
S.
From anger to love just with the passing of a few comments-----from two wonderful ladies and Chase has another wonderful talent----that is moist and melts in your mouth!
-- Modified on 2/17/2006 7:48:58 AM
No not all providers are snippy with their references.
I am always glad to give a reference and help if I can . why ? because I am secure in who I am and just because a client saw me doesn't mean I own him and variety is the spice of life.
I understand that even if a client had a great time with me , next time maybe he wants something else . big deal .
Some girls get upset when a client chooses to see someone else , They get jealous ( go figure DAH you don’t own the client )
maybe the girl was just having a bad day .
Don’t take it personally as you should know there are all types of ladies out there . Some friendly , some backstabbing , Some secure , some jealous.
Now just a comment regarding references. Just because a guy was ok with me , doesn’t mean he will be ok with you .
I had that happen a few times before . The client was fine with me but yet another lady had a problem with that same client .
Maybe you didn’t have the best time with someone but yet another lady will .
So really for the most part you should go by your gut feeling and how you click with the guy when you talk to him over the phone.
Unless a guy is totally dangerous but if that is the case then word gets around about that .
If you ever need a reference don’t hesitate to contact me
Xoxo CindySpice
-- Modified on 2/17/2006 7:19:33 PM
Wow. That is a crabby response to a request for a little help. I agree with you 100%. We should look out for one another. But sadly enouph there are those who could care less - like you recently experienced. I am always happy to be a reference. For one thing, it means that the lady is being careful and watching out for her safety.
I don't offer to be a reference, but most gents have the courtesy to ask if it is OK with me first. And I always say yes, as long as I am contacted via email by the provider and not a phone call. I have only been denied verification once, and she was civil and had her reasons. All the other ladies have been very kind. We aren't all meanies...stay safe. Elaina
I just moved to Las Vegas recently and
I have the same problem (not as bad)
Most of them just don't answering,
so I have to ask for more references,
(it was a several very nice
ladies that answered me right away)
or I do full screening myself,
P.S You can always ask me for references
I'll be happy to help anytime
-- Modified on 2/17/2006 7:30:29 PM
Hi Selena,
I think that it would be better to get a reference from another known provider. It is important for our safety and who better to ask than someone who has already seen the gentleman.
I think sometimes that the guys don't tell the other lady that are going to use them as a reference and the lady thinks that since he told her you are the best or whatever he says that they are not going to see anyonelse.
I look at it this way. That gentleman is not ours he is is wifes, girlfriend or whoever he is with at that time.
Us as providers should help each other out.
We do need to stick together.
I try to always tell my gentleman friends if they need a reference to always use my name.
I want my fellow ladies to be safe and feel a little more comfortable going into the date.
If anyone ever needs a reference from me I always try and get back to them in a timely manner and give the best info I can.
Lets not get mad or upset, Just know that men like variety and if they like you they will come back.
Kisses and Hugs to all,
January Class
This has never happened to me.. usually they won`t get back to you at all. It doesn`t do us any good at all. to hear this.. and not her name.. Please do us all a favor and say who it is.. !! THANKS..
cuz then we can go beat the crap out of her. Just kidding, I am actually a very peaceful soul. But for those of us who freely offer references in a timely manner, it is frustrating to read that there are ladies who are less than cooperative. You need to give and get references to survive around here.
Lee Chase
Do unto others as you would like done to you...
Love, peace and joy to ALL...
Tia!!! xoxo
Most of us do not have a problem with a reference for a client whom we know, if you are getting a nasty response it is problbly someone who is upset because one of HER clients is looking for something different,which is totally Her problem
..
their $ = their choice
dont let it bother you sweety..some girls are just way too possessive of their client..which ultimately backfires on them..because if they wont give a client a reference who has been good to them in the past..what reason whould he have to go back..
have a great weekend..play safe
xoxoxoxo
lixxxz
kitty
Thank you all for being so supportive with your responses! I am very much a feminist and truly believe that women should help each other out--especially in this *hobby.*
I don't want to outright blaspheme the name of the woman who did not wish to be helpful, but I will say that her name rhymes with "Shmim Shmimmy Ditty."
I will always give an accurate, respectful reference whenever I can.
Big hugs and respect,
Selena
..kind of, and made me reminiscent of "The Cat in the Hat."![]()